Touchy situation!

United States
January 11, 2007 1:42pm CST
What if you were dateing a guy and you went to hang out with his cousin and girlfriend at thier house. You all cook out abd have a good time and you and your boyfriend eventually fall asleep on the couches in the downstairs living room. At some point that night you are awakened by a sensation. You open your eyes and see the cousin standing over you and rubbing your nipple. You close your eyes back and pretend it was a dream and he goes away and doesn't come back downstairs. The next day it was never mentioned but he did act diferently toward you. The more you think about it the more it bothers you. Do you tell your boyfriend and risk ruining his relationship with this cousin. Ruin the relationship of the cousin and his girlfriend that had just had a baby. You know that if the relationship with you and your boyfriend works out you will have to see this cousin at family functions and other things. What would you do? What if your boyfriend doesn't even believe you over his family?
1 person likes this
6 responses
• United States
11 Jan 07
well if i was in this situation i would have to tell someone and take my chances because what your boyfriends cousin did was wrong.and its not your fault he is some kind of pervert.he had no right to do what he did to you.so i would have to tell my boyfriend if i was you.he might have a hard time believing it but at least you told him and were honest with him these people need to know what kind of guy this cousin is to do this kind of thing.
• United States
11 Jan 07
This is a situation that happened to me before I got married and I did marry the boyfriend in question. I did end up telling him eventually about what happened but we just chose to let it go. I hate haveing to see the cousin but I am a forgiveing person. Sometimes I wish my husband had of pounded him though ya know?
@Sailor (1161)
• United States
13 Jan 07
Well, that is a predictament, because you can not truely accuse him. Does your gut tell you that it was real? And a lot depends on how serious the relationship is between your BF and you. It is also common for a non family member to not be believed over family.
1 person likes this
@kittykatzz (1133)
• United States
13 Jan 07
hmm.. not too sure what to think here.. is there a chance he may have been sleepwalking?? i probably would have made some time to speak with him alone before talking to anyone else. (unless you feared him) and just asking him outright.. thats extremely strange behavior seeing as to how your s.o. what right there sleeping, he may have not realized what he was doing till you woke up and then not knowing what to say, couldnt help but act "weird" about it the next day.. obviously i dont know ALL the specifics of your situation and although it may be "water under the bridge" now.. it seems to still somewhat affect you or you wouldnt have written about it... id ask him, but confidentially. and just say something along the lines of "im not trying to open up the past here, but do you remember..... and its still bothering me that i didnt ask you back then" id tell him you will keep his answer confidential (even if you choose to tell your husband later) and that you just need peice of mind and closure.
1 person likes this
@krysy1982 (1042)
• United States
12 Jan 07
I would have told my b/f.
1 person likes this
@Thoroughrob (11750)
• United States
12 Jan 07
I think I would probably be totally honest with my boyfriend. Honesty is a big ting in a relationship and you don't want to start out with secrets.
1 person likes this
@rainbow (6763)
11 Jan 07
I would keep quiet, but make sure you are not in a similar stiuation by not staying overnight if you can help it. If something happens again you re going to have to tell your boyfriend that his cousin makes you uncomfortable and you do not feel safe if left alone with him. If he keeps asking tell him you are afraid he will not believe you and that it will cause a row so you'd just like to not see them as much for a little while. If you have to tell him, don't make to big a deal of it but just say it made you feel uncomfortable, explain why you didn't tell him before and how you are conerned about it causing problems with hiscousins girlfriend and baby, when he's calmed down he'll probably let it go and not see them as much. I wish you the best of luck with this,
1 person likes this