To co-sleep or not co-sleep?

United States
January 6, 2007 8:46pm CST
Do you co-sleep with your baby/children? Why or why not? My friend and I were having this discussion on the phone earlier and it made me curious what you guys think. I sort of did and sort of didn't. I usually had trouble GOING to sleep if the baby was in the bed with me, so I often started them out in the bassinet right beside the bed. But that first 1am feeding and we were both sound asleep in the bed! *laughing* Baby nursing and me sleeping! (One of the little discussed benefits of breastfeeding - no need to get up!) What about you?
6 people like this
31 responses
• United States
7 Jan 07
I have a nine month old and he still sleeps with me not by choice he just won't sleep in his bed.ive tried but as soon as i lay him down he wakes up.but all my others kids slept in my bed till they were 4-5 months old because i felt alot safer that way.I was always worried about sids that is why i chose to co-sleep their are advantages and disadvantages(like not being able to sleep)
2 people like this
• United States
7 Jan 07
My daughter wakes up when I put her to bed either. My first I could nurse to sleep and lay him down without waking him. Or take him out of the carseat asleep and put him down. She wakes up every time. We set the timer and start her mobile and let her fuss a bit - if she's still awake after five minutes we'll get her up but usually she quiets back down.
@_hope_ (3908)
• Australia
7 Jan 07
well i had a bed experience with my first child who at the time was two weeks old i had been up to him a few times when hubby suggested i bring him back to bed with me he said feed him and he would put him back into his cradle. well we all went off to sleep then in the morning i said to hubby that the baby hasn`t woken up he wasnt in his cradle but was sound asleep in the foot of our bed and from then on we never took a baby to bed with us but when the children were older we would wake up in the morning with any number of the five kids asleep in the middle of us but we never had problems getting them to sleep in their beds at night
• United States
7 Jan 07
I cannot tell you the number of tiems I've fallen asleep nursing and my husband wakes me up so I'll lay down instead of crinking my neck all to pieces. :-)
1 person likes this
@red158 (334)
• Canada
7 Jan 07
I have 4 children, my oldest was the first niece in the house and my sisters would lie down with her to put her asleep, big mistake for she wouldn't go to bed alone. With the next 2 I tried to not allow this but daddy like to fall asleep with them. By the time the 4th one was born Daddy finally seen my point of view and even if it was nap time she was put in her crib awake. She would sleep wonderfully all by herself, in fact I once commented on what a good sleeper she was, then I discovered that she would wake up in the middle of the night and amused herself for an hour or 2 until she fell back to sleep. She was never in my bed until she was about 4 and very sick, I didn't like the idea of her being so far away so she slept with me for a 3 or 4 nights then it was back to her bed. When my children have a nightmare now I talk to them for a few minutes, tell them that Mom and Brad won't let anything happen to them, kiss them and they go off to bed. If it was a really bad nightmare I normally tell them to crawl in with their sister.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Jan 07
It's ironic becuase at the moment the child that co-slept the most with us the first four or five months is also the one sleeping the best through the night. **laughing** Each child is definately different aren't they? :-)
@ebsharer (5518)
• United States
7 Jan 07
We have a 1 month old right now and we let her sleep in our bed with us. She sleeps for 5 hours at a time when she is our bed and only about 2 hours in her bassenet. We always put her in her bassenet to start but she doesn't last long in there. She is awake with in 10 minutes. We have a big bed so I guess its ok for now, but once she is old enough to sleep in her crib ... no more in our bed. We don't want to start it now and in 2 years her still be in our bed. Our 9 and 5 year old are allowed in our bed in the morning to watch some cartoons before we get up but thats it.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Jan 07
She's little bitty still - It is SO much easier when they are younger isn't it?
@mbs730 (2152)
• Canada
7 Jan 07
I didn't allow my kids to sleep with me as infants because I was afraid that getting them to sleep alone would be hell. And they sleep very well alone. My sister in law and brother have slept with their baby and they have been having a hard time getting him to sleep in his own bed and he is almost 2. That is just my opinion though. You got to do what you are the most comfortable with.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Jan 07
Once my kids were sleeping through the night we didn't co-sleep anymore. And USUALLY they would begin the night in the bassinet next to the bed, or in thier crib and only come to our bed when/if they woke up. I don't have trouble with either of mine now except my two year old who flat doesn't like to lay down. **laughing** His issue isn't going to bed - it's being still for more than 30 seconds.
• United States
7 Jan 07
I made a mistake with my first child by laying down with him to get him to take a nap. Did I mention BIG mistake?? It got to the point where he would not go to sleep if I wasnt there for nap and bed time. And just when I thought he was asleep...and I would ease ever so slowly....out of the bed to slip out from the room....he would sit up and catch me sneakin out! LOL And back Id have to go....lol.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Jan 07
Neither of my children have turned out to be "dependant" on me for going to sleep - although my son still likes his "blankie". *laughing*
@polachicago (19075)
• United States
7 Jan 07
Why not? you creat great bond with your kid. I would not worry about.
