Interracial Relationships

@epenner (162)
United States
January 24, 2007 1:18pm CST
What are your views on interracial relationships. I am a caucasion female with a spanish/black man. I live in a community that has no problem with this, but my family does. I have been with this man for 3 years and we have a wonderful relationship. I don't let family impact my decisions on my relationship as far as who i see. Is anyone else in turmoil with friends or family who dissapprove of interracial relationships?
2 people like this
6 responses
@Bee1955 (3887)
• United States
8 Mar 07
My father was a dark, olive-green complexioned Italian-American. Mother was a light-skinned Turk. This is what they call interracial back in the early and mid 20th century. My parents went thru h@ll and when 3 kids were born (all with mum's light skin), people didnt know how to react. I heard all the racial slurs applied to my father, including the "N" word, so did they. However, it only made their bond tighter and each overcame the other's cultural differences as well because they loved each other enough to do so. My late husband was from Pakistan. I went there to live to learn his life because he spent enough time in the US to know mine here. If you marry someone of another race or country, you have to start compromising and adapting to new ideas and make them your own on both sides. Just like my parents did and I did until my husband was killed in an car crash. As for worrying about what the rest of the world thinks - they'll get over it. Use your energy to keep yourselves focused on building a positive relationship.
@avonrep1 (1863)
• United States
4 Feb 07
People are stupid, in general when it comes to stuff like this. My father use to be one of the biggest racist I knew. I went off on him once,when I was a teenager telling him that everyone was just like us. He was claiming to be a Christian but didn't like people from other races. I told him strip the color off everyone, and everyone would look the same. Told him he was 55 years old to grow up, that I would date who ever made me happy, and I would only married someone who treated me right and that I was truely in love with. For me it worked, my dad will be 70 this year. Its been 15 years and he has changed in that respect. I know most people won't be that easy, but showing them the flaws in how they think can change how they think. Good luck and as long as he treats you right and loves you, tell them you wish they could be happy for you. If he was treating you badly then you would understand their objections. But to make their decision based on the man not his skin color.
@XxAngelxX (2835)
• Canada
4 Feb 07
Good for you on not letting your family decide what is right in your relationship. I think the views on interracial relationship stem from the way people were raised a long time ago. I think the world in becoming generally more accepting of this. Personally I don't think it has anything to do with what color skin a person has, it should have to do with how much you share in common. Hope everything works out well for you in your relationship and I hope your family soon comes to the conclusion that a person cannot be judged by their skin color.
1 person likes this
@nykohl (21)
• Canada
4 Feb 07
I have been dating an Indian (he is Sikh, but not heavily involved in Sikhism) for a year and a half now. His parents say that they're fine with the idea, and marriage has even come up, with their approval, but I know that deep down, no matter who he marries, if she's not Indian, they will be disappointed. Ultimately, though, they just want what's best for their son. My parents welcome him into their houses with open arms, but other relatives haven't been understanding. For instance, when I told my uncle, he actually choked on his spaghetti. That was followed by an hour-long lecture by my aunt on how different our cultures are and that I would have to be very careful not to get myself into any trouble. It's never an easy thing, my father is constantly asking me if my relationship is still 'on' and if he's broken my heart yet, and my mom is always wary, though less so than my dad. We get the strangest looks sometimes, especially during tourist season when there's people in town that don't know us, or aren't used to seeing a white girl with a brown boy. I think the only person who is genuinely happy for us, besides ourselves, is my step-mom, who said to me the other day, "Are you two getting married yet? I can't wait to have little chocolate-coloured grand-babies running around!"
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Jan 07
That situation is very common nowadays. My sister has an interracial relationship and my mother (and other relatives) does not approve of the guy. But then, their relationship is still strong as ever. I believe that your family can guide you in making choices or decisions, but in the end it's your own choice that should prevail. Personally, I would rather go for an interracial relationship because it's more exciting. There are many things to discover and it's not so boring. I am too familiar with guys the same nationality as mine, and my relationships didn't last.
1 person likes this
29 Jan 07
im white and have been with my black boyfriend (check the picture!) for 2 years and my family hate it! my female friends don't have problems with it (most of them date other races anyway) but i get racist jokes off my male friends all the time. my dad and sister make really nasty comments. you just have to ignore it and hope that they will get to know the person instead of seeing them as a skin colour.
1 person likes this