To love or be loved?

Indonesia
January 11, 2007 9:23pm CST
I'm in this relationship with my bf for almost a year now, and he's been nothing but super nice and xtra care for me. I know that he loves me deeply. Everytime something bugs me or doesn't go my way, i can get really mad and blame him for everything. And all he did was said that he's sorry, and tried his best to make it up tome, by buyng me gifts, or take me out to dinner and a movie. At first i'm enjoying it so much. But ii gotten really worst latetly, and it's becoming far than you can call a healthy relationship. Sometimes i did something wrong, get really made, and he's the one who ended up saying he's sorry. I feel like i'm such a horrible person now. I can't take him for granted anymore...i can't even deal with myself sometimes when i'm being so stupidly selfish. I don't even know how he can put up with me after all this time. And i'm becomening more and more selfish that i ever was. He's way to good for me. I care for him but i'm not sure that i love him as much as he love me, and he even starting to discuss about getting married next year. How can i deal with myself? Would you rather love or be loved?
2 responses
• India
12 Jan 07
Its really nice that you have started realising your mistake.In any relation being loved or giving love go hand in hand.If any one of these fail there is a strong chance of the relation breaking.So,dont worry just try to rectify your mistakes and start being nice to him.Afterall he deserves it.
• Indonesia
12 Jan 07
Thanks for your advice. I knew i've made a huge mistake, but i do have all the intention in the world to make it up to him. Finding the right person might took a lifetime. I need to try to appreciate him more from this day forward.
• Indonesia
12 Jan 07
i've been on your boyfriend position. Getting married and just dating (relationship) are two different thing. i can only tell you one things that : You'll never feel loosing untill you really loose it ... hope that you take more time with yourself, evaluating your feelings, your dreams, your passion, and your commitments ... and ... i've broke up with that girl, and she's crawling & begging me to go back with her ... but i've found another girl ... hope that you'll not experiencing the same way as she did ...