Are you a trusting person

United States
January 31, 2007 12:02am CST
or do you worry that others will take advantage of you? Either way, if that is the case how and why are you that way?
5 people like this
12 responses
@omidmao (744)
• India
31 Jan 07
i always wanted to be ,,, and i dont care give advantages to others it is very important to be honest i think ,, anyway it is nice discussion ,, i like this type of discussion , so i gave u + for this thanks , be happy and good luck my friend
3 people like this
• United States
3 Feb 07
Thank you for replying and for giving me a +. Why do you think that you don't trust others? And, why do you want to be able to trust others? I find I can not trust others always. It depends on the situation and I have what I call rational trust and irrational trust. It would be irrational for me to trust someone just because they are nice to me. But, it would be rational to trust someone who has yet to give me a reason to distrust them and then it makes sense that this trust will grow as I gather evidence to support my trust. It makes no sense to trust someone who has done things to tell me that they will harm me or take advantage or just plan can not be trusted. I have found that if I distrust for no good reason then there is a reason why I do not trust that is internal, possibly subconscious. It means there is something to be resolved with in me. Why don't you trust?
1 person likes this
• India
10 Feb 07
i am a trusting person..i dono why someone would wanna take advantage of you if u r trustable!!..its just more support you can offer someone..well..like you say, if someone's takin advantage to their own benefit, i might not take it...sometimes, if i see no harm in it, why should i bother??
2 people like this
• United States
9 Mar 07
Thank you for your reply. I'm in a question asking moods so here is another one for you: Emotionally, are you a very calm person, that does not have strong emotions of any kind usually, that is neither positive or negative ones?
@shogunly (1406)
• Libya
4 Feb 07
I have trust issues , caused by a chronic anxiety . I can be VERY distrustful and wary to the point of clinical paranoia , this leads to a build up of pressure that eventually makes me VERY trusting ,as a method of ESCAPE (I pretend the problem isn't there ,so I don't have to worry anymore ,irrationally hoping any problem (cause for distrust)will disappear ) .This had a damaging effect on my social life . Now that I understand myself better , I am hoping to overcome and become more in control of my assessment of people without letting emotions interfere .
• United States
10 Feb 07
I have this problem as well. My thing is that I start to get really stupid as I can not pay attention at all when I am scared. But, I always start out trusting just by nature. So, do you think your friends are as loyal as you would like them to be?
1 person likes this
@anex84 (465)
• Bulgaria
4 Feb 07
I'm probably trusting to the point of being somewhat naive (I'm getting better as I get older). And yes, people can definitely trust in me.
• United States
10 Feb 07
Why do you think you let yourself be naive?
1 person likes this
@wahmbuddy (392)
• Canada
4 Feb 07
I am generally a trusting person. I will trust until I'm given a reason not to, and then I will question everything and the trust has to be earned back.
2 people like this
• United States
9 Feb 07
You seem like a fairly forgiving person. I believe this is a good think. Do you consider your friends to be as loyal as you would like them to be?
1 person likes this
@dana234 (2126)
• Spain
4 Feb 07
I think trust is something that has to be earned. I´m not someone who´s afraid that people might take advantage of me. I just observe peoples behaviour towards others first and the n I decide if they are trustworthy or not. If somebody talks to me in a negative way about their friends or aquaintances I know he/she is not to be trusted, because they are most likely to repeat this behaviour with me.
• United States
9 Feb 07
I think you have a pretty good way of assessing how to trust others. Would you say that your friends are as loyal as you want them to be?
1 person likes this
• India
4 Feb 07
i trust for all whom they are really wanted in all the things i trust to give any thing if they needed in urgent i wont appose to forgive all things ...
2 people like this
• United States
9 Feb 07
You sound like a very generous person. Would you say your friends are as loyal to you as you would like the to be?
@kelly60 (4550)
• United States
10 Feb 07
I used to trust everyone to a point, until they gave me a reason not to. Now although I don't distrust them, I find it a bit harder to give my trust after as many times as I have been taken advantage of. I don't distrust a lot of people, unless they give me a reason... although there a few that just give me a bad feeling. There are many more that I will trust until they give me a reason not to. Once they do me wrong though, it is very hard if not impossible to regain my trust. There are a couple of former friends of mine who recently learned this the hard way. Our friendship was based on trust and when they abused my trust, they lost a very loyal friend.
• United States
9 Mar 07
I used to be a more trusting person but now I'm like you when it comes to losing my trust. Once my trust is lost it is hard to get it back, in most cases. Do you put up with being criticized or do you have to criticize them back when they critique you?
1 person likes this
@kelly60 (4550)
• United States
10 Mar 07
I know that there are many things I could say or do to hurt them the way that they hurt me, but that would make me no better than them. It does me no good to criticize them back. It would only make me feel bad about myself for stooping to their level.
