My turn for a Valentine' s Day rant!!!

@ronita34 (3923)
Canada
February 11, 2007 1:00am CST
I posted a discussion yesturday about my 5 year old and what Valentines Day means to her as well as all other children in her age group. I got this one response that has got me fuming and i mean it got my temper up for sure and that is hard to do for me. This person is trying to say that a 5 year old has no idea how to love. To me Valentines Day is to express our Love and children love and are loved also. In fact i would say that Valentines Day is celebrated more in a school than in an intamite way. Young children may only know the love of their parents but i think that this is the truest love of all. Rememeber that a mothers love is unconditional and the way you love others is expressed by the way your mother has shown you to love. Why would one thin that our Holiday of love should only be limited to the intimate and romantic part of love. Our children are a very important factor to this day and there are many defintions of love. So tell me what is Valentine's Day to you exactly?? Do you think that this holiday of love should be limited to an age group as this person seems to think that it should???
21 people like this
76 responses
• United States
11 Feb 07
of course it shouldnt be limited to any age group! what that person said is just plain stupid! ive had my share of relationships and of course spent Valentines Day with them. some of them were very romantic, some completly forgot about valentines all together. but more than anything else, i remember growing up and every year my mother would place on our pillow a little valentine stuffed animal, a piece of heart shaped chocolate and a card saying how much she loved us! THOSE valentines are the ones i remember. those ones were more meaningful to me than any other so far.
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
I agree that it is stupid and meaningless but it got to me as a mother that was like squashing my daughters Valentines Day. I agree and even to this day my mother still tends to get me a sweet little stuffed bear and heart shaped chocolate. Althouh she tends to be about the Grandchildren more now which is prefectly alright as i wnat them to also have these memories for their own!!!
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 07
That is so sweet and cute...I hope to be able to do that also, someday.
2 people like this
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
I am glad that you think so i also agree that it is cute and i am sure that you too will be able to experience this someday too!! God Bless!!!!
1 person likes this
• India
11 Feb 07
I am sorry ronita34, I am not completely agree with you here. Yes, I completely agree with you on the point that Love has its own meaning, there is not only one kind of love and mothers love is the best love. The only point I would like to point out here is Valentine's day has its own story and purpose. We do have Father's day, Mother's day, Children's day, Teacher's day and all.. Every day has its own specific meaning. So, I think yes Valentine's day is only for specific age of people and for specific relationship like friendship, GF, BF, husband-wife. But it cant be for mother-children, father-children or brother-sister. However, on the top of that, I truly believe in one thing that, love is not restricted to any specific day, I could show my feelings and love to my loved one at any time. I don't need any specific day to show my feelings.
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
I agree with you also on your point and i also agree that we all have the right to our own opinions as well. But am i wrong in saying that everyone also equally shares mothers day and fathers day and all those other holidays as well? I also have to agree with you in saying that love should not be restricted to one specific day so what is the big deal when it comes to sharing this day with children also?
1 person likes this
@emeraldisle (13145)
• United States
11 Feb 07
Considering the tradition of Valentine's Day comes from St. Valentine and the notes that were passed back and forth with him from friends and supporters while he was in prison should indicate that the day is for all kinds of love, not just romantic love.
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
Thank you for clearing that up that Valentines Day is based on Love and all Love not just romantic love!!!
1 person likes this
@Jocelynk (130)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
Valentines day is a day where we celebrate the people that we truly love - Family, friends, or lovers. You don't have to buy things for them, just let them know that you love them and you think of them (if you are far from them). Children can love. Please! Newborns show love towards their parents by calming to their voices and from the smell of mom or dad.
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
I agree with you that we can in fact love as early as day 1. We can love and we can feel love even at that age my children love and know love maybe not all types of love but they do in fact know love!!!
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 07
Jocelynk - you are so right. Everyone can show love towards anyone else. St. Valentine was jailed and his FRIENDS passed him notes while he was there. THAT is why we celebrate the day! I sent Valentine cards to my friends, to my parents, and my roommate will get one, too. I'm not all into the "romantic" aspect of Valentine's Day (I think that you should show the people that you love EVERY day, not just a specific day of the year) but I'm all for sending stuff to friends (most of whom are single) on Valentine's Day to remind them that they're not alone and that they are loved!
1 person likes this
@budsr03 (2354)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
"Wow" that is so unreal and very ignorant for someone to say such a thing. The love children know is pure and true. People on mylot are asking about love, how the heck do i know, go ask a child! They won't give a wrong answer. Take care Ronita.
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
LOL...I agree that a child can give the best answer if asked this question and you are right that a child is pure and full of truth!!! God Bless and take care also!!!
