Is my sister jealous of me or I am jealous of her....
March 29, 2007 3:20pm CST
Ok, I know that this might sound ridiculous, but I need some advice on it... Last year, my husband was fired from his job because he attended a month long inpatient treatment center to battle his alcoholism. Just as of recently he has taken his past employer to court for wrongful dismissial. He won, and now, we are looking at getting a hefty settlement. We are currently expecting our third child, and feel that we should use this money towards a newer, and bigger vehicle. When I was discussing with my sister what kind of vechiles we had been looking at, she ripped me a new bumhole, told me that I didnt know how to spend money wisely, and then repeatedly yelled in the phone, that I was jealous of her. Quite frankly, I am the furthest thing from it. Yes, our marriage hasnt been easy, but we are human. I have two beauitful boys, I live relatively comfortably, and I have a great job... Is she the one who is jealous of me, or I am I jealous of her, and jusy cant find away to admit it...
2 people like this
29 Mar 07
It's hard when we hope people will be happy for us - and then they aren't. I'm sure there are many reasons why she reacted that way to your discussion, Saskmommy. Sure, she might be jealous that you're looking at a new vehicle... but, if she's saying you're jealous of HER, then I'm thinking that there's more than jealousy there. It's possible that she is not necessarily jealous but angry that you're getting something nice with what she might view as "free money." Your husband had to go through a difficult time (both in treatment and in court, I'm sure) to get that settlement but maybe your sister can only see that you're getting something that you "didn't work for"... I know a LOT of people like that. If you receive an inheritance, for example, and do something nice with it, they are upset because, if they wanted to do the same, no one would be "giving them" the money, you know? Then again, if you want to try to put this in a more positive light, maybe your sister just thought that you should be setting aside that money to get things for your new baby or to set up education savings for all of your children. Maybe she figures that the vehicle you have is fine right now and she was surprised that you weren't doing something else with the settlement. I remember, when I was with my ex, we got a mini-van. Some of his relatives came to our home for a party and it was parked in the driveway. One of them asked, "Who's van is that???" and, when I said it was ours, she just let out a sarcastic, "oh REALLY!!" and walked away in a huff. She was annoyed the whole day... and it was only because she wanted her husband to get them a van but she wanted it to be a company vehicle so they didn't have to pay for it. He wasn't successful in getting one but, somehow, she was mad at us for getting one that we had to pay for! There are just people who have trouble being happy for anyone else. (She reacted the same way when we bought a house and they were living in an apartment... the attitude really got old!) All in all, it's your husband's settlement and it's a decision to be made under your own roof as to how you spend it. You're pregnant and you don't need the stress of arguing with your sister. If you can, I'd say just let it go and be happy with whatever you decide. Good luck with it... and with your new addition :)
• United States
29 Mar 07
Well, you didn't give any reasons to why you would be jelous of her... So I dont see how you are jelous of her.. And maybe she was just having a rough day when you told her about getting a new car and she took it out on you. I don't know.. Of what you are asking I would have to say that your sister is jelous of you becuase you are getting a new car.
• United States
29 Mar 07
Well to start sisters are very competitive anyways and it sounds like you are close in age to still be arguing over such minor events in your lives. Whether she is jealous of you are she thinks you are jealous of her it does not matter what matters is that you are happy with your life and doing what pleases you. Always remember you cannot change that you don't control and the best we can do is accept that you will not agree on this issue and move on. Your sister will always be your sister and sometimes you will not agree on issues, but what will always be the same is that your love for her cause no matter what she will always be your sister. ~ Take Care ~