I Have Never Insulted Like This In My Life !
By ILANEDRI
@ILANEDRI (1921)
Israel
February 3, 2007 5:55am CST
I met a girl online. We used to talk a lot, and she always send me messages.
She is originaly from Poland, so our conversations is in English.
Anyway, yesterday we talked in the Microphone on MSN.
I told her that I will be back in 5 minutes, and she said ok. I didn't go so quickly because I had to write something to my friend.
She though that i'm gone, and then I heard her saying two sentences about me, and it hurt me so bad! I have never insulted like this in my life!!
I don't want to write down those two sentences, because I don't want you to think that it's true.
Anyway, she said she is sorry many many times. I asked her what she said it, and she told me: "I don't know.. Guess I was showing off infront of my friend".
Eventually, I forgived her. What can I do? I'm a forgiven person, and I can't be with a fight with people.
Do you think that I shouldn't forgive her? What do you think I should do?
Please answer honsetly! I'm reading every response
10 people like this
67 responses
@Lush_heidi (994)
• United States
3 Feb 07
First off she didnt need to show off and hurt you.Its great that you have forgiven her but I would take it slow and remember that trust has to be earned.Remember your a good person and dont ever let the words of someone else bring you down. I know its easier said than done. I would take this friendship very slow,and in time maybe things will trustful again. Your an swesome person to forgive!
@ILANEDRI (1921)
• Israel
3 Feb 07
Imagin your self in my position, when you hear someone said words against you.
I'm sure that you will be offended, and get hurt from this.
What would you do?
I forgiver her, because i'm a forgiven person. But i'm sure that there are many people that don't agree with me.
1 person likes this
@shywolf (4514)
• United States
3 Feb 07
Oh, that is so sad! It is always awful to hear someone say something negative about ourselves, especially when we feel really close to that person. It feels like you have been stabbed int he back, and it is a terrible feeling. I don't understand why your friend did what she did, and I am really sorry. I know that you said she apologized and said that she was just showing off in front of her friend, but I can understand if you have a difficult time forgiving her. It would be hard to forget the words that she said, no matter what they were. I just hope that you can patch things up with her and keep being friends with her, if that is what you wish to do.
@cultoffury (1283)
• India
3 Feb 07
I would rather hang myself than forgive her. I would have found hard to sleep for months after this event. Even now, I am feeling hard to digest that, that too, without you telling me the 2 sentences. That is, my opinion, but may be you have a big heart to forgive others, but my self respect never lets me. My opinion is to stop talking to her anymore. Reply, whether you took my decision or not.
@ameryl (26)
• Philippines
4 Feb 07
problem here is not about online relationship,but how you deal with the insult/forgiveness things.sometimes people closer to us always hurts the most and sometimes we care a lot so the tendency is to forgive but do you actually forget???before i always forgive the people who hurts me but again they will do it again and again and again.its jusy a cycle and now i've learned a lot i can say i forgive you but i never forget what you did so you will never do that again to me,im not mean okei but people are so abusive most of the times when they know that your so kind and so nice.so say i forgive you but give them a lessom!!
3 people like this
@ToMuSH (202)
• Israel
3 Feb 07
Man, I think you should forgive her.
If she said it was to show off her friend, and you know her well enough, you should believe her. If I had a situation like that i would forgive, but again, its JUST my advice. Ill hope you wont be hurt like this never again man,
Tom.
3 people like this
@sharon613 (2321)
• United States
1 Mar 07
I so sorry to hear this. Your right as far as being forgiving goes, I probably wouldn't forgive her for a very long time. She should have been more careful as far as her words were chosen.
1 person likes this
@naziashajid (847)
• Canada
4 Feb 07
I think you should not forgive her. She didn't respect your friendship. For her it was more important to show off in fromt of her friends. She didn't think about your feelings.
@RebeccaLynn (2256)
• United States
4 Feb 07
Forgiveness doesn't mean that it's OK to set yourself up to be hurt again. I know that from my own experiences.
You can forgive her and not be involved with her anymore.
If she says awful things about you when she thinks you aren't listening then she was never really your friend to begin with.
Sorry that happened to you. I know it hurts.
@lauriefnp (5111)
• United States
3 Feb 07
I hope that you don't put too much faith in an online relationship such as this one. You have to remember that you do not know the person you are talking to. People can type or say anything, but when it comes down to it you don't know if it is true or a lie. What she did was a reflection of who she is. Take it for what it is. She may very well be playing games with you. I understand that you were hurt, and it's OK to forgive. But now that you've seen what she is really like, how much time do you want to spend talking with her now? Is it even worth your time?
