Arranged marrieges!!!!

@sarah22 (3981)
United States
February 26, 2007 7:08am CST
Do they really work? Is it fair to expect someone to get marride without love, or even knowing who they are going to marry? I know in some caltures they have this, but why? Are we not all free to make the disition on who we would like to spend the rest of our lives with.
2 people like this
5 responses
@mzbubblie (3840)
• United States
26 Feb 07
Well being in the US, I agree with you, People as a whole should have the right to marry the person they are in love with, however, being that in different countries with cultures as that, it's expected and should abide by it, Not saying it's right in my eyes, but that's how they were raised. There is a lady at my job who marriage was arranged by her parents and she is not very happy at all..She wants to get out of the marriage, however, they don't believe in divorce...She comes to work not happy alot...I feel bad for her...
@sarah22 (3981)
• United States
26 Feb 07
see that to me is so unfair and i know that its part of there culture and all but i too cannot handle seeing friend hurt like this.
@mzbubblie (3840)
• United States
26 Feb 07
Me either, but when I ask her, she says she's fine and it's normal for her. I would do the girlfriend thing and talk to her, But, I'm not trying to disrespect how she was raised or brought up....It is unfair and I hate seeing her like this everyday....
1 person likes this
@sarah22 (3981)
• United States
26 Feb 07
thatsnice of you to try and still comfort her, and she knows you mean well. one day she might just talk with you and i see your a good person and friend and will be there for her. show her your her friend and maybe in time she might not come to work unhappy as she has you there to talk with. good true friends are hard to find and i can she found one in you. thanks for the responce and your kindness towards a fellow worker.
@Denmarkguy (1845)
• United States
5 Mar 07
Being from the West, it does seem like an unusual practice-- but it often seems to work out pretty well. I do know that in many cultures that have arranged marriages, a lot more goes into "introductions" than just putting two random people together, just because the parents know them. Often there are all sorts of psychological and astrological factors evaluated, long BEFORE a match is even proposed. As a result, what may seem like a "random" union to US, is actually chosen because (at least on paper) there is a very high likelihood that love WILL develop, once the two people get to know each other.
@sarah22 (3981)
• United States
5 Mar 07
thats very interesting and its good if it works out and love will some time develope.
@tinam13 (840)
• United States
4 Mar 07
i dont think arranged marriages are right. u are kind of being forced to be with someone who u dont even know anything about. just because its part of the culture or whatever, i dont think that people should have to do this, they should atleast have some kind of a choice in this.
1 person likes this
@sarah22 (3981)
• United States
4 Mar 07
yes and that true, a choice is so much better and makes things work out .
@greengal (4288)
• United States
26 Feb 07
Ours was an arranged marriage too and it is working absolutely well. Where I come from, arranged marriages are very common. Love marriages exist too but very few. In India dating is considered a taboo, parents and the elders in the family still believe in values carried down from ages. Since the caste system is still prominent there,inter caste marriages aren't allowed.We can't question the culture or the traditions. We have been brought up with these values so we don't find it odd to marry someone we don't love. Love is after marriage..lol It sounds like a funny and weird thing especially when in the West it is the total opposite. But that's life there and we are fine with it.
1 person likes this
@sarah22 (3981)
• United States
26 Feb 07
im happy that for you its working and i hope that it remains like this.there are others who are not so fortunite to your happiness.
• Pakistan
4 Mar 07
iT DEPENDS ON THE HUSBAND AND WIFE . IT SURELY REQUIRES TIME TO UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER BUT IF THEY DON'T GIVE IT WITH PATIENCE THEN THERE COULD BE PROBLEMS