Do you always put your child to bed at the same time?

Denmark
February 24, 2007 5:53am CST
I put my son to put almost every evening around 8.00pm. He NEVER sleeps then but plays around and fall to sleep around 9.00pm. It did happen that I put him to bed a bit later, but it only postponed the playing and thus falling to sleep to a later time. With his naps during the day, his nanny always put him around 12.30, but with me at home he never sleeps around that time! I figured that he did more at the nanny and needed to be a bit tired to go to sleep at 12.30 so I take him outside a little bit, this seemed to help, but in the evening we still have the same ritual, does not matter how tired he is. Should I keep putting him to bed at 12.30 and 8.00 or should I just put him when I can see he is tired?
4 people like this
27 responses
@icequeen (2843)
• Canada
24 Feb 07
I believe that children need structure. We used to put our son down every night at the same time..tired or not...that way they get used to it. Even now he is a teenager and he still has a normal bedtime every night. On the weekends he is allowed to stay up till 11:00p.m....but that is standard. I would do this with your son..and even if he doesn't fall asleep right away..he will...
3 people like this
@superchook (1786)
• Australia
24 Feb 07
I know he is only 18 months but it might be time for him to stop having naps during the day. My son stopped having naps around 20 months, then he went to bed about 7 - 7:30. You might want to give it a try, you will know if this is what is best for him though. I have four kids and my oldest didn't stop having day sleep until he was about 2 and a half, one of mine stopped at 16 months. All kids are different for when they are ready to stop having there nap. Maybe your son is just about ready to stop too. Good luck!
2 people like this
• Denmark
25 Feb 07
Thanks for sharing your experience. Sometimes I also think that may be some days he does not need a nap at all, it actually happened once when he really did not want to sleep and after struggling for 2 hours with him, I just gave up and he did not have a nap that day. It is just that at his nanny there is no problem for him to take a nap, he sleeps for 2 or 2 and a half hour there, same thing at home but I rarely manage to get him to slee at the same time as she does.
• United States
24 Feb 07
I think it's good to keep a routine for your children. My son just turned 5 and my daughter is about to turn 3. Their bedtime is 830pm every single night. There are times where we might be a little later than usual, but not much. Never past 9pm. I want them to have a good night sleep. I see that my son is a much better child and my daughter is less whiney when they go to bed earlier. Plus, I need mommy time. LOL
2 people like this
25 Feb 07
How old is he? My 2 year old still has a nap around 12.30, we put him to bed at 7.30pm and he never goes to sleep before 8, but plays with his teddies in bed for a while. That's ok though, he does go to sleep happily enough. I wonder if we should drop the afternoon nap too, but he gets so tired he sometimes just falls asleep on the floor if we skip the nap!
1 person likes this
• Denmark
25 Feb 07
Hi there, thank you for sharing your experience. Most of the people I know have their kids to take naps until they are 3 years old, but I also believe that it depends on the children. I cannot imagine my son not napping, it happened one time only, but I think that day he was just not really tired and may be had slept too much from the day before. Sometimes he is so tired at his nanny that eventhough he had a 2 hours nap in the afternoon, he falls to sleep again around 16.00 ! I wonder how she does that LOL
• United States
24 Feb 07
How old is your child? I never sleep nor does my 12 year old son. He was diagnosed with nocturnal enuresis. I would rather be in your position~lol
1 person likes this
• Denmark
25 Feb 07
oh sorry to read about yours and your son's problem. I hope there is a possibility for you to have it resolved or improved. My son is just 18 months old, and I really can use all the advice there is out here in order to make a great little boy out of him. I guess it is not easy for you at all and I really hope you get the help and support you need for yourself and your son.
• United States
24 Feb 07
My girls both go to bed at the same time every night, mostly. We homeschool and work at home so we don't have to worry about being anywhere at a certain time. We lay down with the youngest until she is asleep (usually takes about 10 minutes) at 8 because that is when she is tired. She gets up between 6:30 and 7:30 am. The oldest stays up until 10. If I let her (and I probably will as she gets older) she would stay up until 2 am and sleep til noon. Now she gets up around 8 or 9 am. So, whatever works for your family. Don't mess with it I say.
1 person likes this
25 Feb 07
I put my three boys down at 8.30pm each night, two of them sleep right away. The oldest does not sleep for about 45 mins but I don't mind as he always done this, do whatever works for your child. Good Luck
1 person likes this
@Mamaof4 (222)
• Philippines
24 Feb 07
How old is your son? The reason I am asking is because with my son (he is 28 months olds), I find it better to put him to bed when I see that he is tired...when his eyes are drooping and you KNOW tht he is tired, even if he doesn't know it yet, hehehe. I think at this age, this is the BEST way for him. As for my other children ages 6-8 years old, I find it best for them to keep a schedule. If their bedtime is at 9 pm, I make sure they stick to that schedule. This totally helps them because of school and stuff. I give them a chance to stay up on weekends though, so they get a treat, too! :)
• Denmark
24 Feb 07
my son is 18 months, I try to stick to the regular hours but it is very difficult in the week ends especially to have him to take his nap "on time", today I did like you do and waited to see that he was really tired... that was about 2pm so 1,5 h after his regular napping time... now I wonder at what time he will fall to sleep tonight ;) thanks for sharing your experience.
• Pakistan
25 Feb 07
well it is never the same time i put my lil one inbed but sh eis 11 so she goes to bed herself when ever she feels sleepy but it has got to be befor e10 otr elese she usually misses theschool bus!!
