Report cards came out yesterday...

United States
January 18, 2007 8:16am CST
Hi you guys, I need some advice..I have been encouraging my son to try a little harder in school & finally all my talks paid off. He came home with all A's. I even cried tears of joy because this boy has worked my last nerve since kindergarden. Now he is in 3rd grade and I am finally seeing some improvement. How should I reward him? I don't want him to be spoiled with electronics such as PSP, X Box 360. He already has a cell phone (just so i know exactly where he is), but my fear is ..if i reward with a $300 gift, whats next...a 7 day cruise to the Islands when he graduates 5th grade? What can I do reward him?
7 people like this
65 responses
• Canada
18 Jan 07
That's fabulous, monicathinks! Congratulations to your son on a wonderful report card!! You must feel so proud and excited that you've motivated him to do well! I had started a discussion a little while ago about whether or not people "pay" for grades / report cards and I found people's ideas very interesting! Personally, I don't give large gifts or cash to my girls at report card time but we always have a celebration dinner that's now become "report card dinner." That night is entirely at their choice... go to a restaurant, get take-out and eat at home, the actual meal is whatever food they want to eat, with no input at all from me or my husband (except to pick up the tab LOL). It's all about celebrating their success, as a family, so they know how proud we are of their accomplishments. We've done it for years now and, when the report cards come home, they just smile and say, "So, what's for dinner?"
1 person likes this
@jmcafam (2891)
• United States
18 Jan 07
I think your "report card dinner" idea is really great. How nice for your children to be able to chose something they would like to eat for the whole family. They really must get a kick out of it. Now as far as paying for grades I think it gets a little tricky there.
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Jan 07
We just so happened to go out for dinner as well...thanks thinking out loud.
@gapeach65 (805)
• United States
18 Jan 07
Why not just something simple like taking him to a movie or out to eat, (let him choose) and let him bring a friend. My son is also in the 3rd grade and because we don't go out to dinner or movies often, even a trip to walmart is a real treat, IF I let him bring his buddy. That way he won't expect a cruise next time. (I know what you mean about that too, I know people who always seem to have to up the ante, and believe me, the kids know what they're doing when that happens too). I have a daughter who just graduated College and my son WILL graduate High School in May (or else) =) I've never been one to reward for grades because we couldn't afford it, which was hard because their step sister got $1 for each A. Maybe that would work too. My 3rd grader loves to have his own money. Hope these ideas help.
• United States
19 Jan 07
Thanks for the advice. I will try.
@foxbrain (204)
• India
19 Jan 07
Atleast someone here is a good parent. Just say rewarding is not entirely dependent on items. Ever thought what else his room needs to make him study better like fresh coat of paint a larger desk or a well lit lamp. Creative talent books like art and games of mathematical trends etc.
1 person likes this
@bigedshult1 (1613)
• United States
18 Jan 07
take him to some place like CHUCK-E-CHEESE'S PIZZA WITH ONE OR TWO FRIND AND SET A 5OR 10 DOLLER LEMNT ON THE GAME AND HE WILL BE HAPPY BUT YOU MUST OG WITH HIM NOT JUST SEND HIM AND PLAY SONE OF THE GAME WITH HIM YOUR TIME IS THE MOST INPORT PART OF THE REWARD YOU CAN GIVE HIM
• United States
19 Jan 07
I wouldnt go that huge. How about 50.00. and maybe a nice reward dinner. you dont have to go that huge. Or he will expect more and more.
• United States
19 Jan 07
I agree, I took him to dinner. Thanks
• United States
18 Jan 07
A $300 gift sounds a bit overboard for a good report card. When my daughter gets a good report card, we usually take her out to dinner at her favorite restaurant and I buy her something in the $20 range.
• United States
19 Jan 07
I was being sarcastic about the $300, there is no way I am spending that kind of money. Thanks for participating in the discussion. LOL
• United States
18 Jan 07
That is terrific that your son got straight A's. It is a wonderful mile stone in his young life. You should reward him with something small. A large gift is not necessary to show you appreciation for his hard work. Let him pick what you make for dinner, have a movie night, take him out to dinner, let him have a sleepover, take him to the local arcade and give him $20 worth of tokens, ect. Think small and simple because as he does get to be older, he will expect bigger gifts or cash. We have our daughter sign a contract at the beginning of each semester. She is in 7th grade. We put a dollar denomination for A's & B's and if she receives a D, the contract is void. We have used horse riding lessons as an incentive. Next 9 weeks it is softball, which she loves. The agreement is that if any grade drops below a C that she can not play in May. We have used her picking out a special dinner to be prepared and sleepovers as incentives also. Be creative, rewards do not have to cost alot. Maybe have pj night and eat in the living room watching movies! Kids love simple silly things that aren't the norm. Have a picnic in the basement minus the ants. ect...
• United States
19 Jan 07
Thank you so much for your input. I think the sleep over and picnic is a wonderful idea.
