Do you ever feel you are doing your kids' homework rather than just helping?

@kbkbooks (7028)
Canada
March 2, 2007 9:25pm CST
I let my kids very early in their school years that I was not going to do their homework for them. Their homework appears to need so much parental help and explanation, some of which I was unable to give. I would just kind of stand there and think....What were these teachers thinking of?? My kids are totally into knowing how to do their research and homework alone now they are in high school. They know how to search the web and they know how to use the library for books. I don't think I was wrong to stand back. It's not my homework, it's theirs.
5 people like this
11 responses
• United States
3 Mar 07
When I was in gradeschool, my mother would actually "do" my homework for me by way of tutoring. She would even do my projects! I think that's not right, thinking about it now. I totally believe in what you said that homework should be done by the student, and a teacher should give one that the student could possibly do by themselves. I don't believe in the concept of 'homework'. For one, some students don't do it at 'home' and instead copy off someone else's work in school. Another thing is that if they did their work at home, it was with some 'help' (as mentioned). Thirdly, overstuffing a kid with too much homework doesn't give enough time for actually studying the lessons. Homework is not a good tool for evaluation, unless the system is changed and the parents would be the ones graded or evaluated instead. Hehe.
1 person likes this
@kbkbooks (7028)
• Canada
3 Mar 07
Your experience is interesting. Thanks for sharing.
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Mar 07
Thanks for choosing mine as the 'best response'! Truly appreciate it.
1 person likes this
• United States
4 Mar 07
I have helped do so many projects my kids have brought home, I think I should have been given another diploma by now. I think these teachers now days should have to do the homework they are giving out too or get a life. I think some of these rooky teachers get a little overboard on the homework and I can't stand assignments that require parents to do part of the work too. I already have a busy life without getting homework too.
1 person likes this
@kbkbooks (7028)
• Canada
4 Mar 07
I agree. Thanks for supporting my view.
@cher913 (25890)
• Canada
3 Mar 07
Guilty as charged lol... Recently, I ended up researching and writing my 13 year old daughter's speech because she was sooooo overloaded with homework. It used to be that you a lot in highschool, now it seems that it doesn't matter what grade the kids are in...
1 person likes this
@kbkbooks (7028)
• Canada
4 Mar 07
Shame on you. But I agree. They have too much.
@GardenGerty (102495)
• United States
3 Mar 07
The most important thing I learned was from my son's seventh grade girted instructor, when I was upset over him having a C. The instructor said that if I sat on my child and made him do his homework, and helped too much, then the homework, and the grade would belong to me. If he, the teacher, made my son do the work by giving him detentions, then the homework would belong to him. By letting natural consequences take place, my son then became the propieter of his own work, and took more pride in it. I firmly agree.
@kbkbooks (7028)
• Canada
4 Mar 07
Yes, the child should do his own homework.
• Brazil
3 Mar 07
Nope. All 3 have their own computer, and we live near a library, and theyve been taught to ask the teacher to clear their doubts before coming home. -JCM-
1 person likes this
@kbkbooks (7028)
• Canada
4 Mar 07
That's great. All kids should be taught how to properly ask questions and not be shy.
• United States
3 Mar 07
I agree with you but when my kids were little they would get so much of it they would still be doing it at 9 o'clock at from 6pm I think if they are going to be getting home work it should be in moderation. I don't think kids should be going to school all day and then spend ther whole night doing homework...My kids are older now and gave them some help with theirs and they do it on there own and know who to look up things and use the library if your kids need help then yes help them don't stand back and watch.
@kbkbooks (7028)
• Canada
4 Mar 07
3 or 4 hours of homework is way too much. I think teachers should work together to coordinate when and how much homework they all give.
@arvee17 (730)
• Philippines
3 Mar 07
i have seen my best friend do that to her sister and brother. since they're in kindergarten. and now the girl is in college and the youngest is in his senior years in high school. but to everyones dismay and mine, the girl stop college because of always skipping class and the guy always flunk his test and might not even graduate. i can't blame my friend. but partly, she is to blame. she always think her siblings won't be able to do it. so she always do it for them. so her siblings always think that their sister is their easy way out to any home work that they have. this tuesday, my bestfriend will come over to my house because she needs to help her brother for a term paper. and she wants me to right the term paper for them.
1 person likes this
@kbkbooks (7028)
• Canada
4 Mar 07
It's very wrong to let other people do term papers, and homework as well. The student, him or her self should do their own work.
@magikrose (5423)
• United States
3 Mar 07
Considering that my oldest is only in 2nd grade and struggling a bit when she needs it I do help her but what I do is ask her questions that have to do with what she is working on to make her think in a diffrent way and usually that works.
1 person likes this
@kbkbooks (7028)
• Canada
4 Mar 07
2nd grade is to young to have formal homework.
@gauravjm (78)
• India
3 Mar 07
yep now a days small kids get assignments which actually are meant for grown ups so finalled the burden of finishing thier assignment is always on the parents..i feel they stop with home work till atleast 5th class..wat say?
@kbkbooks (7028)
• Canada
4 Mar 07
You're right, the elementary children up to grade 5 or 6 don't need to have homework. It's just wrong in my opinion.
• Australia
3 Mar 07
I've actually gone to teachers and demanded they not send home any homework due to the fact that what they have sent home with my child is not suitable for them to sit and do by themselves. It requires me to sit with them, go through everything as though I am tutoring them, and most of the time, its quicker and alot easier to do it myself. Unfortunately I just dont have the time to do homework with my child. My son spends an hour and a half on the bus after school before he gets home. Then when he gets home, he assists me in feeding the farm animals, then with dinner. After dinner we have a shower and watch TV together where we also talk and spend a little time together before we both go to bed. Other times, he comes home and Im still at work until quite late. My son takes over doing some of the chores for me and has a play. When I arrive home from work, Im too tired to sit there and do two hours internet research for him so he can finish his assignment, or sit there for two hours to make sure he has his spelling correct, mathematics formulas the way the teacher likes them or other. Our kids go to school to learn, why should they have to spend the little time they have at home before dinner and bed, sitting there doing more study. My son has learnt more about life, more reading, mathematics skills, his research skills plus more from me, so Id love to know what he is really doing at school, all those paintings and drawings he comes home with obviously tell me who the real teacher is.
@kbkbooks (7028)
• Canada
4 Mar 07
I admire you for speaking to the teachers about it. I hope it was effective. It's true, homework takes away from quality family time. Life consists of school and sleep and that is not right.
• India
3 Mar 07
Thats the right approach. If u help ur kids do the homework u will make them totally dependant on u, not just with hoemwork with everything in life. And then there will be a day when they wont be able to take decesions on their own. so let them do their stuff , no matter whether they do it right or not. After all being right is not important but learning to do things is.
1 person likes this
@kbkbooks (7028)
• Canada
4 Mar 07
I really like your attitude toward learning rather than just being right.