Should i talk to my husband?????

Before,giving you my opinion,I would like you to know that I dont have any direct experience on the topic.And I am not married.Still,I can truthfully tell you that I have seen many people go through similar problems.And my suggestion is based on their experiences. First of all,let me remind you something which I am sure you already know.Its not easy to maintain the strength and commitment in a long distance relationship. "ABSENCE DIMINISHES LITTLE PASSIONS AND INCREASES GREAT ONES, AS WIND EXTINGUISHES CANDLES AND FANS A FIRE " 1.Make sure that both you and your spouse belong to the second category because,if you or your spouse feels free and happier when the other is not around it is a sign of your relationship going sour.Is your husband more comfortable when he is away?Does he really miss you and more importantly LOVE you still?Does he get reminded of your importance in his life when he is away?These questions apply to you too. 2.Your husband might be having a stressful time at work.And, you have to remember that he is living away from family.And, its you who should provide him comfort and understanding.Talk to him.Be gentle because its always easy to ruin a conversation by losing temper.Patience,is always an asset and in case of long-distance relationships it is a MUST.Try, not to lose your temper.Always,try to keep in mind that you are talking to the man you love.He is not your enemy. 3.What I am going to say now may or MAYNOT apply to you.This is an unpleasant topic, but it is important too.I have included this point here because of 2 reasons-ur husband is living away from you and he uses the word DIVORCE often. Make sure your spouse isnt having an extra-marital affair.DIVORCE is a strong word, and is always better if never used at all.And since he finds it so easy to scream "DIVORCE" at you, it COULD mean that he can live without you.Are you sure, he is not getting fed up with you?He hasnt contacted you for 6 days. Please dont jump into conclusions without strong evidence.Your husband might be the best man in the world,afterall. Its better if you dont question him directly on the matter.Because, even if he is cheating on you,he is never going to accept it and chance are that he might turn more secretive.Try to find out from his neigbours and collegues. Do it in such a way that you dont give your husband the oppurtunity to point a finger at you and accuse you of not trusting him.Its easier to find out how faithful he is, when he believes that you trust him completely. DONT SCREAM OR SHOUT AT HIM.Remember, you want to pull him towards you and not drive him away.Only love has the power to solve this type of problem.It requires a LOT of patience. 4.Now, this last point is applicable if all the above 3 points dont apply. He could be just short-tempered and maybe its his ego that doesnt allow him to make the first move to solve the quarrel. When he is in a good mood, tell him and make him understand how much you love him.Tell him how much it hurts you to hear him use the word 'DIVORCE' because he is the one you love the most.Make him understand its wrong to say this to his wife(who loves him a lot) even when he is crazy with anger.Tell him you too are alone here without his presence and his anger hurts you deeply and makes you feel more insecure than he thinks.If he truely loves you and cares about your feelings he will understand. 5.This is the most important point of all.Anger is never a solution to anything.It can only harm,weaken and destroy your love.Whatever his problem,you can only solve it with love and patience. All the Best!!

I believe that this particular discussion should not be on A web site like this. If what he said to you is so wrong and hurtful wouldn't he think that you recieving advice from complete starngers through a web site about your relationship seem to violate those same things. He is your husband, and not a one of us can truly know the situation between the two of you. It is your responsiblity to him to respect him and my opinion is that by you posting this discussion you have underminded that respect. If you want to see change then it has to happen on your end. You are the one that needs to put forth the effort to change, and by doing so hopefully he will respond in the same manner. But the is no way that you or anything that we say can change his mind. It starts with you.

You have to talk . But what would youtalk how would you talk depends on what your decision is assuming that this type of behaviour from your husband is not going to stop . I don't think he will change . Of course there is another question to be answered from your part to yourself . Did he usually behave you like now before going abroad ? If no there may be happening some real psychological change him that puts you in a doubtful position in his mind .And if it is so , it is very unlikely to change without a patient dialogue between you too . So you have to start a discussion from your initiative . Just make clear to him that enough is enough.In the meantime you make everything legally o.k lest you fall in a financial hardship .