1 person likes this
• United States
7 Jan 07
The research I read on the subject actually indicated that the baby's breathing patterns were healthier when co-sleeping becuase it was stimulated to breath by the mother being so close.
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Jan 07
Yes, I do co-sleep with my son. It started as a way for me to deal with my postpartum depression and get some sleep. (I thought he was "against" me and actively "plotting" to wake up when I put him down just so I wouldn't be able to sleep.) Then, it was just easier. He slept for longer periods at night, and therefore I got more sleep. He's 17 months now, and still usually sleeps with us.
• United States
9 Jan 07
I've heard that they sleep better co-sleeping. Thanks for pointing that out. I never thought about the post partum and depression issues that might arise. I know that the skin to skin contact can stimulate "mothering" hormones which is what I tell women having trouble with milk supply - never thought about the implications for PPD. Thanks for your response!
• United States
7 Jan 07
My baby girl - This is Bella....my little girl. The love of my life. I dont know how I ever got through life without her!
I did occasionally let my newborn sleep with me. Now my newborn is 2 years old in April, and still occasionally climbs in bed with me and cries until I let her stay . Well, occasionally isn't really the term anymore, its more like ALMOST EVERY NIGHT, and she has a toddler bed now, so its easier for her to get to my bed.....lol
• United States
9 Jan 07
We put a dog gate up the first time we found our two year old boy wandering the house at 3am. Now if he gets out of bed he usually crawls into the rocking chair and goes right back to sleep.
@Metallion (2230)
• United States
7 Jan 07
We decided not to because we didn't want to have to break our son of the habbit when he got older. Figured if you don't start it out that way you don't have to break it.
• United States
7 Jan 07
It is very hard to get a child to sleep in his own bed once he starts sleeping in yours. Both of mine were 2 before they slept alone through the night in their own beds. But, it was comforting to me to have them close.
1 person likes this
@mommycrat (148)
• United States
24 Jan 07
Angela! It's Brannan! :) I was just going to post this...great minds, huh? We cosleep so far..in our full size bed. Not a good plan. We're rapidly running out of room. I think we are going to put a twin size bed next to ours, and when Nate's ready he can sleep on that in his own room. Co sleeping is very much a family's personal decision. The important thing is paying attention to yours and baby's needs rather than soceity's ideals.
@srhelmer (6933)
• Beaver Dam, Wisconsin
24 Jan 07
Our daughter is 2 1/2 and she's only slept in bed with us one time. She can't get comfortable in our bed and has always preferred her own room.
• United States
11 Jan 07
We co-bedded. I had a bed for the boys that attached to ours. My boys were preemies and had to be woken up every 3 hours to be fed. When they came home they were only 3 pounds 10 ounces each and I could never have slept if they weren't in the room with me. But I could never do the Family Bed where we all slept in the same bed. My boys are movers and shakers and are ALL OVER the bed when they sleep. At 8 they refuse to sleep in seperate beds so they have a queen bed they share. It is really sweet still because sometimes they still "root" with their mouth when they are asleep. It makes me smile every time!
@wmaharper (2316)
• United States
10 Jan 07
I did both with the first one, not at all really with the second one though. BUt it is a definent benifit to be able to sleep while they nurse.. of course.. I'd always wake up with a cramp in my neck! (: WIth my oldest, I did, but he got so used to sleeping with us, it sort of back fired, and he didn't start sleeping through the night until he was about 1 year old. His little brother has been sleeping through the night since he was about 2 months old.. so it wouldn't have made sense to start a habit I didn't need. I don't think either one is better/worse.. just depends on what kind of sleeper you are.. I'm a very light sleeper.. and would wake up, when my husband would begin to roll over, just in time to put my hand out to protect the little one, needless to say, he stopped sleeping between us after that!
• United States
9 Jan 07
I am co-sleeping with my baby now. I hope I am not still doing it when she is 15!
• United States
7 Jan 07
Well we bought one of those playpens/bassinets. We used that until she was 6 months then stuck her in her crib. She slept in our room when she was in the bassinet. I prefer to have them in our room, in their own little bed rather than in the bed with me. I am too afraid of squishing the baby.
@chikku (673)
• India
7 Jan 07
i have been co-sleeping with my baby from the day one. you may call it overprotectiveness but i just couldn't have her sleep in her cradle. And now i am so used to it that if i happen to get a chance to sleep without her, i don't get a comfortable position to sleep..LOL
@magikrose (5424)
• United States
7 Jan 07
I had my kids sleep in the bassebett next to me. That way when they woke up I could get them easily. I wouldent ever have my child co-sleep in my bed with me. In my opnion it is a very bad habit to start because the child gets used to it and then wont sleep in there own bed when they get older.
@vinaykant (814)
• India
7 Jan 07
yes we have to take care our babies we have to sleep with them till age 3yrs after all they are our part.
• India
7 Jan 07
i am not a father now. i am 21 year old young man. still i belive everybody must co sleep with their chidren. this will give them confidence in you and make them courage that you are with them always.it is not necessory to co sleep with the children which is above 10 year old. because they need to live in this world indipendely. so let them sleep independely.