February 16, 2007 3:08pm CST
I have been having a lot of problems with my kids and them not listening to me. They don't listen at all. I am single mom. I have 3 kids and I just moved a month ago. I can't even get unpacked. They trash my house before I can even get anything done. The two older ones go to school, but it seems that it isn't for enough hours in the day. I am so stressed out I am not sure what else to do. Any advice for a single mom with no one out there to help? Let me know.
1 person likes this
• United States
6 Mar 07
Right there with you girl. I have one in school full time and twins that attend preschool for a total of 5 hours a week. Take small steps to change the situation. Let the oldest have some responsibility, whether it be emptying the dishwasher, or keeping every one in line. Take a breather and don't let the stress get to you. One of the keys to unpacking is to make sure each box is in the correct room. If it is knicknacks for the living room, put it in a corner in the living room. If it is for the kitchen, well get the box to the kitchen. The older children should be helping with all the childrens belonging and doing some unpacking. I really hate moving and unpacking. Easiest is to put each box in the room it belongs in and only try and unpack one room at a time. As for the mess that comes along with the kids, maybe it is time to go through their toys and thin them out. My oldest, I have started putting time limits on everything, then when he exceeds that time limit, he loses a privilige, such as tv and gets an extra chore. When there is nothing more to lose, his bed time moves up by 15 minutes. I tell my son, he has 30 mins to clean his room, if it isn't done, he could lose all the toys that are still on the floor. And when it comes to discipline, as a parent sometimes we have to be a little inventive ourselves. And I always have to tell the kids, " I am the adult, and you are a child, I will not argue with you, and you have to do your chores" it doesn't give them much wiggle room. It is straight and to the point and they know I am in charge. Sometimes you just have to let the kids know you are not someone they can walk all over. I wish you the best of luck
16 Feb 07
I am a single mum too with 2 kids, one at school and one at home. I find it hard to keep my place nice. What I usually do is try to have a bit of a routine with my cleaning. So before the kids go to bed they tidy their toys up in the living room, and when they are in bed I clean and tidy the kitchen. Then I hoover once a week and just try to keep on top of it. I think you maybe need to chill out about the housework. I don't even clean my oldest girls room any more as she keeps it in such a mess. It is difficult when the kids don't listen to you. Perhaps you need to all make up some house rules together and make them responsible for some of the jobs. Like my girls have to clear their own dishes and put their washing in the machine etc It also sounds like you need some time out. I know it isn't easy. I am lucky as my girls go their dads on Saturday night 3 weeks out of 4 so I get a break. Do you have any friends, perhaps one of the mums from school, who would take the kids for you just for an hour or so, so you can at least take a nice long hot bath and relax. I hope things get better for you and if you want a friend send me a message.
• United States
16 Feb 07
Wish I had some great advice for you, but I don't. I do however have to tell you that you aren't alone. Being a stay at home mom is rough. Erma Bombeck once said that cleaning up while you have small kids is like shoveling the sidewalk while it's still snowing! You don't list the age of your kids, but see if you can get them to help. Even picking up 1 item (ie books, toys..but break the toys up, stuffed animals, blocks) can help. And it teaches them that while it's fun to make a mess, that mess means they'll have to clean it up when they'd rather play. Good luck. It's hard, but there are other's dealing with the same thing. You aren't alone!