Would you stay with your lover if your kids hated them?

@rawpoet (2046)
United States
January 29, 2007 11:13am CST
Let's say you're divorced, and have a new lover. Your children say they hate the person, but don't have a good reason. They even tear up or get mad when you leave to go out with this person. What would you do? Young children or teenagers, doesn't matter. Should you tell them, "I'm the adult, I'm happy, and you should be happy for me." OR Do you leave the person you love for your children?
5 responses
@TerryZ (22076)
• United States
29 Jan 07
My sister went through the same problem and she is no longer with this guy. It turns out the guy was a real creep and I think the kids could tell this right from jump street. sometimes It takes other people to see the faults in our lives.
• United States
29 Jan 07
You are right, thats why I think that she should sit down and talk to them and ask the reason why they dont like him.
@rawpoet (2046)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Oh yeah, this most definitely happens. I agree. When I was much younger, I always saw the evil in my mom's boyfriends, but never for myself. I'm happily involved now, but just wondering what others would do.
• Philippines
29 Jan 07
this happens in our family, my mom had a boyfriend that we really dont like and it really gets worst as time pass by because of lack of communication. until we end up seperating ways, my mom stays with the other house and me together with my siblings. as time pass by we manage to understand each other and it takes us almost three years just to resolve this. i guess all you need is communication, try to make them understand that you also need someone beside you and tell them that your love will never changed even someone new come in to your family.. communication is all it takes.
1 person likes this
@rawpoet (2046)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Excellent response. Thank you. I agree. Commmunication is so very important.
@justiman (428)
• United States
2 Feb 07
They say love is blind and infactuation is even blinder. You might not see bad things about a person if they are courting you. Kids do seem to have a sixth sense about people. Just make sure it isn't because of missing their dad or resentful because of him either. But if my kids didn't like someone I dated and weren't happy then out the door for her. My babies are too important to me to waste any time with that situation.
1 person likes this
@michele609 (1687)
• United States
29 Jan 07
That is a hard call becasue we all know that no matter what are children come first. I can understand that they dont like him because he is not their dad and I hope that the dad is not putting nothing in their head about him. They have no reason not to like him, they should atleast give him a chance.What I think that you should do is sit them down and talk to them and explain to them how you feel, and that you deserve to be happy. Maybe they just might come around!
1 person likes this
@rawpoet (2046)
• United States
29 Jan 07
Thanks for commenting. I'm happily involved like I said above. I'm just curious to know how parents think on this.
@seenkung (425)
• Malaysia
3 Feb 07
If I love the children,I would give up my lover . I would try to convince my children to accept my lover.