When people you respect failed, do you still respect them?

@Jemina (5783)
January 30, 2007 11:17pm CST
I need your advice. I have had superiors at work whom I respect/ed but sometimes they also falter. And then I ask myself, how could they make such mistakes? Being cautious to trust anynone, I find it hard to trust them again.
15 people like this
68 responses
• United States
31 Jan 07
I'd understand why you'd be nervous watching someone who is your superior fail. But you have to remember that your superiors are still human. They are going to make mistakes and hopefully learn from it. And it could be good for you! You could see what they did wrong and make sure you don't do the same.
3 people like this
@Jemina (5783)
1 Feb 07
Wow! That's quite an answer! You're deep thinker. Thanks for your advice. It's really worth listening to you.
1 person likes this
@rana_007 (74)
• India
2 Feb 07
it would be better if u start respecting yourself more than anyone else. follow your own rules and even if u make a mistake u would lern more than by learning from others' mistakes. and there is nothing like complete trust on anybody else accept yourself. just feel free to mistrust people in tricky situations
2 people like this
@Jemina (5783)
2 Feb 07
Thanks for your input. It really helps me find where to stand.
1 person likes this
• United States
2 Feb 07
I definately understand that one! I lost respect for a very important person in my life years ago, although age gives you better understanding...Forgiveness is the key to getting over it and moving on. Trust is not something that is given, it's earned. So when someone breaks it, they have to earn it back. That takes time. They say time heals all wounds...I hope I helped. The time thing is annoying in this "quick" step world, but it's all we got and it's free. There's nothing wrong with being cautious, in this day and age you should be.
@Jemina (5783)
2 Feb 07
Thanks for the word of wisdom. I really appreciate it. It's true that time can heal all wounds. I sure have yet a lot of lessons and values to learn in this world.
1 person likes this
@simplysue (631)
• United States
31 Jan 07
I know myself that I have made mistakes that I truly thought we the right thing to do at the time. I think that when a person goes out on a limb, tries their hardest to make their plan work and fails anyway......I can still respect them because I've done that myself. Sometimes people think outside of the box and the rest of the world doesn't see the vision. What may be viewed as a mistake today could actually turn around and be a good move in the future. :) As long as you know a person is well intentioned, please try to forgive their mistakes. If you think they are out to hurt someone, walk away.
2 people like this
@Jemina (5783)
1 Feb 07
Intelligent answer. Thanks for your wise advice. That's another eye opener for me.
@nilzerous1 (2435)
• India
31 Jan 07
My father used to quote a fantastic proverb: "To err is human and to forgive is divine", so even if they falter at times just take it as a part of human nature and continue to respect him.
2 people like this
@Jemina (5783)
1 Feb 07
You're absolutely right, nilzerous1. That's really something I should keep in mind. thanks for your response.
@cheenlly (3483)
• Philippines
31 Jan 07
if it is in work then dont mind them just do your work well. I know in work its hard to trust someone because some are really plastic or pretenders just to survive with the environment so better just dont mind it. Be strong and just do right. Be good even if others are not but of course you will know when is the limit of being good.
2 people like this
@Jemina (5783)
1 Feb 07
Thanks, Cheenlly. You're such a nice person. You have a strong belief in yourself. Thanks for your advice. I'll try my best. Good day!
@Pigglies (9339)
• United States
31 Jan 07
It depends what type of mistakes. I figure that everyone is human, so no one is perfect.
2 people like this
@Jemina (5783)
31 Jan 07
I know what you mean. There are mistakes that are pardonable in a a short period of time and there are some that only time can heal.
1 person likes this
@pirtlems (245)
• United States
31 Jan 07
none of us are perfect we all make mistakes and we all deserve a 2nd chance. haven't you ever made a mistake. think about it.
2 people like this
@Jemina (5783)
31 Jan 07
You hit me. Thanks for opening my eyes.
1 person likes this
@lilaclady (28240)
• Australia
31 Jan 07
I think everyone falters at times and everyone makes mistakes I guess it depends on how they have faltered if it is in a definite dishonest way well you would have to think but everyone makes mistakes.
@Jemina (5783)
31 Jan 07
It's true, everyone falters. But sometimes when we feel betrayed it's very easy to be negative.
1 person likes this
@vega83 (6346)
• Bahrain
9 Sep 07
Well, you have to understand at this point then, that your superiors, your elders or even your mentors and idols are only human too. It doesn't matter how much they've learned, or studied, or how much knowledge or experience they have, they will make mistakes, they will err, they will falter. I think that this is the time when you have to give them the benefit of the doubt and still respect them. Many times we idolize our superiors or our favorite celebrities and we think of them as perfect, but the truth is that no one is perfect, everyone is bound to slip up sometimes and if we expect them to never make a mistake, then we would be hypocrites, since we will make mistakes too, but won't respect anyone else who does.
@Jemina (5783)
10 Sep 07
I guess I just trusted them so much and set a very high standard for them. Thanks for your admonition, Vega. I'll keep it in mind and try to be cautious next time.
1 person likes this
@vega83 (6346)
• Bahrain
10 Sep 07
Well thanks for not taking it personally, and I guess one way to look at it, is that people who are younger than us or who we are superiors too, might feel the same way about us, and we will definitely make mistakes too, and I wouldn't want them to lose respect for me if I do err. Thanks for the comment.
1 person likes this
@Jemina (5783)
11 Sep 07
Hmmm makes me think deeply. That's really a profound one. Thanks again for the gentle reminder.
