Limited discussions

@GardenGerty (104298)
United States
March 27, 2007 7:53pm CST
I started a discussion about someone telling people who are not his friends to stay out of the discussion, and I see a discussion tonight limiting a discussion to only one race. What do these people think an open forum is? When I see these discussions I am tempted to annoy the heck out of them and jump all over the discussion butting in wherever I can. It just annoys me.I do not do it, because they will likely get deleted anyway.How do you feel about being told "You cannot respond to my discussion."?
13 people like this
28 responses
• Canada
28 Mar 07
Honestly, If it's a discussion that geared towards specifically men, I'd stay out of it. Same as I'm sure most men do with discussions that are geared more towards women. However, when people are telling those who aren't on their friends list to butt out, thats going a little far, and those who limit discussions to one race are going WAY overboard. As you say, this is an open forum, and as much as I too would like to butt in and jump all over their discussion, I won't. Not only for the fact that it'll probably get deleted, but also for the fact that I'd probably get rated negatively, and why should I ruin my rating because of my own stupidity in jumping all over a discussion that wasn't geared towards my race anyway? I usually just ignore these kinds of posts as much as it pains me to do so sometimes lol.
@GardenGerty (104298)
• United States
28 Mar 07
I know, instead of jumping in, I come and complain to my friends and see what they think or if I am just overreacting. Good support here.
• Philippines
28 Mar 07
Defenitely it will annoy me especially if I have somthing to say witht the topic. As far as my time here I havent seen any discussion that limits me only those that limits with gender. What is the link of that dicussion maybe i can annoy that user..lol.
2 people like this
28 Mar 07
My understanding of an open forum is that anyone can participate. However, I would probably be more likely to ignore it as a pointless exercise.
2 people like this
• United States
28 Mar 07
I haven't seen the discussions you are talking about but I would have felt the same way you did, I'm sure. It is a public forum though so it can go both ways, I guess. Doesn't mean it wasn't rude for them to word it that way - I suppose we can look at the bright side.. who wants to join a discussion like that anyhow? By making their title very clear like that - it makes my job alot easier when picking and choosing what discussions I want to reply to. It's their loss because they are limiting the number of replies they will get and in return limiting how much money they can make. I have to wonder, how would they like it if the roles were reversed and someone started a discussion that specifically excluded their race and it was said clearly in the discussion title? I'm sure they wouldn't like it either. Sometimes people need to remember the Golden Rule of treating others the way you want to be treated.
2 people like this
@wildhorse (1293)
• Egypt
28 Mar 07
I haven't seen this so far but i think it should be against mylot guidelines, there should be no discrimination if someone wants to participate and has something to say, I saw question/topics concerning ladies only and I don't post in them but they don't say "men stay out" it's just not of our concerns and they don't have to say it, even if someone posted something useful or related they would not mind (I think).
• Pakistan
28 Mar 07
well its not a good idea because every one should have chance ro reply
2 people like this
@ironstruck (2299)
• Canada
28 Mar 07
People say they like mylot because it is so friendly and people interact etc. etc. However, this is the other side of that argument. This will happen every time. It is just like a bunch of school kids. They form their own little clicquey groups an use mylot for their own selfish gathering place. This is NOT a chat site. This is a site for people to earn a little money. As soon as it is turned into something more, someone will ruin it. Stay impartial, go about your business and forget about the friend thing on mylot or join a chat site where you can start your own little ethnic group.
2 people like this
@Mickie30 (2633)
28 Mar 07
Yes I know what you mean that annoys me also. This is an open website for all types of people and not limited to just one person. It is interesting to get views from all types of different people and by only allowing certain people to post you are getting a false view of a limited user. On the otherhand the reason why people might do this is actually for more posts because they know it raises anger in people so they will respond.
2 people like this
• Canada
28 Mar 07
Sorry, but I am not insulted in the slightest. I figure they have their reasons. I saw a discussion last night limiting the responses to one culture, so I was curious and went in and read it. It turned out that the person's culture had been very rudely insulted by someone of another culture and she needed to rant. I didn't blame her at all. Actually, I entered the discussion to let her know that just because some people are really rude idiots doesn't mean that we are all that way and that I totally understood her anger. The lady is really a wonderful person and has written some beautiful posts. Why should I judge her? That is not my position in life. You are free to enter any discussion, you know, but you must enter them with an open heart, not an angry one. When people have started a discussion with that sort of disclaimer, you must know that there is a reason for their anger. Try and understand why they are angry and see what you can do or say that might help. Getting angry at them only perpetuates the problems. My opinion.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (104298)
• United States
28 Mar 07
Your opinion is well stated, and I am not angry, but I am a little hurt. I do not think we are talking about the same post, but I can understand that some people are rude here, and all over the world, sometimes. I have put my two cents worth in to tell people that prejudice and racism is not right. I have been treated scornfully for that opinion. I love the diversity, and I do not feel that limiting discussions to one race or another is going to solve those problems.
• Canada
29 Mar 07
I am terribly sorry if I have hurt you in any way. That was definitely not my intention. Please realize, as well, that I was not calling you rude; I was talking about some of the comments I read in another discussion. I fully understand why you are upset. I was just trying, in my rather clumsy way, to let you know why one discussion had opted to be selective about its posters. I am sure there are many discussions that do the same thing and I am sure they all have their own reasons for doing so. I was talking about the one I happened to see. I honestly cannot comment on any others. Again, I humbly apologize if I have offended you in any way.