2 people like this
• Italy
11 Feb 07
bdsr03 Love children is the only thing not contaminated in this world. take car everybody
@carmella (496)
• United States
12 Feb 07
I just do not understand where some people have their heads. Valentine's Day to me is more for the kids than anything. I loved Valentine's Day when I was younger, we all made Valentine boxes for our friends to put our Valentine's in. My kids love giving out Valentine cards to all their friends. My 10 year old even has one picked out for a special boy, :) Children fully understand what love is, they also understand when they are not loved. I think this person who made that comment on your other discussion, was just down right mean, and I hope that if they have children, they learn soon that their child does indeed know what love is and how to love and that they most likely have the deepest love for them, because they are their parent. I like your daughters Valentine's, they are adorable and I am sure all her friends will love them too.
2 people like this
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
12 Feb 07
Thank you for such a wonderful response and i agree that this person was mean for saying it and i bet that she does not have children or she would have known better.
@maru_047in (1007)
• India
11 Feb 07
I think so you are reffering to me I dint say it in that sense i told that it is good to conduct that kind of programs in the school and i dint mean to make your temper go up if i did that then i feel sorry for that.
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
15 Feb 07
Oh No No ... I was not referring to you at all it was not you that upset me at all. I am sorry for you thinking that it was you that upset me as it wasn't it was another member and it was not you at all. I sure do hope that you come back to read this as i am not and was not upset with you at all!
@emeraldisle (13145)
• United States
11 Feb 07
Children more then anyone knows what love is. They love with an open heart that has not been jaded, brusied or hurt. They see things as they should be and love with more emotion then most adults will ever be able to understand. As we grow we lose some of that ability due to life's experiences. Love at that age is as pure is it's goign to get. Personally I think the one who posted that message probably never got a valentine as a child. They were crushed when this happened and feels that children cannot understand. He has very little love in his heart if he cannot see the love that others can posses.
2 people like this
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
Thank you for such a wonderful response to this and you ahve made me feel so much better by reading your reassuring words. I also fully agree thatchildren do in fact have the purest and most innocent of hearts and their perception of love is the most meaningfull!!!
1 person likes this
@resasour (378)
• United States
11 Feb 07
Don't let that post get to you.. Remember that some parents think things like sticking your 10 yr old outside naked in 20 degree weather is a good punishment.. My children were always involved in Valentine's Day. They got cards from us as well as class mates.. I like that they celebrate it in school.. maybe they should do that all through school so that children get constant reminders about how we should love everyone... you don't see 5 yr olds running around shooting and stabbing their friends and family and loved ones... I think it should not stop once they get out of the elementary level schools..unfortunately it does though...
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
Thank you for making me feel better and yes i agree that maybe school should also emphasize this day a little more to help aid them to understand love more. I agree that it does slow down after elementary bt this is not always the case!!
1 person likes this
@linepau1 (188)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
Children understand love! They just don't celebrate Valentines day the same way we do. They're to young for the romantic love Valentines day has associated with it. I think children have the better view here. They celebrate love for everyone, not just one person. Valentines day for me, is celebrated by my entire family and with my friends as well. We give everyone chocolates and such. It's about all sorts of love now.
2 people like this
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
I agree with you that it is in fact the children that get the better view. I always looked forward to Valentines Dayfor soo many reasons my favorite was recieving the stuffed animal and heart shaped chocolate from my mother!!!
1 person likes this
11 Feb 07
In this country valentines day isn't really a celebration for children. However I think children can show their love to their parents, even as babies they do this when they start to smile and then cuddle you back etc. Even my 2 year old tells me she loves me and gives me a lovely cuddle. However in this country valentines day is about romantic love and not family love so maybe that was what was meant by the comment.
2 people like this
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
Maybe and either way i am over it but i think that the comment in itself is rude and i will get over it. In fact i think that i already have thanks to everyones opinions about this!!! God Bless!!!
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 07
I try to send Valentine's Day cards to the people in my life, because I know that they will appreciate it and like it. I used to send a lot to all of my friends (as I had been single at the time), and to some family members. Even though we always tell them how much they mean to us, and all that, sometimes, it is nice to say it on that day. This year I picked out for my husband two cards, and sent two of my friends their cards already, and I already recieved the card that my friend's sent me. They are very nice and caring. Also, if I had kids, I would sure want one from mine. And, I would have to agree, about the school thing, Valentine's Day was a lot more bigger deal, with more pressure (seriously), when we were in school, than now as adults. Today, my hubby and I saw a little mini Valentine's Day cake and we got it, just for the two of us, because when you are older, you have the whole month to be romantic and fun...but when you are kids, everything comes down to that one day, in school, when you see who got who what? Who didn't get anything...who is not wearing pink/red...etc...same thing in college. But, outside of the school, it is just your private affair, personal, and planned whenever you want to celebrate it. I believe my hubby might have work, so we will probably just go out another day.
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
Thanks for sahring this and i am glad that you see it this way. I also think that you and your husband seem very adoring and affectionate and that is something to look up too especially on a day such as Valentines Day!!!
1 person likes this
@Sweetpeas (739)
• Australia
11 Feb 07
I agree with you completely, Love has many forms and isnt that what Valentines Day is? an expression of love? All creatures great and small I say, and any age for that matter. Keep on loving and hope you have a great Valentines Day for you and your family.
