Can you be Polite? How?

@Dolcerina (3379)
Hungary
February 21, 2007 12:54pm CST
Are you polite? Is it still in trend to be polite? I heard that american men are not polite at all, and american women do not await men to be polite to them. For example: A man does not open the door for the woman. Are the men should be polite? Are the women should be too? Are your partner polite to you, and to others?? My son learns alredy in the kindergarten that boys must be polite to the girls. He does not like it at all! :DD My partner is polite to me and to everybody. I realized, that I am not so polite to others. I like to step to a room in front of others... But I also realized that the most people are not. When somebody is polite to me I always get surprised. Wha about you?
12 people like this
60 responses
• Romania
21 Feb 07
you re right..unfortunately people arent polite any more . i think is an old-fashioned habit for most of the people. even many things have hanged since our grandparents were enjoing life in a pleasent mode for all ,i try to be polite every day if i have the chance to prove it
4 people like this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
21 Feb 07
But probably you forget about it many times, just like me...
1 person likes this
• Romania
22 Feb 07
i think i did it many times as you say but its not too late for beeing polite every moment you can...
1 person likes this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
22 Feb 07
yes, I know. I try to keep it in my mind.
@lucy02 (5017)
• United States
21 Feb 07
Well as a general rule I'm afraid I don't wait on men to get the door. Mostly because I'm afraid they'll think I expect it and actually a lot of men don't get the door. I live in the South so I think they may do it more here. On the other side I have often opened the door for men if they have their hands full. I try to be polite. I admit though sometimes I don't notice things when I should so I probably have not been as polite and overlooked someone who needed me to be kind.
3 people like this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
21 Feb 07
I realized that if I were more polite my mood would be better...
1 person likes this
@lucy02 (5017)
• United States
22 Feb 07
That's true. If you are rude to people they are rude back and the cycle just keeps going on and on.
@pravda1 (288)
• United States
21 Feb 07
Dolcerina, Here in Texas us Men still open doors for women/ladies. For the most part we are raised to be polite. However, I cannot speak for the other parts of the country and the younger age guys. I think the younger guys have a different mind set.
2 people like this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
22 Feb 07
At least I know, that texas is a polite state :)
• Netherlands
24 Feb 07
I stayed in Lousiana in usa for 6 months and I was shocked at how nice and polite people were there. They address you with respect, hold doors for you an are always saying hello, have a good day.... I liked those people. I now try to be polite like they are.
1 person likes this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
24 Feb 07
wow! that is a good news :))
@KaMlBob (786)
• United States
22 Feb 07
I am very polite. To friends, family and strangers. I just believe that I need to treat people with respect and I treat others how I want to be treated. It's funny, when I go to a restaurant with friends and the waitress/waiter brings me anything, like my drink or they clear my plate, I ALWAYS thank them and when requesting something I always say "May I have_____. Thank you". When I call on the phone, I say "May I speak to _________". I hear others on the phone and they just say "IS ______ there?" or "let me speak to _______". I think it's rude. I haven't noticed too many ill mannered people around me. I do have a friend who treats servers in cafes terribly, it's embarressing. She is demanding and never thanks the waitstaff or says "please". Some people are polite and raised like that and others have no clue what good manners are anymore.
• United States
26 Feb 07
I hope whoever is rude in restaurants and reads your comment realizes that they should be polite. It does seem like polite people in restaurants are a minority. When someone calls one of my kids and does the, "Is___there?", I ask my kid afterward, "You don't do that when you call, do you?" I explain that even though the kid who called is a good kid, it isn't right to be so abrupt.
@abroji (3247)
• India
22 Feb 07
Usually I am polite to others, especially ladies and senior citizens. In India it is customery for us to be polite to others. However the present trend of the youngsters are not in tune with this custom. They are much much inclined to the western, particularly US ways. But I do not think it is for good. Politeness will enchant the person to whom you express politeness and at the same time it will fill your heart with joy and happiness. I expect politeness from others but won't get dejected if I am rejected politeness by somebody.
