How do you deal with High-handed People?

Philippines
January 29, 2007 11:31pm CST
I once got a co-worker who rubbed me the wrong way. Whenever she looked my way, she would give me the insulting and knowing look. She comes from a well-heeled family and she can't keep from reminding everyone who and what she is at every turn. Most of the times I talked to her she was trying her damnedest best to be on top of anything, whether it be smoking or chatting. I don't know how I should act when she's around. Should I keep my mouth shut or just talk to her like nothing's wrong?
2 people like this
5 responses
@StarBright (2799)
• United States
30 Jan 07
She sounds like a very insecure person who really needs a friend. If you are comfortable enough in your own skin you can be that friend. If she acts that way with every one, chances are she does not have many friends. Let her get over herself. Once she realizes you don't really care about her background, she will settle down. If she tries to brag about what she has, tell her how nice it is and then ask her something about herself that does not have to do with material things. She will get the hint sooner or later. Maybe she doesn't know any other way.
2 people like this
• Philippines
30 Jan 07
Maybe you're right about her not knowing any other way. But I won't hold my breath waiting for her to change her ways. I tried too many times to reach out but i still earned the same knowing and insulting look. Thanks a lot, anyway. I wish I could let go things easily. This grudge is getting blown out of proportion in my head. This shouldn't be a big deal but I thought it would be good if i get it out of my system. Now I'm not sure about myself on this. Thanks for the response.
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Feb 07
Here is the thing... these people who are born into families who think they are better than everyone else, often forget that we all have one very important thing in common: we are all human. I used to hate dealing with people like this, however I have learned to do two things... smile really big, don't let them pull me down. Because the higher you are "bred" often times, the lower you are on the humanity totem pole; and bring them down to my level. Sometimes the best way to do that is to strike emotion. Seriously. I had one girl I went to school with who was so sure that she was better than everyone else. I made her angry... real angry... and yes, on purpose. And when she began yelling and crying, I gently reminded her that it was ok to feel that way, after all, her emotions were no better than anyone elses, it made her human. She looked at me like I was stupid and stormed off. But the next day, she came up to me and asked me why I had done what I had done. It was then I was able to explain to her that her money and "breeding" meant nothing to me. That I wanted to see if inside and past all that, if she was human, or if having money meant that she was above being human. She acutually laughed, threw her arm around me, and said that she couldn't believe I had stood up to her that way. We were very good friends from then on. Sometimes you just have to bring them down to your level. It might take a while, but be patient. Just remember that they have been taught to be that way....
2 people like this
@lifeiseasy (2292)
• United States
3 Feb 07
just ignore silly petty little people like that ,obviously your are the better person , who is she to judge ...Be yourself and just leave her to her own small petty little world she will soon see she has no friends and no one who cares ...good luck
1 person likes this
@dfinster (3538)
• United States
31 Jan 07
I would just be yourself. The people that I've known to be like that seem to be overcompensating for their own insecurity. It's almost like each time they make it know to someone how great they are they have to do it to hear it for themselves because they don't hear it from others.
1 person likes this
@nvtellan (1907)
• Philippines
20 Feb 07
I'll just be myself. If we have something in common then perhaps we can talk something about it. If she doesn't want to talk to me then I wont talk to her. I can easily understand if a person doesnt want to be entertained. Let her entertain herself. I have other much better things to do than to try reaching her level.