2 people like this
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
Thank you and yes i totally agree with you that Valentines Day should be just as special for one and all, little or big and old and young!!! Happy Valentines Day and God Bless you and yours!!!!
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 07
it was probablly a guy who needs to get laid and hasnt in a very long time.that posted that comment . lol
2 people like this
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
ROTFLMAO...Well this would definately be a good scenario though ... LMAO!! However the avator has a photo of a woman if you got o the discussion you will automatically know which comment it was that upset me if you would like to read it ... LOL! Thank you for making me laugh that was nice of you ... LOL!
1 person likes this
@patgalca (14664)
• Orangeville, Ontario
11 Feb 07
That person doesn't make any sense. As you said, a mother's love is unconditional, as is a child's. A child is innocent and should know nothing but love for other human beings. That is God's will. We are to teach our children to love all human beings - not just on Valentine's Day either. Every day. Children learn what they live. That is why it is so important for them to see a healthy, loving relationship between their parents. So that they will love the same way and know HOW to love. Take for example a daughter who see her mother being abused by her father. Chances are that child is going to grow up believing that that is the way marriage is and will end out in a marriage like that herself. That is not what we want. We want our children to grow up into loving human beings. It starts at home, it starts when they are young. Heck, it starts before they are even born!
2 people like this
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
This is an awesome response and i am now officially more thankful for starting this discussion as i am now feeling much better. You described this perfectly to a Tee and i am thankful for you to clear this up for any other skeptic out there!!! Happy Valentines Day!!!
1 person likes this
• United States
11 Feb 07
Children are very capable of love. They may not completely understand it yet, but that's what parents and friends and family are for. To teach children the real meaning of love and respect and everything else. Children are very interesting creatures, and are much smarter than people give them credit for.
2 people like this
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
I agree and i think that it was rude and morally wrong for her to leave such a comment especially to go as far as saying what does a 5 year old know about love. I mean that would break a young childs heart if tehy knew that this was an opinion of an adult.
1 person likes this
@Lavera1 (897)
• United States
12 Feb 07
Ronita, I'm sorry to hear that you were upset because of someone' opinion regarding Valentines' day and your little girl. I don't think that that holiday should be limited to an age group either. But this Valentines' Day I don't intend to send messages of love to others I intend to be love to others. One way is by being honest with them even if it hurts and angers them. Demonstrating love and having a life style of love is the greatest love. But the GREATEST LOVE OF ALL is Jesus Christ.
@ronita34 (3923)
• Canada
15 Feb 07
Its alright i got over it rather quickly after i posted this ... lol, thanks to all of my responses!! You are right that honest is always key and should be practised regerdless!!! YOu are absolutley right though that the GREATEST LOVE OF ALL is in fact Jesus Christ and God Bless You and Yours!!!
@AnnaB87 (761)
• United States
12 Feb 07
I think Valentines Day is a good day to tell someone you love them, and a good day to do something special for someone else. I also do not think Valentines Day should be limited to just adults, I even think there are some adults who have forgotten how to celebrate this special day. I have seen more kids in school passing out cards than I have adults passing out cards or treats. Any day is a good day to tell someone you love them, and it is nice that we even have a day to remind us to say I love you.
1 person likes this
@AnnaB87 (761)
• United States
12 Feb 07
I think Valentines Day is a good day to tell someone you love them, and a good day to do something special for someone else. I also do not think Valentines Day should be limited to just adults, I even think there are some adults who have forgotten how to celebrate this special day. I have seen more kids in school passing out cards than I have adults passing out cards or treats. Any day is a good day to tell someone you love them, and it is nice that we even have a day to remind us to say I love you.
• United States
12 Feb 07
I wonder if this mother meant something different by saying a 5 year old has no idea how to love. Obviously, this isn't true!! But I wonder if she meant that a 5 year-old's interpretation of love is something different from adult love. Not entirely, but I feel that a large part of love is sacrificing. As children are naturally "me" focused and haven't had the experiences to see things from an adult eye, they can't understand entirely what it means to love as an adult. So many times though, adult love is full of constraints and expectations. For most of us, we expect to receive something when we give something, as in the case of love. Many times, this can be very tainted or controlling love. I think something that's so amazing about children is their innocence in their ability to love. They don't hold any conditions or have expectations. They are able to fully love and receive love for just what it is. So maybe they can't understand true "romantic" love or comprehend the sacrifices and risk in "unconditional" love, but they are able to love in such a way that we adults can never love. And that is why I think you should celebrate your 5 year-old's love while she still has that beautiful, innocent love of a child. And I have to say that I feel sorry for whomever made that response because he/she has obviously never received the pure love of a child.
• United States
11 Feb 07
Awwww.. take it with a grain of salt. Obviously the person either has no clue about kids and life in general or has no idea what you really said in your post and is thinking wrong (often done on here by ESL people). What do you care? The end result is your little one is so happy and you are so proud and you made a ton of us smile!