Do you sleep in the same bed as your spouse?

@catherIN (430)
United States
January 23, 2007 1:58pm CST
This is not meant to be crude. I mean do you literally sleep in the same bad as your spouse? If not, why? I know several people that don't.One spouse sleeps on a couch or recliner.I even know one couple that have seperate bedrooms. If you sleep seperately, does it affect your relationship badly?
10 people like this
37 responses
@lisa101 (1363)
• United States
23 Jan 07
I do sleep in the same bed with my spouse but i really wish i could sleep in my own bed. he takes all the room in the bed and grinds his teeth. I cant sleep but when i try to sleep on the couch he gets mad. So i just deal with it because it would hurt our relationship badly if we slept seperatly
3 people like this
@catherIN (430)
• United States
24 Jan 07
I hope that he at least lets you take naps during the day.If not you must be exhausted!
• India
23 Jan 07
of course i sleep wid my spouse..but i know there are certain people who dont...but let me tell u if u r sleeping wid ur spouse then u can feel the closeness wid ur wife..if u r sleeping separate then u gonna loose ur love lost day b day..
3 people like this
@Ravenladyj (22937)
• United States
24 Jan 07
"if u r sleeping separate then u gonna loose ur love lost day b day" I'm assuming you mean that if you sleep seperately you will lose your love day by day? if that IS what you mean I ahve to say that I totally disagree with you...where you sleep has nothing to do with how much or your ability to love each other in my opinion...
• United States
24 Jan 07
For the most part we do sleep in the same room, but he goes through these periods where he sleeps downstairs on the couch. I think it's because he's too lazy, tired, whatever to drag himself upstairs. It's just easier for him. I don't like waking up to find him not there, but not enough to go get him!
@amoreco (180)
• United States
23 Jan 07
We do sleep at the same bed.He sleeps on the other bedroom, if my 1 year old is sick, and wants to sleep in my bed.If there is a reason to sleep in separate beds,it's ok..but if for no particular reason you start in separates beds, there is a problem.
3 people like this
@ugachaka (297)
• United States
23 Jan 07
My girlfriend can be a bit of a bed hog and always wants to lay on top of me. That and if I'm not all that tired, we tend to keep talking and keep each other awake. Sometimes it's just easier for me to sleep on the couch. It's brand new and it's nice having it all to myself. My girlfriend whines for me to come back there and it just depends on how I feel. If I've slept on the couch a couple nights in a row it can be hard to go back to sharing a bed.
3 people like this
@cherhost (1073)
• United States
23 Jan 07
we sleep in the same bed. but sometimes him or i sleep out on the couch. i will if he is snoring too bad and he does it when he is sick or when he falls asleep there and i do not wake him. i dont think it is a bad thing but it does take the comfort of being together away.
3 people like this
@xXmeganxX (4423)
23 Jan 07
i sleep in the same bed as my partner, but sometimes i don't, it doesn't affect our relationship tho! :)
3 people like this
• United States
24 Jan 07
He works nights, so he's usually not home when I'm sleeping. However, when he is home we're in the same bed...usually cuddled up taking up less than half the bed!
@shooie (4988)
• United States
24 Jan 07
sounds like moi
1 person likes this
• United States
24 Jan 07
Yeah, I can't stand him working nights...but it's something I will have to adjust to, again:(
@Lostinoz (145)
• United States
23 Jan 07
This is a very interesting question! My husband and I have been married for 23 years and do sleep in the same bed. We have also never spent the night apart. I could not imagine NOT lying beside of him at night. I come from a family, going back to great-grandparents I remember, who all shared separated rooms including my own parents. When I asked them why they had separate bedrooms I was given varied responses like "he/she snores", "health issues", etc. It did not seem to affect their relationships adversely at all. I guess it is just a personal preference agreed upon by the couple.
2 people like this
@catherIN (430)
• United States
24 Jan 07
I never really thought having seperate rooms was very common.Maybe it was. I thought this was something new going on.
@dmillman (2273)
• United States
23 Jan 07
Well, this is an interesting one. We sleep in the same bed, most of the time, but we don't sleep under the same blankets. See, I'm a blanket hog. I wrap myself up in the blankets so he doesn't get any. That's why we've decided to go with seperate blankets. So sometimes when he snores too loud, he'll sleep upside down (his feet and head at opposite ends as mine). When he works his other job though, and gets home in the wee hours of the night, he sleeps on the couch so he doesn't wake me up. I think if we had a house I'd want an extra bedroom just in case he's snoring too loud, or when he comes home at weird hours and doesn't want to wake me.
