My Ex-boyfriend now has a baby....for once i felt sad, is that okay?

Philippines
January 7, 2007 4:01am CST
I felt sad not because of anything else..not because I'am still holding back, not because I love him still. We broke up March 2002, got back together on August 2003, then broke up the final time again the same month that year. I, personally have a new life now...I'am now in a blissful and lasting commitment for the last three years of my life. And I'am so very happy and blessed. But why do you think I felt a little sad upon hearing the news that my ex's gonna have a baby out of wedlock? Uncertainty of my present love is very OUT of the question...with that im so much sure. Do you think its because we've shared something special once in the past? that we had the thought of one day getting married and having our own family (with children)? Well atleast now Ive been through the 'little-sad' feeling I've had. But just for a clearance of thought, what do u guys think why i felt that way?
1 person likes this
10 responses
@cliffcliff (1350)
• United States
12 Mar 07
do you have a baby yourself also? maybe he got sad too....
1 person likes this
• Philippines
12 Mar 07
i don't have a child yet...
• United States
13 Mar 07
it only means that you are human if you are sad for him. Good that you are not angry over this situation. I was friends with my ex-gf for about a year and half after we separated. (She broke up with me...) But then after one and half years of casual friendship,no lovemaking etc... she began to resent me, and stopped being friendly to me. I dont know why, but she became mean to me and said awful things to me. I got sad too after that even though we were broke up.
@dopey22girl (3324)
• United States
13 Jan 07
I think it's because he was a big part of your past. It's not that you still love him, it's maybe that you still cared about him. And this is kindof reality..since he has a child with another woman, this is truly the end. Obviously you knew your relationship had ended, but the fact that he and another woman have a child together makes it feel more real. I hope you can understand it the way I am putting it into words. And the fact that you used to think you'd have children together may hurt a little as well.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
14 Jan 07
thanks for responding. I understand what you're trying to say.... it really didn't hurt me...i just become a bit sad but I eventually got over it. THANKS AGAIN
@iyamapa (259)
• Philippines
12 Jan 07
maybe i am one of the right person to say something about this... i do believe that you are happy now and i strongly agree that you dont love him anymore... the thing here is.. you and richard have shared good memories together... you've become good friends eventualy became more than friends and ended up as friends too. what made you sad really is the fact that he wasnt able to fulfill his dreams before having a baby. you know in a fact what he wanted. you know the hardship his been through... and this is just an effect of everything... you wish him good life.....in short
1 person likes this
• Philippines
13 Jan 07
hahahahahha....you know best! Ofcourse I wish him well.
@cnetboss (2477)
• Philippines
12 Jan 07
It's natural that you would feel a little sad because he as your ex but at least you have move on with your life with someone.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
12 Jan 07
yes i guess its just natural... at first i got a little bit worried but now i'am cleared with things and im finding myself happy and content with all God has blessed me with right now! thanks for the response :)
• Philippines
11 Jan 07
it happens, its ok. feelings is the hardest emotion and it is out of control. it will pass. do something that eats ur time
1 person likes this
• Philippines
12 Jan 07
Yes i know... Right now im much happier and blessed. I dealt with the pain quite well and made me reflect on life more.
• Philippines
8 Jan 07
It really hurts when the one you loved has a new life and love somebody but instead of being sad be happy for them. It's not the end of the world and I think your still young... Move on now...
1 person likes this
• Philippines
8 Jan 07
i think i have to stress again that i do not anymore love him. Infact we're not even as friends... no means of communication as in zero, none, zilch. I have moved on a long time ago. You might not quite comprehend what I wrote but thanks still.
@frankiko (70)
• Philippines
13 Jan 07
you dont love him anymore but still you get affected by what had happen to him...you ask us waht do we think,i think you just care for him..not that you love him,just care for him,its like when something like that happen to a freind,a relatives,or anyone you know,you just feel sad for them,that's it.....dont be confuse anymore and dont entertain that sadness...you have someone now,you have all the reason to be happy..
1 person likes this
• Philippines
13 Jan 07
Well I guess its destiny. If you really have feelings for the person then it will really hurt but time will heal all the hurts from the past. I have an experience like that also...3 years ago but I am happy with the person I am with right now. In fact I realized that every pain that I encountered in the past is ok because now there is someone who is loving me and we are happy together.
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@mansha (6301)
• India
12 Jan 07
I know I felt that once too, when my first love whom I never married had his baby before me. I think its hard to let the past go. In some corner you do mourn what could have been but as you said we have our own lives now and we shall be happy in them.
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@chiyosan (30206)
• Philippines
12 Jan 07
it is okay for you feel that way. do you have your bf? i mean you may be lonely thinking that he has already started a life of his own and now you reflected about and may have thought about having that life of your own too...
1 person likes this