1 person likes this
• Canada
29 Mar 07
I am honoured to have you as a friend.
1 person likes this
@MsTickle (24994)
• Australia
28 Mar 07
I find a couple of problems in this vein, some posts are directed at a certain race excluding others. How many times have I read a post that I'm unable to comment on because it pertains to a certain country. Then there is the guy who is the same nationality as me saying..."In my country the situation is this...blah, blah. What's this situation like in your country?" Hello, how am I supposed to respond to this? It really gets up my nose.
@GardenGerty (104298)
• United States
29 Mar 07
When I respond to the ones that talk about my country, I just say, "In my part of the country" or "where I live, we do such and such" it is harder, and more awkward. Ms. Tickle, I like some of your turns of expression.
@yanjiaren (9050)
28 Mar 07
Well we all know that even in a democracy lol..there are abuses of the system.I see some discussions too and I cannot answer them cos I am not the right race.I made one about hunting for some Chinese friends yesterday as I have a common interest but I never limited it to any one answering..on the contrary some of my friends responded and I was elated and it turned out I was ending up teaching them chinese phrases and I had such a laugh lol..it really gave me a boost..so I like to be open to every one..That is waht mylot should be all about..but unfortunately some people are not so brave to come out of their comfort zone which is quite sad because we all have so much to learn from each other..and to give each other..Any way you are always welcome in my discussions..I like a big party lol..you are a great friend..
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (104298)
• United States
28 Mar 07
I saw your discussion, but I do not know how to make Chinese dumplings, so I did not post. I thought it was great that you really want to learn how to do this. I guess I just regarded that discussion as a cooking discussion,I did not feel left out, but I knew that you would not want me to post "I don't Know"
• Ireland
28 Mar 07
I would find this very offensive to the rest of the members on myLot and I feel sure that it is against the rules. I wouldn't even get involved in this discussion, as like you say, I am sure it will become very heated will most likely be deleted.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (104298)
• United States
28 Mar 07
I do not know, maybe I just do not like to set up divisions here. Guys and Girls still include wide ranges of people. A discussion that says only "certain nationality" reply, is still a big Keep Out sign to me, and it felt rude. The same discussion could have been phrased differently for the same result. I got the impression that the idea was "Have you been treated badly because of your nationality?" Maybe I was wrong.
@applsofgld (2506)
• United States
29 Mar 07
I won't waste my time responding to someone who limits their discussion, it's their loss anyway. They don't get my opinion nor do they make any money off of it. If they repeatedly do it, I will delete them as my friend.
@jennybianca (12914)
• Australia
29 Mar 07
This is silly. My Lot is for everyone. There is not meant to be any restrictions on race, or friendships. I have seen a disccusion where I have been told not to join in, or received notification from any of my friends.If I did, I would be likely to butt in. I bet a lot of other people do.
• Singapore
28 Mar 07
Nah, I don't think this is right. This *is* an open forum. All should be entitled to a voice.
1 person likes this
• United States
28 Mar 07
That is horrible, I would not have been able to contain myself and I would have responded and then reported them to myLot, surely that is against myLot policy (seems like most things of this nature are). Hopefully you did respond with something, what does that person think that they are "MyLot God" and they can rule who responds to their discussion?? Last time I checked it was a free world and free speach. Thanks for letting me vent, so glad I didnt' see that discussion. ~ Take Care ~
1 person likes this
@Eskimo (2317)
28 Mar 07
I am not sure if there are any rules about this, but I don't think limiting discussions to specific people is a good thing, and if it is limited to one specific race, then could be considered racist. Why would anyone want to restrict discussions anyway? I would probably just not respond to any of that person's discussions - ever!! or possibly just pop in and respond anyway to see what happens, however I would not like to upset them so much that they would start a vendetta against me. You could always give them a - rating or report them to MyLot as well.
1 person likes this
• United States
28 Mar 07
LOL I would be tempted to annoy them too but it would really only ruin our reputations instead of theirs. I would just rate them negatively and let them go on their way.
1 person likes this
• Canada
28 Mar 07
Now that I think of it, I too have come across this person before. I also didn't like their point of view or way of expression. I think what this person's goal was to entice you enough to make a response. whether It was respond on their discussion or to make some sort of rebuttal somewhere else... like here! Ultimate their view didn't help them at all except to raise awareness and discussion. You're right for raising such a discussion. this person should not be rewarded for their points of view nor should they eliminate other by the colour of their skin. It's really disgusting for that sort of mindset. It doesn't solve problems, It creates more problems. Even if we were to answer their discussion what would they gain from that except to gain a bad reputation, a loss of point/ earnings. If I was told that I could respond to their discussion. I would do it anyways they're not the one's that pay me to respond,.. mylot does! If anyone chooses to respond to this guy/ gals discussion they make earnings. the one put that discussion up in the first place doesn't gain anything except a reputation, which of course is a bad one. Think of how detailed your response would be as well.. can you say money!
1 person likes this
@mgoefry (40)
• Malaysia
28 Mar 07
i agree with you, people who want to discuss thing among their race should open their own private discussion room. this is democracy world, anybody can give opinion on any topic that he wanted to, but within several limits. why should have limitation, open up minds guys. welcome to real world.
1 person likes this