I just found out about my brothers long lost daughter!!

@mssnow (9493)
United States
March 14, 2007 7:23pm CST
My brother Steve had a daughter but he was never able to see her. I'm not sure what happened , but since he died in 1996 I have been looking for her. i went to reunion.com today and there was a message from a friend who knows her. I know he was a friend of my brothers. He said she wants to meet my brother. I just cried. I have to tell her the father she never got to meet is dead. I want so much to meet her and give her hugs and love. I'm just so upset i have to tell her such bad news. I am crying as I write this. How do I handle it??
8 people like this
18 responses
@romel_ece (1290)
• Philippines
15 Mar 07
Sorry to hear that your brother had just passed away.But you must be strong and life must go on.Your niece really needs a comforter this time and that is you.You must find ways to meet her and give her your hugs and love.She maybe so depressed this time and all she need is a total love and affection from her love ones.
2 people like this
@mssnow (9493)
• United States
15 Mar 07
She will get all the love i can give her :)
@mari61960 (4895)
• United States
15 Mar 07
Wow, what an awful position to be in. Well all you can do is show her pictures and tell her about him. That's just awful that he never got to meet her and her him. I'm sure it won't be as hard for her as it is for you. I'm glad you found her be strong and know your brother is probably watching and cheering from above. Good luck and God bless I'm sure it won't be easy but you will probably feel so much better when you get to meet and hug her.
@mssnow (9493)
• United States
15 Mar 07
yeah your probably right. I am so excited. i wonder if she looks like my brother?
@raydene (9874)
• United States
15 Mar 07
Hello Mssnow So sorry for your you dear.This will be a bittersweet reunion. Sweetie just hug her and form a relationship with her and tell her all About her daddy. She will know him through his family R
2 people like this
@mssnow (9493)
• United States
15 Mar 07
Thanks, she will get lots of love and I have plenty of pictures. :)
@raheel07 (485)
• Pakistan
15 Mar 07
Just meet her first. Then tell her. Share the good memories of her father and your brother and make a new bond.
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9493)
• United States
15 Mar 07
yes I will do that thanks :)
@twr2004 (18)
• Malaysia
15 Mar 07
how sweet a reunion of the long lost family. Is a god fate to meet the family reunion back. God bless
1 person likes this
@mssnow (9493)
• United States
15 Mar 07
Yes and thanks it will be nice to meet her
@ydnac22 (804)
• Philippines
15 Mar 07
wow...good news that you finally found her. Well its yet late.till the whole story to your niece. I knew its not that easy to do that but im sure she will understand the situation.Goodluck to you have a happy bonding with your long lost niece.:)
1 person likes this
15 Mar 07
Yikes, that is sad that she didn't get to meet him..but maybe you could be there for her and let her know that you want her in your life even if he can't be. *Hugs* Take care.
1 person likes this
@AnnaB87 (761)
• United States
15 Mar 07
I think that you should meet her if possible even though it will be sad to have to tell her dad is gone. I know someone who was reunited with their family and foud out that their dad was gone but the reunion with the rest of the family is still good. And you can tell her about her dad. HTHS
1 person likes this
@maribel1218 (3085)
• Philippines
15 Mar 07
That was one nice to hear that you found the daughter of your brother and sorry to hear about your brother. I think the best way you do is to tell her more about her father that he never seen and accept her in the family and let her feel she was been so missed so much. You have a real good heart mssnow for you really find what you are looking for, god is with you all the way while you keep on searching for you are her angel.
1 person likes this
@zuri25 (2127)
• United States
15 Mar 07
That's a terrible position to be in; there's no question about that. However, look at it this way: at least she will have the chance to know her father in some way instead of no way at all. She may not gain a new dad, but she will gain a whole new family and nothing can compare to that. The most important thing is to tell her that her dad loved her. God bless you.
1 person likes this
@kuttuva (16)
• India
15 Mar 07
simple thing is all is in ur hand .she should be compromised
1 person likes this
@MakDomMom (1474)
• United States
15 Mar 07
First of all, congrats on finding her! That takes a lot of hard work and determination to find someone like that. I would ask to see if she wants to meet with you. You can then start a relationship with her and be able to tell her in person. I don't think this is something that you tell someone over the phone.
1 person likes this
@byfaithonly (10716)
• United States
15 Mar 07
Oh what a sad situation. You know you must tell her, and it would be better at least coming from an aunt than from someone else. If you don't tell her she could continue searching the rest of her life. I would say when you tell her take any pictures that you can of her father and share those with her. Let her know her father as best she can, what he was like, things he did, his likes and dislikes. Share your love of your brother with her.
@sarah22 (3981)
• United States
15 Mar 07
Thats so sad but she has you and the rest of your family. Be there for her and welcomining her will be great. Tell her about her father and let her see pictures. i hope that all goes well and its a nice reunion.
1 person likes this
• Canada
20 Mar 07
When the time comes you will just be you and will say what you feel is the right thing to say . It is always hard to know what to say when you have bad news but we always do it and there is really no right or wrong way to do this . She will know all about him through you and you will be able to feel her in on what a wonderful person he was and this will be something for her to know . It is great that you were able to find her and I know everything will work out when you see her as this should be a very exciting time for you , try not to stres out on what you will have to tell her and just think of the wonderful relationship you can have with her now and even though your brother is gone he is still alive through you and with all your memories you can create new one's for her . Best of luck and enjoy your time together , it is a time that you never knew you were going to have and now you have it to create all new memories for you niece .
• United States
15 Mar 07
Thats going to be a hard one to handle. I dont have much advice. Just offer to be a part of her life.
@Kaeli72 (1230)
• United States
15 Mar 07
"Joy Luck Club"...ever seen it? If not, you should. That's such a tear jerker, it made my hubby cry. Sssshhhhh... Congrats on finding your niece! That must have been one huge flood of emotions that you'll never forget nor will you want to, I can imagine. What I'd do is be honest to her up front, tell her that her father is no longer alive, but be sure to tell her all about him. Since she can't see him in person, she'll have to see him alive through your words, memories, pictures, movies, anything you can get your hands on. When someone passes away, I hear, "Keep them alive by remembering them"... Good luck and G-d bless you all.
@avonrep1 (1862)
• United States
15 Mar 07
I really feel your pain. My daughter father was murder when she was just 18 months old, she don't really remember him much. Thankfully his family, loves and dotes on her. She knows her father through them, through their love and their devotion to be in her life. That is the best thing you can do, be honest and be there. Love her, show her you care and you will alway be a rock for her. If possible spend as much time you can getting to know her, even if at first its just through letters. But make sure she knows clearly, you love her and you are their for her if she ever needs you. I know that has made all the difference in the world for my daughter.