A pregnant belly is NOT public property!

United States
March 22, 2007 10:50pm CST
First off, I'm not prude or cold or unfeeling. I hug and kiss special friends and family when I see them. I've been known to put my hand on an arm or shoulder or even leg when talking to someone. I have never minded being touched in the same manner. Until I got pregnant. I notice it the first time I was pregnant, 8 years ago. I was mostly around men at my work and most of them were like big brothers or uncles. As soon as I started showing, they would come over and pat my belly. It really didn't bother me that much, because it was normally a pat on the head before then. This time, as soon as I told ANYONE that I was pregnant, their hands went to my belly. I wasn't even showing but they insisted on that little touch. I had only known some of my new co-workers a month or so, yet they thought this was ok. I didn't really want to make waves at work, so I grinned and dealt with it. Once I started showing, it was as if I had a big neon sign above my head. I swear when I walk out of my house, that it starts flashing, "Pregnant woman, come rub her belly!" It was ok when my nurse did it... she was just happy for me and glad I was finally showing. I didn't mind when my nieces did it, they are young and it's cute coming from them... or from my daughter. I don't even mind when my mother does it, I know how thrilled she is about this baby. I love it when hubby does it... he gets such a proud look on his face. But everyone else... I absolutely mind!! They are annoying me to no end! I go out with friends and the first thing they do is hug me and pat the belly at the same time! "Ohhhh, I'm so excited for you!" they squeal. It doesn't end there though... they seem to touch my belly every 30 minutes or so. It's like they think I'm a good luck charm and they need to keep doing it. I walk into a grocery store and little old ladies I've never seen before come up to me. They say "Oh, you lucky young lady!" and go to pay my belly. I have to turn to grab something off a shelf to stop them. I went to the library and was browsing through the bookshelves of Dean Koontz and this middle-aged woman came out of nowhere. She streamlines right for me and says. "When are you due? Is this you first?" Is it a boy or girl?" All the time, staring at my stomach like it is going to open up right there and show the baby for her. After I answer all the questions that are none of her business, I relax as she turns to leave. She then turns back and says. "Best of luck to you!" and she manages to pat my belly. Grrrr... I let my guard down... she caught me. As the weather gets nicer, I know that I will be venturing outside my "no-strangers-touching-my-belly" zone more often. I also know that before this child is born in July, I will probably end up smacking the hands of some sweet, kind, well-meaning old ladies. I apologize in advance... but it IS my belly!! Keep your hands off!!
2 people like this
4 responses
@mssnow (9493)
• United States
23 Mar 07
Oh please can i rub your belly too? LOL J/K. I had a friend who was overweight mostly it showed in your tummy. She was always having people rub her belly and ask her when she was due. She would just look at them and say. Probably after I get pregnant. Then they would apologize profusely. But sheesh why do people even assume your pregnant like that. Its totally rude.
2 people like this
• United States
23 Mar 07
My boyfriend has a very strict rule. He NEVER says anything about a woman looking pregnant unless she has announced it to him. His quote: "Even if she starts going into labor right in front of me, I will not ask "is the baby coming?" because with my luck, she would be just having bad indigestion..."
• United States
23 Mar 07
If I was your friend... I would tell them something like... I'm not pregnant... its a tumor. Have them feel REALLY bad about commenting or touching her! Now see... if they asked me... I might let them rub it LOL
1 person likes this
@AmbiePam (49102)
• United States
23 Mar 07
Amen! I'm glad you said it. I have never been pregnant, but this has happened to my mom during both pregnancies. She started to dread going to church because here came the belly rubbers! She is a very nice woman, but when people did that - they were pushing it. And women who have been pregnant should know better! Would you go and touch a stranger for any other reason? Then this is not a good time to start. My best friend recently had her second child, and I asked her what was the one thing people should know about expecting mothers. She said, with an extreme snap in her voice, "That is you touch my stomach, you're going to die!" Now, most people won't go to that extreme, but when I thought about it, I'm surprised no one has been seriously hurt over committing this faux pas.
2 people like this
• United States
23 Mar 07
Exactly!! What other time in a person's life is it okay to walk up to a perfect stranger and touch them?? NONE! If I did that to someone who wasn't pregnant, I'm sure I'd get smacked or arrested! I'm not so sure if noone has been seriously hurt over this... they just might be too embarrassed to say the got beaten by a pregnant woman :-)
• United States
23 Mar 07
I've always wondered how weird that would be to have people come up and touch your pregnant belly. I've never been pregnant, but I'm sure I'd feel the same as you. I'm not a very touchy-feely person at all, even with friends. I would be totally weirded out at strangers groping my mid-section. I guess people just get caught up in that whole "miracle of life" thing and get focused on that warm fuzzy feeling it gives them thinking about it, and then they forget that you may not be exactly feeling the same warm-fuzzy as they are. I would say get a t-shirt printed with some smart-a** comment about keepong their hands-off, but I think people would only think it was a joke and still rub your belly. (Why they would think you'd be joking, I'm not sure. Those hormones aren't known for making us particularly jolly...)
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Mar 07
Oh! I just thought up a good t-shirt slogan: "Would you rub my belly if you thought that it was just fat?" Very rude! The "belly-rubbers" would have to think for a second, giving you time to make your escape.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Mar 07
Ohhhh that' a great idea! I need to think of something especially witty! Though I'm pretty sure most will just laugh and do it anyway... maybe it will stop some of them.
@sacmom (14315)
• United States
24 Mar 07
I never let anyone touch my belly when I was pregnant, other than family and close friends, and they had to ask first or I would offer. I was never interested in touching another woman's pregnant belly, so why the heck would I let a stranger touch mine? Oh, I just remembered, my BIL's ex-girlfriend had actually touched my pregnant tummy when I was pregnant with my first son...without asking, and I did not offer. I gave her a look that could kill and she never tried to do it again. VBG
• United States
26 Mar 07
Lol... I can only imagine how scary a pregnant woman giving one of those looks... I'd be scared myself!