1 person likes this
@anij34 (317)
• United States
24 Feb 07
I put my daughter to bed between 7 and 8 every night. She use to stay up playing quietly in her bed too but she outgrew that and started falling asleep right away when she gave up her afternoon naps. I would keep doing the 12:30 and 8 schedule. He seems to like it and does fall asleep on his own. He will likely outgrow the afternoon nap and fall asleep more readily in the evening as he gets a little bigger. Just give it some more time.
1 person likes this
@kathy77 (7488)
• Australia
24 Feb 07
When my children were young they used to go to bed at the same time every night which was around 8pm they had to go to sleep not play, as they had to get up every morning and do exercises to help them with their bodies to grow properly,but they used to also have daily rest after their lunch every day even if they did not fall asleep but just to lay down and relax. I do think that it is best to put him to sleep when you notice that he is tired.
1 person likes this
@MrsSgtB (289)
• United States
24 Feb 07
I defiantly have both of my kids on a schedule for night time. If I did not have a schedule at night I would lose my sanity. At night is when I get my down time to do what I want to do and relax without getting pulled 100 different directions. Our night time usually consists of getting ready for bed starting at 8pm. Get both kids in their pjs, last bathroom trip, get the bottles and diapers ready. Cuddle in bed and read a bedtime story. My 3 yr old is asleep by 9pm and so is my 3 month old.
@mmiller26 (1932)
• Canada
24 Feb 07
If you're finding that he won't go to sleep at night, you might need to forego the afternoon nap. My son used to nap, but then he'd be up half the night because he had so much energy. So I stopped giving him naps, and he goes to sleep at 8pm every night without issue. Letting him stall and play past his bedtime will only reinforce the idea that he can keep playing til he decides it's time. It's better to read him a story, give him a drink of water, tuck him in, then say goodnight, I love you, and leave the room.
1 person likes this
@Anixie (89)
• Philippines
24 Feb 07
My kid never sleeps at the same time every night. It stressed me out a little when she won't sleep at a certain time at night. But then I figured she's not going to school yet and stressing about it doesn't help maybe. Maybe when she really needs to sleep at a certain will I enforce a regular sleeping time.
@mrsturner (519)
• Canada
24 Feb 07
If this is working for you, I wouldn't mess with it. A lot of people need to unwind before falling asleep so it sounds reasonable that your son needs this time. My 2 yr old does the same thing. We put him down at 8:30 and he goes to sleep around 9. My daughter on the other hand goes to bed between 7 and 7:30 and falls asleep within minutes.
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Feb 07
I have four children ages 5, 4, 2, and 1. The older two go to bed between 830 and 900 every night (unless they take naps-thats a whole other story) but my younger two always take late naps. By the time they are asleep, and I realize it, I am too tired to wake them and try to keep them awake. it always s crews me in the end because then the younger two will end up staying up past 1am, but I have to wake up at 6am to get them all up to take my kindergartener to the school bus ( i dont have a car)so I end up with no sleep
• Denmark
25 Feb 07
WOw this is a tough sitaution for you, and I should really consider myself lucky. I can imagine it is really not easy with 4 children to manage the sleeping times, and hopefully you will get them to get used to a certain routine, because it cannot be healthy for you not to get the rest you need. Thank you for sharing your experience. take care
• Canada
24 Feb 07
There is nothing wrong with routine. Really routine is a good thing, it will help them later in life. My daughter goes to bed around the same time every night and has naps at the same time during the day, I find that when she is off her routine she is cranky for a few days. Children like structure it makes then feel safe, when i put my daughter to bed she lays in her crib and plays for awhile and i think it is a good thing. It gives her some alone time, and builds up her sense of security outside of me and her father. So if your routine is workng for you then dont mess with a good thing.
• Denmark
25 Feb 07
thank you for sharing your experience. I also think the routine is good, it is just very difficult for me to stick to it especially in the week ends, probably because we do not do the same things as he is used to do at his nanny. I am trying to get him to do stuff as much as when he is out there but it is not the same, I guess he spends much more energy when he is around other kids.
• United States
25 Feb 07
I try to keep my kids on schedule, so I feed, bathe and put them to bed at the same time as often as I can.
@aozencom (10)
• Malaysia
25 Feb 07
You DEFINITELY want to keep to your routine. Doing this sets the child's internal biological clock, avoiding messed up minds? .lol. that's my 0.02 worth. I have two kids , my daughter is 13 while my son is 12. When they were younger, I am glad I started them off on a routine, sleep at 9pm daily EVERY SCHOOLDAY. No compromises, no going out on those days etc. However come weekend, non-schoolday, they are free to sleep a little later. A lot would also depend on interval between nap/sleep and level of activity. The sane thing would be to allow tha child playtime outdoors, so as to get the kid all tired out. Then getting to sleep is a matter of minutes. I also think kids go through different phases and no one routine will carry through their childhood. Being a child should be fun, and it is the solemn duty of every parent to make this a part of their kids' childhood.
@imtiyaz1 (146)
• India
25 Feb 07
my children sleep after 11.30 in the night i know its a bit late but they just dont want to sleep before that i come home at 10.00 and then we have dinner and after they play with me for sometime thier mom packs them to bed
• United States
25 Feb 07
I wish my kids had a bed time but they go to sleep when I do or a little earlier if I don't sleep til early morning. They are so restless as well but it really depends if they're tired or not. Maybe when they're all in school, I will give them a 9pm bedtime.