1 person likes this
@anetteh (3591)
• Sweden
13 Sep 07
Hi Jemina, Yes I do, because it shows me that we all are just people in the same world. Respect do not come from what you do, or do not do. It comes from who you are, how you act to someone, from your behavior. Respect to me is about that we are different and should accept that. Every one can fail in things, everyone can do mistakes The respect do not fail of that. The respect fails when someone hurt you, or behave bad to you, not just only by failing.
@ESKARENA1 (18299)
13 Sep 07
yes it does show alot about us how we react to such things
@Jemina (5783)
13 Sep 07
that's right. Respect is something that we should guard though many times we can't avoid to make one because there are lots of them really. But sometimes mistakes are done intentionally. And that is something hard to ignore.
@James72 (26829)
• Australia
10 Apr 07
"To err is human...... To forgive is divine!" We will all falter; it is how we learn! It is what we choose to do and how we act after making mistakes that will define us internally and in the eyes of others. I will actually respect someone more that makes mistakes and is able to recover from them with dignity and a level head than someone who never falters. A person's true self is evident through imperfection not through a perfect track record. As for trust, it has to be earned and once it has been earned then there will always be room for "human" mistakes. It just depends what form these mistakes may take and again what direct effect these mistakes have on me personally. If I take someone into my confidence for example and that trust is abused then it is all over for me in that regard; all respect will be gone for that person and although it may be earned back, I will always be more cautious than usual.
1 person likes this
@Jemina (5783)
10 Apr 07
Great answer. You put deep wisdom into it. I could have bestowed you the best response mark but I guess I can rate you positively.
1 person likes this
@James72 (26829)
• Australia
10 Apr 07
Thank you!
• United States
5 Apr 07
Everyone makes mistakes, are you expecting a perfect robot person? Im sure you have made mistakes too. The thing that shows a persons charactor and therefore makes them worthy of respect, is how they handle their mistakes and failures and what they do to learn from them, fix them, or move on.
1 person likes this
@Jemina (5783)
5 Apr 07
You're right, you're absolutely right. Everyone makes mistakes no matter who we are. Good answer. Rated +
@maryannemax (12170)
• Sweden
5 Apr 07
you are right rarrimalion. it's on how they handle their mistakes which make us keep our respect to them. if they fail and then they emotionally fall apart, that's something hard to give respect to anymore.
@djmarion (4901)
• Philippines
6 Oct 07
its not everytime that people could satisfy the things you expect from them. nobody is perfect and people fails too. as long as its not their intention to fail you and your trust you have no reason to doubt them.
1 person likes this
@Jemina (5783)
6 Oct 07
Thanks for your valued comment.
@MarieJ23 (1041)
• United States
6 Oct 07
If it's only a simple mistake, I won't mind it. Our bosses/superiors are just like us, they have their strengths and weaknesses. However, if such mistake somewhat posses threats to me and my co-workers, especially if it's out of stupidity or negligence, the way I look at her will surely change.
1 person likes this
@Jemina (5783)
6 Oct 07
I think I would do the same. I am always careful not to offend anyone but if my superiors are inconsiderate I hate it.
@anup12 (4180)
• India
3 Oct 07
No it is very difficult to respect those who do not respect you. I do not do that. If somebody is showing disrespect towards you,you have to return the same.
1 person likes this
@Jemina (5783)
4 Oct 07
I can relate with you Anup. I totally can.
@marge26 (43)
• Philippines
1 Oct 07
Everyone fails, it's when the one I respect succumb to that failure and chose to not rise above it that creates disparity to the respect that I have for her/him. But failure due to neglligence and irresponsibility just make me feel dismayed to the person.
@Jemina (5783)
2 Oct 07
Respect is gained because people earned it. But if they use if for their advantage they will lose what they have earned.
@lovein (345)
• India
30 Sep 07
Your feelings is the truth. Your feelings can never be prooved as false. Superiers who work in working place/office must be respected as superiers if when you touch them , you get good good feelings. And if if they always visit to your home, they keep relations with your parent. Yes. All may not play the role of superier as per your need, because they play good role as superier for someone you have not seen. What you will do ? If you will not read these words wrten here, you will always respect as usual. If you will follow strictly what is written here, you will change your felings. You will go for searching who is the real superier. What will you do ? Just like you eat as per your own likings, similarly you will chose one option, which gives you good good feelings...... "Good Feelings" Remember........ Thanks
1 person likes this
@Jemina (5783)
1 Oct 07
I got you. Thanks for that adage. It's very deep and thought-provoking. I need not anymore explanation.
@spoiled311 (5502)
• Philippines
22 Sep 07
it depends. i think we should not be judgmental. but then again, it is hard. and i did it many times. i have lost respect on these people. especially ministers who commit adultery, people who claim to be givers but are misers, people like that. and gossips, too.
1 person likes this
@Jemina (5783)
23 Sep 07
That's the one I was referring to Spoiled, people who are supposed to be our stepping stones and not stumbling blocks. Some superiors take advantage of their position and it's just not right. They may make a mistake but their anomalies shouldn't go unpunished just as when their subordinates make mistakes and they get scolded at.
@cassidy22 (2975)
• United States
21 Sep 07
People who are your superiors and your role models are human just like you. They make mistakes too. It just depends on the nature of their mistake. If it's small, why hold it against them. If it's ILLEGAL, IMMORAL or UNETHICAL - then I would think tice about having respect for a person like that.
1 person likes this
@Jemina (5783)
23 Sep 07
That was a good answer. You even understood my implied question. Thanks for putting your thoughts here.