make myself more interesting to older women

United States
January 17, 2007 10:13pm CST
I have met a woman I am really interested in and have made myself her slave nearly for four years without being able to get any romantic response and its driveing me crazy. Anyone got any ideas as to what I'm doing wrong?
1 person likes this
10 responses
@mizrak07 (557)
• Philippines
18 Jan 07
What do you mean slave for 4 years? Maybe you need to find someone else.
• United States
18 Jan 07
I don't want anyone else, I just want more of a relationship with her. I am on call for her 24 hours a day.
@mizrak07 (557)
• Philippines
18 Jan 07
I think its time you ask her whats the problem. If she's attracted to you then whats holding her?
• United States
19 Jan 07
I cain't seem to tell her because I don't want to lose what little relationship I have now and I'm afraid she will decide she doesn't need me at all.
@hyper99 (23)
• Canada
19 Jan 07
Are you asking how to make yourself more interesting to older women, or in particular, more interesting to just "one" older woman. . . Seems like this "one" is just milking ya for all she can get, but I could be wrong. . . Have you told her how you feel about her, and, does she know what you want out of this relationship? If so, then it is time to lay down the ultimatum (and after four years noless), say that you need to feel in-love & respected, for the relationship to move forward, otherwise you'll have to stop seeing her in order to GET OVER HER. . . And/or, maybe your lady is the type who responds when there is no action. I mean maybe she, would rather make the first moves, but does not know this yet, humm. . .
• United States
20 Jan 07
This is the best advice so far I beleive. May-be I should tell her even though there is no way I can stop seeing her on any terms.
• United States
29 Jan 07
WEll in case you were interested I had a talk with her and poured out my hopes and feelings and she asked for time to think about the new developements. Well it took days and on into the second week and she called me and asked me to buy some things from home depot and come over, which I did.She stressed religious beleifes as reason for our "relationship" to have to remain on a friendly basis and not escalate any futher. She has only been with one man in her life and even though he has been remarried twice since their demise, she says that women can only give themselves to one man in their life to ensure ther place in heaven. Well I have taken her rejection to heart and now I do not call three times a day as I have for the last four years, and even though when she told me I felt like someone had hit me in the stomach with a baseball bat for several days I now feel releaved to a sense and like a load lifted off me and I see that she uses me for a common laborer with no love in our relationship at all. I still keep in contact and do things for her but not with the conviction I used to and I have said no to her a few times in the last three days. She now called me also. I love her but I do not feel tied to her any longer. Thank you for your advice and everyone else also as it helped me make up my mind to pour it out and see where the chips landed so to speak. JOKER
@smartnrich (1067)
• Malaysia
19 Jan 07
What is your reason for this relationship? You must have the best reason to remain your relationship with her or you will be dissapointed at the end.
• United States
19 Jan 07
she is the essence of what I want in a woman. I was a good friend of her husband for several years, and when he suddenly filed for devorce and left her for another woman, I more or less started doing everything I could for her and I am caught in an internal trap I guess and can not seem to escelate our "relationship" further than what it is. In asking for your opinion and any help you might give me in telling me what I can do, I must tell you my friend was our pastor and she was his wife for 38 years. She has never been with another man other than what she and I have I don't beleive. Do you think I have a shot or am I doomed to slavery?
@rking247 (65)
• United States
18 Jan 07
yo,for love,there is no age limit,you say you are her slave,does she knows this?have you tell her how you feel about her?maybe if you did she can tell you how she feels about you and you may end up braking those chains for good,tell her how you feel if u haven't and let us know what happen,cos'this is goooood.
• United States
19 Jan 07
Yes I guess she doe's, she says all the time she feels like she is takeing advantage of my good heart and she feels like I'm her brother, and I just cain't seem to, altho I try, to tell her how I feel and each time I try I get messed up and she seems to change the subject. may-be I'm chaseing a lost cause but I keep thinking if I just wait and keep at her beck and call someday may-be...
@PhMaker (250)
• United States
18 Jan 07
Sometimes there is no right or wrong, there is just no mutual attraction. Thats it, period. The more u work hard the more u get hurt or frustrated, accept the fact
• United States
18 Jan 07
I think the attraction is there but just not the way I want it to be, we go out occasionaly for lunch or dinner, we shop and do other things of intrest to her, but she is ten years my senior and I think that may be part of my problem, or may-be I am not attractive enough for her, I just don't know.
• United States
31 Jan 07
Maybe you are too available? It is possible that she takes you for granted because you do so much for her?
@kmgupta (561)
• India
29 Jan 07
yes sometimes
@rking247 (65)
• United States
20 Jan 07
by now you should know already what to do with this woman,oviously she's just using you,you say you have tried to tell her your feelings and she ignores you,believe me i have gone trhu the same thing a few times,and i kept been the slave thinking that woukld changeand guess what,it never did,4 years is very long,time to brake the chains,there is a saying in spanish "uno es pendejo hasta que uno quiera"it means "you are an idiot untill you want to" ther is something better for you outhere.
@phon4u (2217)
• Laos
19 Jan 07
you shoud learn to be free from being slavery. If you are still young, look for the younger to enjoy your life more. Don't spend time on used things.
@Terri_R (302)
• United States
18 Jan 07
This sounds like a fatal attraction to me. If she accepts you being her "slave" then perhaps she is taking advantage of you. Honey, if she has shown no romantic interest in you in four years then it is time for you take an honest look at your "relationship".