Frustrated

@Judy03 (13)
United States
March 8, 2007 12:11am CST
I got a call from the principal of the high school today. Apparently my 17 yr old son, who is a junior, skipped school. He just up and left after 4th period. I asked him about it and he told me some of the guys at school were calling him names and he got po'd and left. Now, let me give some history. My son is short and skinny. He's been bullied for it all of his life. Normally, he takes it with a grain of salt and ignores it. But these guys are relentless. My husband and I have told the school officials about this numerous times, yet nothing seems to be resolved. We've also told our son that he cannot just walk out of school. He said he had no other choice. Since the principal and the teachers don't seem to be doing anything about it. So I'm frustrated. Talking with the parents does no good either. Been there, done that. Right now, I'd love to have a not-so-friendly chat with these boys. Yes, my son is 17 and should be able to fight his own battles, but this is getting ridiculous. I just feel kids should be able to go to school without worrying about some jerk messing with them. I'm not a violent person, but right now I would love to whack these boys upside the head.
2 people like this
4 responses
• Canada
8 Mar 07
I know how it is. I've also beeon on the receiving end of that kind of school abuse, and my teachers and principle did very little. My mother DID get involved, and that ended up helping. I know kids should be able to fight their own battles, but this sounds like a big one. If there is anything you can do, then do it!! I know he shouldn't just leave school, but as someone who has been through it myself, I can understand why he feels that he would need to. In a lot of cases, sadly, that's the only thing a person CAN do!
1 person likes this
@mansha (6301)
• India
13 Mar 07
my son is facing the same problem. he is just seven and imagine he is being bullied by girls older to him. they throw mud in his lunch boxes, hit him with bottles, throw water on him and he comes back all drenched. When I tell him to rertaliate he says he does not like to fight with them or answer them back. I keep pushing him but he says mahatama gandhi told us to forward the other cheekl ifd someone slaps you on one. Now I am teaching him that, one who tolerates the abuse is as guilty as the troubler. I enrolled him in martial art class to boost his self confidence. your built has nothing to do with your mental strength. Okay he may not hurt the as they are girls but he wont go through the life feeling week too. Do that for your son too. make him join any boxing or martial art class. It jsut boosts up the kids confidence level as they know they do have the strength to hit but they need not hit. the physical description that you have given is shows that you also feel somewhere that he does not have the strength first get it out for your mind, believe in your son. No one an help you except you yourself and same goes for your son. how long can he run away from a situation and how long can you go and talk on his behalf. today its school bullies and tomorrow it will be college gang and day after that it will be the mean boss -he can not run away each time and you can not fight his battles for him. take action now, give him that push to get that self confidence in himself. I am doing it and you can too.
@mansha (6301)
• India
13 Mar 07
I will suggest martial arts because they are more considerate and friendly trhen other sports coaches.
@dcwike (20)
• United States
15 Jun 07
First of all it is sad to be on the receiving end of bullying. Second, and even sadder, is that the authorities can do little unless there is bodily harm. Third, and, even harder to comprehend, is that bullying is a natural occurrance among young peers. I was bullied, too, because I did not dress the same as my peers, and I was extremely shy. From grade school until I reached high school, at age 15. Yes, it hurt not to be accepted by my peers at first, but, I learned to tune them out. What was suggested here (extra carricular activities, such as karate and boxing lessons) will be a great help, if you can afford to pay for such. It appears that your son is wise and mature for his age, choosing not to fight, and, preferring not to lash back, even in words. But, just not enough strength to not let it bother him. That is if it is just verbal. If those bullies throw things at him, or push him, physically, that's a different story. If they are throwing things at him, or shoving him to where he stumbles and falls, then it's time to DO something effective - like complain, taking the evidence of the material thrown, first to the Principal's office, and asking, "How can you expect me to learn anything when you allow this kind of stuff to happen?" Then document the complaint, and the Principal's response. If that doesn't work, parents can complain to the School Board that the authorities at his school are lax in their control over distractions and it has a grave effect on your son's ability to focus on his education. The last thing any school executive wants is to lose face in his or her ability to control the antics of their student body.
1 person likes this
@mansha (6301)
• India
15 Jun 07
I had tried complaining to the principal office and first thing she asked me if I was a house wife and when I said yes, her attitude was snobbish and she told me thats why I had ample time to come and complaint. If I am not happy with the school, I cna take my child away. Admissions in the schools in my country is as it is a difficult process so I had to shut up and come back home. My hubby gave a pep talk to my son and that was the end of the matter. I have resorted to teach him to hit back at the bullies and thankfully the two years of our stay are over and I am withdrawing my son next month as we are changing city. I hope the other school would be better and as for my son he will learn to hit back in due time.
@luzamper (1360)
• Philippines
8 Mar 07
Relax, don't be violent because you'd be creating another problem. Talk to your nicely and let him the adjustments. What is important is that he should finish his schooling. He should ignore others who tease him.
@fianne (1059)
• United States
8 Mar 07
i understand you and your situation being a mom. just talk to your kid and discuss things with him. you can t alk to the prinicipal or dean and tell him or her about it.