2 people like this
@ILANEDRI (1921)
• Israel
3 Feb 07
I know that the problem is we are talking online, but this girl lives in a near city, so it's not a problem for the two of us to meet.
I want to believe that this mystake won't repeat her self as she said.
I don't know why, but I can forgive to everything!
Even to people that hurt me, and I count those occasions with my fingers.
I'm sure that our next conversations won't be the same, but I hope that durning the time we will talk, things will be back to what they have been, and I hope she is fully regreted.
1 person likes this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
3 Feb 07
I agree with Laurie on this one. This girl really showed her true colors to you. Forgiving is okay, but setting yourself up for it to happen again is foolish behavior.
3 people like this
@Mecboy (1050)
• United States
4 Feb 07
same thing happened to me.
I told her, she heard my real name, she cried and said, okay just for that she gonna get pierced.
Ah man, now I said, why did you say that, and now she showed pictures of her on the webcam pierced. shes in a school nearby.
I prefer an ITALIAN GIRL, than a romanian some times.!
2 people like this
@citizenvin (518)
• India
3 Feb 07
you can forgive her she asked sorry know.. without knowing she has been talked hence you dont think it in serious.. leave the matter cool and talk to her..
2 people like this
@willocfc (963)
• Australia
3 Feb 07
Does it even really matter, the trouble with online friends is that most of the time they are just that, yet one party feels more strongly about the friendship than the other, do you even know if she was talking about you? and if it really upsets you then just stop talking to her, someone that upsets you is not worth your time
2 people like this
@janmar (115)
• United States
3 Feb 07
I have to say that I wouldn't be comfortable talking with her anymore. It doesn't matter what her reasoning was, the fact is, hurtful comments are uncalled for. If you can't say anything nice...don't say anything at all. The choice is always yours of course, but I don't think you are going to forget it very easily so why torture yourself by trying to continue the friendship?
@dienutza (449)
• Romania
4 Feb 07
try to forget those things and don't get that upset for a simply girl who is such stupid and can't stay and wait for you just 5 minutes...that means that she only cares for herself and she's a bad-tempered person who can't wait longer than expected..these kind of girls are very very....i don't even know how to call them...you shouldn't even think of what she said...if she's such an un-polite person then you shouldn't talk with her anymore..as you said,you're a forgiven person,then you should stop with this and you should be more careless about persons..think only for your life not for the others and try to find your close friends more careful...
@milk_shaking (227)
• United States
4 Feb 07
I think that it is hard to say becuase.. For me it would depend on what she had said.. Somethings are forgiveable and some arent in my honest opinion but ultimately it's up to you .
1 person likes this
@ronita34 (3922)
• Canada
6 Feb 07
Ok, Now this is quite a delicate situation because she may in fact be very sorry as peer pressure does happen. I think that she should have been stronger than that though for you! I guess sometimes obnoxious young girlfriends can get in the way of a young womans true feelings but it will be hard for you to trust her again and chances are that you will not feel the same way about her from now on. I am not sure what she said and if you it was that hurtful at least talk to her and let her know that you no longer feel that you can trust her as this was very hurtful!! You are young you will notice in life that a persons true colors come out at times. I know that it is hard to believe sometimes as there are people that can be rather decieving but maybe you should give her the benefit of the doubt but at the same time make her earn your trust back do not hand your trust out too too easy!!!
@kritipen (4082)
• United States
26 Feb 07
Well i never give so much importance to people i meet online unless the relationship has been quite for a long time. If you met this girl pretty recently and she is a pretty new friend i dont think it matters much. I give importance to the words and thoughts of people only if our relationship has withstood the test of time.
And i dont think the girl has done it by mistake. Or i dont think she is taking the friendship quite seriously. If someone wants to keep a relationship going for long, i think they will be careful to talk that way even though they might have differences with them.
1 person likes this
@anandjee (282)
• India
28 Feb 07
i have read your sense but i can't say , i am trying to get the answer , she may be joking that time and after done the joke she may feel sorry, in friendship closeness it happen when the closeness is more close, i think u forgive her, but don't make the friends ship more close at least 2 month so that she may be in good mood and you will recognize more deeply, how is she, you make some question with her what she like, it may u get some more Idea about , how is she , she will good friend with you or not , iam trying to help u , but i have not faced this type of problem so may be iam not giving you right answer, after all she did very wrong with you, i think so, please forgive her , do prayer to get right inner voice answer.