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
22 Feb 07
I have the feeling, that this world becomes ruder and ruder if we forget about politeness. It is fact. A sad fact.
• United States
22 Feb 07
I would like to think that I am a very polite person. My husband and I are usually polite to eachother. I think that it is important for children to learn at a young age that they need to be polite and to respect others. I wish that more people were polite. I find that while driving a car many people are rude. One example is that they will not let you into the next lane, it is not like those 2 seconds of letting a car go in front of them is going to make them late. I am going to teach my children to be polite and to respect everyone no matter who they are.
2 people like this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
22 Feb 07
you are really great.
@k1tten (2321)
• United States
21 Feb 07
I am to a certain extent. It depends on how other people act toward me. I get pretty mad when others are not polite. Unfortunately that's a lot of people.
2 people like this
@paulnet (748)
• India
22 Feb 07
By adding politeness in a behaviour one can make a change in life. It gives the other one respect and you can make a great relationship to that person. You are right respect comes only when you are respected.
@stubborn (44)
• United States
16 May 07
americans tend to be a fairly self centered lot. some families still teach their children well, others don't. i was taught well, but have spent too many years alone to do much more than hope i can keep my mouth shut. i have a tendency to say exactly what i think and that's not always the polite thing to do!...lol
1 person likes this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
16 May 07
Sometimes I do not want to be polite with stupid people. I read that you drive a lot, so I think that if you are polite on the roads with others, that can be much more important.
• United States
16 May 07
brava! you figured it out right away! politeness on the road definitely is more important. it preserves lives.
@maryannemax (12170)
• Sweden
22 Feb 07
i am mostly a polite person. i try to share some little things within me to atleast make others' life happier, to those i know personally and even to people i don't know. usually, i give my smile to others. i know it can make their day a little brighter. most of the time, the old people appreciates smile a lot. plus in the philippines, we do not address people older than us just by names. it's impolite and i am trained to be polite all the time since i was a kid. yep. i am the kind of person who open doors to those who need a hand. pick up things that have fallen out from their bags, etc. i think it makes me feel good that i have done something right for others.
1 person likes this
@maryannemax (12170)
• Sweden
22 Feb 07
and yep. i do have a very polite boyfriend, just to add. when we had our chance to be together last year, he helped me out in everything. he did not let me do everything. he gave me a helping hand all the time. and yep. he had been polite to almost all people, my parents, my siblings and even to staffs at the mall, thanking them for whatever they have done to him. and i find that nice.
1 person likes this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
22 Feb 07
thank you again
22 Feb 07
Speaking as an American woman, I'd like to say that we are polite. I wait for the man to open the door, pull out my chair, be spoken to with respect. I am polite to others regardless if they are polite to me. It's the way I was raised. I do get some strange looks when at Tesco I walk in front of someone looking at the shelves, I always say "Excuse Me." It really depends on the age of the men, the older ones are still polite. I expect people to be polite to me because after all, I am polite to them.
1 person likes this
@KaMlBob (786)
• United States
22 Feb 07
You sound just like me!!!
1 person likes this
@polachicago (19073)
• United States
22 Feb 07
...and it sounds like me too!
@stvasile (7317)
• Romania
7 Aug 07
I try to be polite as much as I can. It's the little things that matter, like letting them enter the door first, or opening the door for them and trying to keep a decent language in front of a lady. When girls realize you are polite, you can see a smile in their eyes... That makes me feel kinda warm inside... :)
1 person likes this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
9 Aug 07
That's vvvery nice :)
@jurazg (409)
• Croatia (Hrvatska)
22 Mar 07
I try to be polite when ever I can. I like polite poeple so cause of that I'm polite. If everybody would be polite it would be great, but some poeple are rude.