If he was very rude and out of line than I wouldn't be making the first move. Threatening to divorce you everytime you fight is not at all nice, or very mature thing to do. If you keep apologising first everytime he's wrong, than it shows a lack of respect on his part, and a lack of maturity in the fact that he doesn't apologise. So do yourself a favour girl and hold out!

well I do know that this wrong of him to do, but when I got with my husband when we were dating we lived together when I got mad a said I wanted to break up I even went as far is either packing my belongs or his up but I would never leave we did break up 3 times and that was all him. I didnt do this as a joke but I did it when I was mad, also the first year of our marriage I scream divorce, but never would have done it, before you call me crazy or anything at the time me and my husband argued every day day in and day out before we got married he smoked and drank alot and even smoked pot witch he doesnt do now. when we first got married he was off all smoking and drinking but my dear husband had very bad teeth witch didnt help his temper, Now adays we are doing great my husband got his teeth pulled and we barley agrue and about a year ago I vowed not to say the " divorce" word again. I dont know why I would say I want a divorce because I would never divorce him so I dont know why your husband does it maybe you should ask and yes he is your spose talk to him first why does he live somewhere else and not with you?

you can come closer to me . my mail id ia pankajkumarpci@yahoo.com . leave your husband. i am with you.

in my opinion..yes...u should talk to him 1st to ask what's happening to you+him. ask if he still love you then just tell him whats ur feeling.for married couple to live in separate place is never been easy, a chance that the 3rd person might enter between ur relationship is wide open.so better if u discuss also this matter.hope everything will be going on better soon..

If you know that he will took to you soon whait for that moment but if you are not sure what he will do or He will not talk to you just write him 2-3 words and watch if he will answering you.

if i was you i would talk to your husband and tell him exactly how you feel.and let him know that you do not like it how he treats you when he gets angry.and that the things he says when he is mad you dont take as a joke you take them to heart.and explain to him that you should not have to contact him first especially when he goes on msn and does not even contact you he was in the wrong not you.

hi! wow.... haveu asked him about this matter? because if he act like that, there must be a reason. i think you better ask him whats going on. He should not be acting like that specialy he is far away from you.... asked him to talk about things between you and him

You should have talk to him..You are his wife, its not needed to have a contest between you and your husband who has the highest pride. Whatever his problem you have the right to know it..and help him about it! Ask him what is his problem why is like that...then discuss it well wiht no argument..

It sounds to me like he is being very mean to you. You shold tell him to stop that you dont like that adn he should be nicer to you. If you are his wife he should be nicer to you than to anybody! Its not right that hes mean to you.

that is man .. sorry man kekekeke but usually after divorce they will sad very sad ... more than woman ... may be U may talk to your husband for a while .. if nothin change .. u should takes another step ....

You should think with you brain and not with your heart and then take a decision

Was this an arranged marriage? Really confused why you would rely on the computer to speak with your husband, and also why he would ignore you when he was online. Is he overseas for work and there is a reason you couldn't go with him? I think we need to know more to have any idea what's going on in this case.

There could be several reasons this occurs...it could be a form of abuse, something he has observed within his own family and has brought with him into marriage, it could be frustration that he expresses in this manner, feeling the distance is unfair to both you and him...it could be he is afraid and has used this to express his fear, not understanding how it hurts you both...talk with him...there are other possibles, but it is best if you discuss it all with him rather than those of us here.

He was getting used to be pleased by you by your lot of patience.You spoiled him in that part like giving him the call, the mail and all other stuffs. You know marriage is a give and take relationship. Its not you only who will adjust but he would also learn. Its time for you to teach him a lesson. I could see he has a high pride , he is just waiting for you to make the moves as usual. YOu can talk to him first but explain to him its not healthy to be like that always. He should learn to accept mistakes and value your relationship.

I think you should tell him that talking about divorce every time you have a little "fight" is not going to solve things, and that every time he says that he is hurting your feelings. Probably he just cant understand how you really hate him saying that.

yes you can talk to him

Yes. If you're waiting for him to talk first, you may be waiting for a while. No point letting this chew on you while you wait. I dropped hints like that in my first marriage. She finally took them ... and found another man. Strange how it hurt when she did, yet I was glad at the same time because it let me "off the hook". All I wanted when I was doing this was OUT. I wasn't cheating and had no one else on my mind. Just wanted my freedom back. That was a young, foolish ME though. I'm not saying that's what he wants. That you will have to find out for yourself, and open communication is the only way.