2 people like this
@catherIN (430)
• United States
24 Jan 07
Hee hee, seperate blankets.My husband and I sometimes end up with seperate blankets.It's my fault.I go through periods of hogging the covers to get all snuggled up.Poor guy, finally realized that was why I keep another blanket near the bed.It's for him!
• United States
24 Jan 07
i sleep in the same bed as my spouse because i am very close to my husband
@ginny36 (267)
• United States
30 Jan 07
My boyfriend and I sleep in the same bed. We usually start out snuggled up and then end up each curled up in our own blankets. I like knowing he's there next to me - it makes me sleep better! But I also know couples who don't like sleeping together. My parents haven't slept in the same bed much in years. Dad snores and likes to be cold when he sleeps, and Mom likes to be toasty warm, so it works better for them that way. I think the only way sleeping in separate beds effects the relationship badly is if it puts an end to other bedroom activities, if you don't bond in other ways, or if one person would prefer to be sleeping together. If both people prefer being able to sprawl out in their own space to sleep, more power to 'em!
@catherIN (430)
• United States
4 Feb 07
Snoring does seem to be a factor in alot of the couples that sleep seperately.My husband is pretty tolerant. I know I snore.I can't deny it. When you wake yourself up snoring, you have to admit it. Thankfully, hubby says that I don't snore any where near as bad I use to.
@Ravenladyj (22937)
• United States
24 Jan 07
Nothing crude about that question at all IMO..and to answer it, yes we sleep in seperate beds, in fact we have completely seperate bedrooms and have since before we got married! As far as how it affects our relationship goes, its actually BETTER for us as a couple to have our own rooms...
1 person likes this
@catherIN (430)
• United States
25 Jan 07
I'm curious. Can I ask why? It doesn't make you feel lonely? Do you feel like you are missing out on any closeness? Or is it kind of along the lines of "distance makes the heart grow fonder"?
• United States
24 Jan 07
Yes, i do sleep in the bed with my hubby. I think that maybe a reason i have three kids...lol. Anyways.. i feel close, and safe when we sleep in the same room together. now there has been times when we may fuss about something and he goes to sleep on the couch. but when i wake up in the morning he's lying next to me.
@catherIN (430)
• United States
29 Jan 07
LOL about the kids comment. That's great that he ends up next to even after you have fussed about something.Knowing that someone will always be there gives a sense of security.
• United States
24 Jan 07
I guess everyone has their own preference. Personally, I work nights 5 nights a week. And I miss sleeping in the same bed at the same time as my hubby. Usually we always do sleep together, and needless to say, we enjoy the weekends when we can share the bed. It creates an intimacy.
1 person likes this
@catherIN (430)
• United States
24 Jan 07
I'm sure working 5 nights a week makes you appreciate being able to cuddle up alot more. I do have a question. How do you work 5 nights and still be able to sleep at night on the weekends? I think my sleep patterns would be a mess.
@matlgal (1687)
• United States
24 Jan 07
Well yes on most nights. If I get to sleep before he does then his snoring usually will not wake me. He is a very restless sleeper so if he gets to moving around too much it will wake me and I am outta there back to the guest room. I work so have to be up at 5:30 am. no time to mess with my sleep! LOL. Most nights we sleep peacefully together, with our 80 lb. Lab too.... California King size bed helps. LOL
1 person likes this
@catherIN (430)
• United States
24 Jan 07
So, who takes up more of the bed and snores louder, your hubby or the 80 lb Lab? LOL Does your Lab try to take over your bed? I'm just curious since he's a big dog.
@gapeach65 (805)
• United States
15 Mar 07
I sleep in the same bed with my husband. He wouldn't have it any other way. I couldn't imagine having separate bedrooms either, although, I'm sure my husband wouldn't mind if I had a separate room for my mess! I would imagine it would have to affect the relationship in some way, I don't know if badly though, because if you or your spouse has sleep problems, it might actually be better.
@ljcapps (1926)
• United States
15 Mar 07
My wife and i do share a bed, but since i work an odd shift, we rarely get to actually sleep together more than a few hours a night. but really, i sleep better just knowing she's nearby, whether she's sleeping with me, or puttering around the house.
@happymommy3 (2013)
• United States
15 Mar 07
That's funny, well not really, but I just saw that on good morning america yesterday. Seems like a lot more people are doing it now than we really think. I sleep in the same bed as my spouse because it would feel kind of wierd not too. Alot of older people are doing that, who knows I might feel differently later when I am a little older but for now I feel comfortable in sharing the bed with my hubby.
1 person likes this
@chebin (286)
• Philippines
11 Feb 07
hmmm... yes, we sleep in the same bed :) we even co-sleep with our 5-month old son :) well, in our case, whenever the other doesn't sleep in our bed, that means we're not in good terms or if not, our sleeping position changes!
1 person likes this