Just found out my 21 year old son is gay

I'm afaird to confront him. He's always been so senstive He remindes me of Clay Akien they have the same mannorisms. I saw the interview with Clay and Diane Swayer when Diane Swayer asked Clay if he was gay and that did not go well. I feel my son may be conflicted.

I think if you feel your son may be a little sensitive maybe you should wait till he is ready. On the other hand he may just be waiting to see if you are ready.

He's thinking you're not ready and you're thinking he's not ready, how bad could it be, if he's being seen in public with another holding hands then I think it's ok for you to confront him, it's not like he was hiding behind the bushes with his friend he was in public.

I've been a born again christian for 20 years but I've been told by friends and family that your are born gay, not made gay. What do you mean by demons?

Your family and freidns are right people ARE BORN gay they are not given a choice. It is the same as being a boy or girl there is no choice it just is. Some people are somewhat close minded.

what an excuss that has been made by the devil to make people live without giving him a fight for this evil in the Lord sight.do not believe that people are born so. and talking about demons they are the agents of satan. you see the devil is not omnipresent at all so he needs agent to carry out his aim in defferent places.They carry out the ultmate aim of the devil which our lord jesus clearlly outline in john 10:10 to kill,ie to steal, and to destroy. you see the enemy has stolen your child,he is destroying him and he just wants to kill him sorry to say that .you know that jesus did not and will not allow it so you shouldn't because that is why you are here on earth to enforce his will.you have nothing to loose but every thing to gain he has given you all the power you need to save your son.read mark 16:17 sir please do not be ignorant of the devices of the enemy,for we wrestle not against flesh and blood but against spiritual wikedness in high places.do not take it out on your son but on the forces behind it. i will like to also pray with you,and let concern christians praying partners join us we must win

Why do you say you never want to out a gay person? do you have experience with this?

Thank you for sharing

Were a opened minded family to a point I guess there have been comments made that should not have been through the years. His older brother who's 24 I remember would always call him a gay boy when they were younger and I would say don't call your brother gay you know he's not. In retrospect I wish I would have never said those things.

Well you cant blame yourself for saying something innocently like that. You had no idea. Does your older son know about it?

We do watch cooking shows together is that what you mean?

lol, no cooking shows aren't gay. I am talking about some of the series that show on Bravo or Showtime or something like that. I honestly don't have an answer for you but wish I could help. Not sure what I would do but I meant shows that actually show gay couples or speak of the subject

Does every one who's gay always come out?

the thought of my son living his life in slience not sharing with me the people in his life that matter makes me very sad.My husband refuses to even address the subject I think robby has always felt like a disappointment in his fathers eyes.

I am not sure but I would think their is alot of gay people that are very scared and live their life as a secret

you think he needs a mental health professional?

Good response!

You want a frank answer?

Thank you! I'm trying very hard to be understanding. My son has always been delicate and sensitive. We're quite close...I hope he comes to me soon.

Approach him and say what? How do you even begin to touch on a subject like that. And if it went bad what would my consequences be? When he was sixteen he took pills trying to kill himself and never told us why.To this day he will not talk about it.

Actually I do wonder, what is your stand to his sexuality. How do you feel bout it and what is in your head. Is there a reason for him trying to kill himself and remains closed about it?

I Think you should wait till he is ready.But when he does come to you dont make that mistake of saying what have I done wrong?because you cant blame your self for how he feels,and in do time if there is some thing that happen in his past that cause him to be this way he will come to you. but guy people are the kindess most true people and best friends you can have,and would give you the shirts off there backs

If your born gay what would a mental health professional be able to do?

no one born gay.. these are some physical irregularities made a man gay.. parents are 10000% responsible for that.. m not talking abt traditional mediacal professionals.. m talking abt alternative methods like pshylogical stuff.. raj

I have been in my oh so suddle way been trying to make comments about gays in a positive way.

I agree I love my son very much but how do you over come family with other ideas my husband is very anti-gay

Maybe I will wait and see what unfolds as I have said our family is complicated. I can only hope one day he will trust me.

I do know for sure I just wanted to be there for him He's such a sensitve boy. His father has never been supportive of anything he has done. From being in plays to band my husband has called him a sissy boy Maybe he'll never be able to share that part of his lifewith any one

The problem is my husband If you have ever seen all in the family reruns well, Archie is my husband. Narrow minded and has always had his own ideas of what a son should be. Our oldest boy is the apple of his eye a chip off the old block rough and tumble kind of guy. Robby on the other hand handsome,gentle writes beautiful poetry. Maybe it's my husband I should address first.

I don't think he's scared about me I think it's more his father and brother what can I do about them?

Thank you. The dynamics of are family are so complicated I don't know if he can ever be free to talk to me especially with his father being so hard on him. I rember when Robby was I guess aroung ten and he would cry my husband would always say don't coddle him your going to make him a sissy boy. I guess looking back between his older brother and father there have always been things said that should never be said to a child. talking about this helps give me perspective thank you all.