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Mar 07
I think you have a very good perspective on these things. How "do" you handle the criticism and such of others?
@rekhum (2435)
• India
8 Mar 07
"The chief lesson i've learned in a long life is that the only way you can make a man trustworthy is to trust him; and the surest way to make him untrustworthy is to distrust him." ~Henry L. Stimson
• United States
9 Mar 07
This is very true of me. I have a tendency to be trusting and accepting of everyone until they are not the same with me. I start out accepting viewing everyone as equals and I continue to do so up to about the 5th or 6th time that my trust is betrayed after that I know longer trust or accept that person. I feel I should continue to accept at least even if my trust is gone...guess I have to work on that. Are you this way too or are you just quoting this person?
@rekhum (2435)
• India
9 Mar 07
I tend to be this way. This quote is actually so real me.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Feb 07
i think i'm a trusting person. i believe that for the most part, my friends/aquaintances/whatever will not hurt me. if they do hurt me then i don't trust them the same ever again. i don't worry about being hurt or taken advantage of though. i think it's a skill that i have developed over time by learning how to relate to others. and even though i consider myself trusting, i don't really let other people truly see who am i. i think that if you do that, that will get you hurt no matter what.
• United States
24 Feb 07
It is interesting how people respond to something that breaks their trust. Some people accept it and move on, others feel the desire to get even, some never talk to that person again, and who knows how many other variations. I think it says something about a person and I always try to imagine what happened in that person past to encourage that response in their present. What it would be like to walk in another person's shoes. I also don't let others see who I am, mostly because I fear I am so different from what others are willing to accept. Have you let anyone at all truly see who you really are?
@babyhar (1339)
• Canada
22 Feb 07
No I am not a very trusting person. And I do not trust all to many people out there in this world. I proceed with caution because I believe you have to act in this manner in this day & age. There are to many people out there who are willing to take advantage of you. And sometimes will take you for a ride if you trust them to easily. I believe if you trust the wrong person as well that they could end up ruining your life, or even worse getting you in a lot of trouble that could have some serious consequences in the long run. Trust for me takes some time to grow. I don't believe I am the type of person who will just be able to trust someone right off the bat. It takes me some time to warm up to a person. I guess you could say that a lot of people have to prove that they are worthy of my trust before I decide to trust them. I feel the reason I am this way is due to personal experiences in the past. When I was younger I seemed to trust just anyone right off the bat without even questioning there motives or intentions or what not. Because I was willing to trust someone as soon as I had.. It ended up with me getting hurt all to often. There have been times where I had trusted a friend in the past & had thought that I could confide in them some personal information.. And I did & the next thing I know automatically afterwards I'd find out that they had gone ahead.. And told another friend or someone who I didn't know or trust & they'd make a big joke out of it. Or everyone would know my secret which would make me feel rather uncomfortable. I've had instances like this all to often & I feel I had learned from these experiences along the way. I've learned to be careful who you tell things to. Because if you tell the wrong person it can get around rather fast.. And then next thing you know other people know things about you that are so personal that you didn't want everyone to know.. Only the people whom you trusted or we're close to you wanted to know.. And instead of this happening to many times I had been taken advantage of.. My vulnerability had. Another reason I feel I am the way that I am is because I have been lied to all to often in my life time so far along the way. I've had people lie directly to my face when I had asked them something. And after the same person begins to lie to you on a regular basis your trust begins to eventually fade. I have a difficult time trusting someone all over again if all they keep on doing is lying to me all the time. I think because I've had people lie to me non-stop all of my life you begin to trust very few because of this type of behavior that keeps on continuing on. I know when I was younger how.. I used to be rather gullible & believe that just because someone was being nice to you.. That I was able to trust them.. But this is not the case.. Some people will try to be nice to you just so that you will trust them.. And then they are able to take advantage of you in thee end.. I think you have to be very careful with people who may come across as nice or sincere sometimes.. Because in this day & age there a lot of people who are good liars, & are good at what they do.. Because they have done it so many times. In conclusion.. I do not consider myself to be a very trusting person.. I trust very few.. And the people whom I do trust have gained my trust along the way.. And have been rather understanding when it comes to why I trust very few & have such a difficult time trusting others.. I think if someone is more than understanding then it shows that they are willing to prove themselves to you.. I'd like to believe that by me being so cautious when it comes to trusting people.. That it's a good thing.. It helps to not only protect myself, but also the people whom I love around me. I feel by being cautious it has helped me to make some wise decisions when it comes to letting certain people be apart of my life.. The only one in all honesty that I trust fully would have to be myself in thee end! . . Thanks for allowing me to share! xx
• China
19 Mar 07
sometimes, i do have such worries. we live in a mixed society, and may hurt others accidentally. if that really happens, i will firstly take a strategy to protect myself.