1 person likes this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
22 Mar 07
more the rude, than the polite, I am sure. Today I had to mail a few letters in the post office, and a woman, who came later than me, wanted to stand in front of me in the row. I was so angry! She kept trying. I was tired, and I wanted to hurry, so I did not let her. Maybe I should have been polite. But she was not pregnant, she was not too old, she did not ask me even. Maybe I was seen a stupid
@FrancyDafne (2048)
• Italy
19 Mar 07
Yes, me too I get surprised when I see somebody polite to me, because I can find polite people very seldom. I live in Italia, if you could watch our TV programs you could see only an huge mess: talkshows, TV news, reality shows, every program is full of bad words, quarrels, people who fight.... very desolating shows.... It's very important the education: we all should teach our boys to be polite to the girls, I always do it with my little son and infact this works well: my little son is very polite and kind with his friends.
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
19 Mar 07
Nice to hear! Thank you.
• India
27 Feb 07
Politeness is what makes the difference in every aspect of life. Yes I am polite but not only in words but in action also. Being polite is an indication that 'I like you' & a request that'You like me'. This mutual liking is what life is all about. Otherwise rudeness everybody knows & understands the meaning of fist & fight & breaking each other noses. Surely, no one wants that to happen in this beautiful creation (World) of GOD. Change attitudes & understand politeness & expres in your actions & make sure that others also respond accordingly in the same gesture.
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
27 Feb 07
Thank you again!
• United States
26 Feb 07
As far as opening doors for others, the most polite people I have seen are in New York. Whenever someone carrying packages or small children approaches a door, the person nearest opens it and holds it. The pedestrian traffic flow is smoother than anywhere else I've been. Maybe if you explain to your son that all the kids should be polite to each other he'll like it better. I hope the girls and boys are all polite.
1 person likes this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
26 Feb 07
thank you :)
@Alicet (82)
22 Feb 07
I try to be polite to everyone. I remember to say please and thankyou to anyone, even in a shop. I say excuse me when i want to get around someone, and sorry is if hit someone with my bag by accident. I teach the kids that i work with to be polite, I always get them to say please and thankyou when they want anything whether it's from me or from another child.
1 person likes this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
23 Feb 07
In this way I am polite too, but I do not let others in front of me..
• United States
22 Feb 07
Some people are polite when they want to be. Me? I don't think I am but sometimes I catch myself holding doors for people. Sometimes it annoys me when a person opens the door for me. I think it's good that your son's school is teaching politeness. I must say that American in general is NOT polite. We are greedy and don't get me wrong, I love it, but sometimes I look at the way we act and say, "How can we live like this?" Yes, I am surprised when someone is nice because lately I haven't much of it.
1 person likes this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
22 Feb 07
the people either polite or egoist...
@kumiko17 (18)
• Philippines
22 Feb 07
I define being polite as consideration for other people. I believe by that definition I am. It should never be a trend but a virtue that everyone should practice. Basic stuff includes not playing music too loud if other people are around, not laughing or making fun of people with disabilities or physical deformities, not spreading rumors about people you're not sure is true, etc. From my experience, it seems that people are less polite than before. I hope I'm wrong.
1 person likes this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
22 Feb 07
unfortunatelly you are not wrong. The people can survive only if they selfish enough. I think it causes that people do not care with others.
• United States
22 Feb 07
Yes I'm polite. My partner is not so polite to me but better to others. In my earlier place every one has rude speech so I was geeting surprised when someone was speaking politely. We cannot change others behaviour. Our own behaviours are in our control so try to improve that.
1 person likes this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
22 Feb 07
you speak well, thank you
• Portugal
22 Feb 07
Being polite can open a lot of doors to you. But I believe that you must not be polite just to get something in exchange. You must be polite because you fell good being it. I was try to be as polite as I can, and sometimes I can see that people get surprised by it. The way a think, if you are polite to someone, that someone will fell like being polite to someone else. If only this could be true...
1 person likes this
@Dolcerina (3379)
• Hungary
22 Feb 07
I hope that everybody who comments this discussion will listen to him/herself to be polite at least for a day :)