how to shrug off shyness..???pls help...

@meera88 (737)
India
March 12, 2007 11:14pm CST
iam a very shy girl....n i get the feeling that every one is always watching me...i hate going to partues.... wat can i do to shrug off this shyness???
6 responses
• United States
13 Mar 07
I know how you feel. I was always really self conscious until I was about 23, at which point I figured out that people are really too self-absorbed to be watching me all the time. You really have to do something outlandish for people to think bad of you. So, with that in mind, saying "hi" to new people at parties didn't seem so hard anymore. I don't have to blow them away with wit or good looks, just be nice and pleasent. I would just make a small comment or have a short conversation and then try to move on to someone else, or get food, or a drink so that neither I nor the other person felt "trapped" by the conversation. If they enjoyed talking to me, we would usually end up crossing paths later and talking more. Staying on the move and standing up make you more approachable than if you are sitting in a corner or never leave your group of friends. If you just leave yourself open a bit more, you may find that people start to seek you out because they are shy and feel that you are nice and open to talking with them. Good luck.
@meera88 (737)
• India
13 Mar 07
well tats a great idea...ending up conversations quickly n then continuing them if they approach themselves is a good idea too.....
@lilaclady (28277)
• Australia
13 Mar 07
When I was young I was painfully shy, I missed out on so much because of it, it may sound strange but I went to a nursing home and did a little volunteer work and cheering up the elderly people in that home brought me out a bit, I did things I never did before just to make someone happy, little by little it brought something out in me, a new confidence, then someone special came into my life and lifted my confidence even further, now I am not shy at all, because I also know, even some people who are way out there are also a little shy at times...I hope you overcome this as you can miss out on a lot being shy...goodluck
@meera88 (737)
• India
13 Mar 07
yep..i too missed a lot of fun n happiness cos of my shy nature....
• United States
13 Mar 07
I understand how you feel... I used to be a huge wallflower, never wanting to talk to anyone... you know what a good tip is? just talk. it doesn't matter where, it doesn't matter to who, practice by talking. if you are walking across campus to class, say hi to 5 random people. if you have even more time, compliement someone, talk about the weather... get something about your surroundings or the person that you would feel comfortable talking about. Have this attitude... say it to yourself... "of course they're looking at me, i'm awesome." you dno't have to get arrogant, but just give yourself little boosts of confidence. it'll make a huge difference.
@meera88 (737)
• India
13 Mar 07
of course u r looking at me..iam awesome......i wud also like to think that way.....n i will certainly say hi to most people i mett from today...
@mx_aman (2102)
• India
15 Mar 07
Reallyyyyyy...I don't think so...Why you are not going to parties it helps you to reduce your shyness...Whenever you have a chances go an Njoy there ""...Kyoki kya pata kal ho na ho..."" Well, you can reduce your shyness by overcome on your mind...That's the only reason why people thinks that they are of this n that type...So, try to put some efforts on your mind as well as mind capabilities...Then only you can reduce or neglect that thing otherwise you wouldn't in your whole life....
@Gwapako_28 (2142)
• Philippines
13 Mar 07
You need to believe in yourself. and dont think that you are less compare to others. Try to love yourself and just move and act natural. Soon you will get over that shyness you have.
@GuateMom (1411)
• Canada
13 Mar 07
I also was a very shy girl. What helped me get over it was putting myself into situations where I had no choice but to interact with other people. And I discovered that it wasn´t so bad after all! So, why not try something new? I would avoid parties because they aren´t very condusive to good interaction anyway. Try taking a class in something you are interested in, like pottery, cooking, or karate or whatever. The idea is to get out there with a group of people who have similar interests. Right off the bat, you have something to talk about!