do stay at home moms feel useless ?

India
March 23, 2007 12:55pm CST
I mean not all the times, but it gets really frustrating when people keep asking what you do at home the whole day, a sif there was less to do with a baby around ! I ahe a small baby and stay at home to take care of her but so many times i long to go back to work thinking it would have made me feel better about myself. I know its a selfish thought but i do hate staying at home at times.
1 person likes this
8 responses
• Australia
28 Mar 07
I think that being a stay-at-home Mum is one of the hardest, rewarding, challenging jobs a woman can take on. I have a two year old and while I am back at work now, I wish that I could have spent more time with him being at home, you don't realise how much you miss out when you start working again. When you stay home, you do feel sometimes like you aren't amounting to anything especially when people do say to you, "so when you are going back to work" or "what do u do all day" it can make you feel small and worthless, but if you think about it stay at home mums are; doctors,accountants,cleaners,psychologists,professional chefs, and the list goes on! Time goes so fast when you have children and when I see me not so little boy now I wish that I could have been there for him more I started work, I wish I didnt have to go back to work, they do grow up so fast so even if it seems like a silly idea at the time, take more photos of yourselves, laugh together and play together more, cherish the moments you have just lying on the couch together because once that time is gone you can never get it back.
• India
29 Mar 07
Yes, though you shouldnt be bothered about what people say, it does pinch a bit when people especially those with kids and working keep asking you what you do everyday.
1 person likes this
@rosassj (29)
• United States
25 Mar 07
you shouldn't feel that way. you should consider yourself lucky because there are many parents that would LOVE to stay home with their kids but they have to work...i just recently returned back to work and let me tell its soo hard to let go of my baby even if its for 8 hours a day....its like the old saying "you don't know what you got until its gone!" when I made the choice to return to work i felt like you...but now that I returned to work I wish I could stay at home....you be surprised of how many great moments you could miss out when you are away from your baby!!! Maybe you could do a part time job from home!! Good Luck and enjoy your baby...
• India
29 Mar 07
I guess the grass is always greener on the other side !! Maybe if i start working i would feel like missing out on too much and wish i was at home.
1 person likes this
@lvhughes (545)
• United States
29 Mar 07
i dont feel useless. i teach my children. i clean my house. i cook. first off i dont have time to feel useless. second of all when i hear someone compliment my kids on their behavior it makes staying at home worth it no matter what.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Mar 07
I know right where you are coming from. My husband works all day or night depending on his shift and I stay home with our 5 month old. Sometimes I feel like I do all of the work because she wants to constantly stay busy. There are other days where I fell like I do nothing and he slaves all day.
• India
23 Mar 07
yeah the days are predictable and not so predictable at the same time. i mean the chores are predictable just the order changes.
1 person likes this
@lvmybz (125)
• United States
24 Mar 07
Hi Your are not at all being selfish. When you are happier your baby will be happier. No matter what you decide to do. I went back to work a little over a month ago. It's been fine, I do enjoy the income and it is nice to wake up and have something to do. But, I really loved staying home and taken care of my boys. I stayed home with my first pretty much for 3 years and I went back to work when my second was 11 months. Sometimes on my way to work I think how much I wish I could stay home and take care of my baby. I imagine that I would take him to the park or to a parks and rec class, like the one I use to take my oldest to. You have to do what makes you feel good. If you are not happy being home then if you can maybe you could go back to work. Even if it's just part time. could you have someone take care of your baby?
• India
29 Mar 07
There is no othe roption for us but for me to stay at home. Most days i dont mind also in fact i feel lucky to be able to spend time and do all the raising by myself but somedays it gets too much. i guess you go through those highs and lows of staying at home.
1 person likes this
• United States
23 Mar 07
I love staying home with my boys and I realize that the time is going to go by waaaay tooo fast!!! Even though I love spending time with my kids, I also longed to go back to work and add to our family's income. For me, I could do both by working an at home business that would also enrich my children's learning. I joined Usborne Books At Home and received many great books for my kids and everything I needed to work when I wanted to! Best of all, no sales quotas! www.lovethesebooks.net !
• India
23 Mar 07
its great you found something you like doing and be at home for your boys at the same time.
1 person likes this
• United States
29 Mar 07
Nope i have never ever felt useless,if anything i do wayy more than anyone that has no kids and just works.and if you think about it we do have jobs ..several of them!! We are Chefs,maids,taxi's, nurses aids lol, therepists, boo boo magicians,(hahahah) need i go on? we do alot..and actually people that have kids and work..they kinda get abreak form it all..i know many parents that look foward to there job to get away for a bit..wherte we never ever get a break..so next time someone asks you what you do..just name what i did..if u feel uselss because we are soonot on any level..we are super moms if anything!
7 Apr 07
I enjoy being a stay at home mom.I understand that nobody can look after my child the way I will do.I donot want to leave her at the mercy of others while I am away working,especially if I had the option of staying at home.People do say all sorts of thingds.They donot realise for one moment that having a small baby is a job in itself.A mother's job is the most difficult one.People's comments hewever,can get to us at times.When my daughter was an infant,many people used to ask me the same question.I used to feel really irritated.Many times I told them,"ok then,you take care of my baby so that I can go out and get a job"that would stop further comments.Since then however,I firmly tell people that I am not going to work until my kid starts school full time.I donot want to eglect my family in order to get more money.I have the option of staying at home as we are able to run the home on my husband's salary.For those who donot have that option,they always do go to work.I guess you should not really feel bad because you can always go back to work once she grows up a little.:)