@aries6484 (279)
• India
18 Jan 07
well done.tell him continue like this.but cell phone at school level is more this days.and give him love but don't keep him on your head because after when he grows up he don't listen then.so make your kid have some fear of parents.he should fear of his future and have respect for future.then he will come up.always don't allow your kid to know outside world but instead you create a seperate world for him.if he knows outside world he will get spoiled.
• India
18 Jan 07
hi i like your comments... really superb! what do say is correct that dont keep anyone on your head because after when he grows up he dont listen then.... this line really highlight one.... guide me.... encourage me from your side..... i am expecting your reply.....
@patootie (3593)
18 Jan 07
May I just say a hearty congratulations young man .. you have obviously worked hard and done very well ... you have a great future ahead of you :o) Now mum ... reading through several other folks posts I think the ideas for a celebration dinner, maybe a special movie treat or even let him choose which activity he would like to do .. perhaps try a new sport or something .. go karting, skiing, skating .. whatever sports you have nearby ... perhaps let him take his best mate .. make a big family celebration of it .. I'm sure most kids would much prefer to feel their family is proud of them than to have a gadget that will be out of date in no time ..
@nw1911guy (1135)
• United States
19 Jan 07
The activity thing is a good idea. I like that.
@icequeen (2843)
• Canada
18 Jan 07
That's great...glad he is doing so much better. However...why does he have a cell phone at his age...? My son doesn't even have a cell phone and he is 14...However...back to your question. I would reward him with taking him to his favourite place..perhaps a dinner out. Or maybe there is something he has wanted...not to expensive....Let him stay up a little later...etc.
• United States
19 Jan 07
LOL..I can understand why you questioned the cell phone...but it was to keep track of him. This is also the first year he has to walk home from the bus stop. So I figured let me keep tabs that way. Trust me I hate having to pay the bill. Where I live it's the same amount every month ($50). I dont have to worry about high bills.
• United States
25 Jan 07
It's not about giving fabulous gifts to show how much you're proud of him. Well, maybe little rewards, but not that grand like a $300 gift. Maybe you could treat him to the movies, a park, or mall. Or even a dinner at a nice restaurant. Also, tell him how you appreciate his hard work and encourage him to keep this up.
@imakella (669)
• United States
19 Jan 07
i think show him the proofs or somereal examples..
@klystron635 (1520)
• Philippines
19 Jan 07
I do experience having high grades. So basically I'll be giving an advice from a student-child point of view. Well, usually my parents promise me stuffs. But it never happen. Too bad! It felt bad. If ever you have said something to your son, you should really do it. It will break his heart. If you don't want to spoil your child you can give him a special dinner or a special day to bond. Let him choose the restaurant, his food. Make him feel that it is his day.
@sbeauty (5871)
• United States
19 Jan 07
Children today get too many rewards for just doing what they should have been doing all along. Material rewards just don't mean anything, because most kids have more toys, etc. than they know what to do with. You might try helping him set up his own savings account with a few dollars you give him for having a good report card. Then, every time he brings home good grades, reward him with a trip to the bank to put a few more dollars into his account. Make a big deal out of the trip, stop and buy burgers, whatever. By doing so you'll be reinforcing both how proud you are of him for his grades, and you'll be helping him start some money and savings skills, too.
@berry9 (590)
• India
19 Jan 07
ask him what he wants?Get him something that will be useful for him.Otherwise give him 100$ and ask him to buy what he wants.But to think again,you better accompany him.Giving that much money to a kid can make him indulge in something bad.give a small party for him and his friends at home to appreciate his achievement.
@nhingneng (131)
• Philippines
19 Jan 07
wow! congratulations! you really must be very proud to have a very talented son. as for the reward ask him what he really wants, by then he would know that if he continues getting straight A's he can ask for anything in return.
@abhiquest (580)
• India
19 Jan 07
Your reward should not come in as a bait! It should be something which he had always cherished, and something from which he could learn a bit more. Some musical instrument (if he loves music) or a sports equipement, depending upon his interest could just well be a fine gift. I think something where he can again prove his merit should be a nice reward. Something which he would remember for a long long time - something which could help him make a career.
• Philippines
19 Jan 07
u have a great son.i want my son to be like that.u will be good parents if u have a good and very much encouraging son to have his dreams to be fullfilled.
• United States
19 Jan 07
Give your son a pat on the back and tell him well done. What I used to do with my son was let him decide what he would like to do. We would give choices of going out to eat at a place of his choice, we could go bowling, we could go to the movies, and one time he picked a couple of hours at the arcade. We would always let him invite a friend along. I would let him know that the grades were very important to his future and if he kept up the good work one day he would be rewarded with a certificate that said he was done with school. He used to ask how long that was and I would just tell him well that depends on if you go to college or not.
@subha12 (18463)
• India
19 Jan 07
gife him few good books that he will enjoy. any expensive gadgets will make him ask for more.