New Parents: Different friends now? Have your friends changed?

United States
January 28, 2007 5:07pm CST
Now that I have become a parent our friends have changed. I mean, the people we hang out with have changed. Our friends that we used to hang out with don't call us much anymore. I think they just assume we won't want to go out (which is true some of the time). It is harder to make last minute plans and we don't go to bars/clubs anymore. have your friends changed now that you have kids?
2 people like this
8 responses
@shoelover (1573)
• Australia
28 Jan 07
Most of the friends I had before I had children sort of fell to the wayside. We no longer had as much in common. When they started having children I tried to rekindle the friendships but it wasn't to be.
1 person likes this
• United States
28 Jan 07
Oh, that's too bad. I'm sorry you lost some friends, but it is good to hear I'm not the only one. It's hard when you had such close friends and suddenly you don't see them much anymore.
1 person likes this
@msqtech (15226)
• United States
6 Feb 07
It is often because you are now at very diverse places and it is hard to have that common bond again.
@villageanne (8579)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Yes, When I had kids, my friends did change. Now that my children are raised, my friends changed again. I think we get friends that have common intersts as we do.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Jan 07
yes, I agree with that.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Jan 07
Yes, I think that happens to a lot of people. It sure makes it clear who, your real friends are though.
• United States
29 Jan 07
Yes and no. I think people can still be true friends, but it makes it hard when you no longer have as much in common.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
29 Jan 07
yah i have this friends that was married a couple of years ago. Before when she is still single we used to hang up together chat always and eat out. Now that she is a mother of two kids we dont see or even chat with each other too sad because i miss her so much. I miss the way we talk. She became responsible in all aspect of her life.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Jan 07
Definately. One of my friends though already had a child so it was nice that-- we actually grew closer because when she had a baby-- I changed & grew apart from her because I didn't really have anything in common with her and she would talk about her baby and I was happy for her-- but it was different. But my other friends don't call me at all anymore.. they did in the beginning but now they don't & I figure we weren't really friends to begin with than if they can't accept where I'm at right now. It's easier to be friends with people that have kids- because all of our priorities are pretty much the same and we all understand if we have to do last minute cancellations because a kid got sick etc.
1 person likes this
@crystal8577 (1470)
• United States
28 Jan 07
Well since I have gotten married & had kids I really do not hang around very many people anymore. So, I guess the answer would be yes. I am mainly friends with moms who have kids near my kids ages. My DH has the same friends he did before. He just has not gone out with much since even before we were together.
1 person likes this
@steerforth (1802)
• Italy
28 Jan 07
I think that it's difficult because, according to you, with the kids the parents can't go out at the last moment. But the friendship is not only this, of course;)
1 person likes this
@msqtech (15226)
• United States
6 Feb 07
well the old single friends didnt want to hang with the social outcasts that parents become so you have to get new married friends. That is normal and good