Are you this kind of friend, do you have these kinds of friends

New Friends - When you meet a new person, you stop to ask yourself all kinds of questions about why, how and why not? You have to judge how that person will add joy to your life. You have to figure out if that person will add value to your life. But when you come right down to it, you get a feeling down deep in your soul, that is a person you can love. And one that will love you in return.
United States
March 31, 2007 5:35pm CST
In the play Les Miserables, near the end Jean Valjean says "to love another person is to see the face of God." WOW!! Everytime I heard that, I would stop the CD and think, what a wonderful saying. I think loving a person is not an easy thing to do. Now I don't mean as a lover or a spouse. I mean as a friend, as person you will drop what you are doing to be there for them. When you meet a new person, you stop to ask yourself all kinds of questions about why, how and why not? You have to judge how that person will add joy to your life. You have to figure out if that person will add value to your life. But when you come right down to it, you get a feeling down deep in your soul, that is a person you can love. And one that will love you in return. The beauty that comes with making friends, is that it brings trust, love and loyalty. You pick a friend that listens, stops and listens. You pick a friend that lets you talk and waits until you are done, before they offer advice. You pick a friend that makes you laugh and lets you cry. You are the kind of friend that offers to lend a hand and a heart. You don't judge your friend on what they do or how much money they have. You want them to be your friend, because they know the end of your sentence before you finished it. Your friend will call you, when your are thinking about them. They know when you need them before your ask them. You don't have to send birthday cards to tell them how much you treasure them. On Christmas you don't have to buy them a present, because it is your friendship they value. This friend will wait by the phone for you to call with news that you are OK. You will take your friend to the doctor, when they are afraid to go alone. You share a double hot fudge sundae the day before the diet starts. When they go on the patch to quite smoking, you buy gourmet lolly pops, to take the place of cigarettes. You know their favorite color and they know your children's names. You have told them things that you never had the nerve to say out loud, and they never told a soul. If you tell your friend that you want to see the ocean for your birthday, she reserves a beach front hotel for you and her. When she gets a divorce, you help with the paper work, and never say a bad word about her choice of men. She sits with a sick family member, so you can get some sleep. Your friend can be a man or a women. A spiritual bond is formed. Something that will last for all time. You have misunderstandings, words and right out yelling matches. But you heart is lonely without your friend. In each life we are lucky if we are blessed with one or two best friends. I have 3, one is in Arizona, one in North Carolina and one here in Florida. There are from different times in my lifes. The one is Arizona is Linda, we both were young wives, in 1965 in New Jersey. We had our first sons together. She moved on to Arizona and we lost touch for over 20 years, she is back in my life and we speak almost daily by e-mail. The one from North Carolina is Fran, she and I became friends in New Jersey as well. We have been friends for over 23 years. We only see each once a year. but she is as near as a phone call in the middle of the night. We have been there for each other during some really frighten times. Sometimes it was me that leaned on her, and sometimes she was leaning on me. My Florida friend is Barbara, we have known each other 2 years this month. She gives me more than I deserve, and I love her more than is possible. She showed me the way back to me, and I showed her she is someone that should be proud of all she has accomplished. I was an only child, and never learned to share. I never really had much to share to start off with. The friends I met along the way brought out the best of me, and gave me the best of them. They didn't care that I was heavy, changed my hair color weekly or couldn't drive. I didn't mind that they were wise, funny and generous. We would and still do, sit together and laugh one minute and cry the next 5 minutes. They have problems that they could only share with me, their inner feelings was laid on my heart and we prayed together. I asked for advice from them and they were honest and fair. Each one of them gave me something so precious, their time, their attention and their whole heart. In them I see Godliness. In me they see hopefulness. While doing my column, I have met friends, that filled my heart with joy. I have seen unselfish acts by on-line friends. We have called hospital rooms in different states checking on their family. We started prayer groups. We tracked down missing buddies, if they were not on line in a week or so. We celebrated births, and weddings. We mourned for deaths and losses. We have talked on the phone, in Instants mail, in chat rooms and in person. We let dinner grow cold to give friendly ear. We have kept secrets. We rejoice in happiness and feel deep despair in sadness. We have had parties on AOL. A bridal shower, and Christmas in July were on line between friends that will still be friends in the next century. We tried to save TV shows, children's lives, and each others sanity. We bring jokes, poems and true stories to each other. We encourage and share faith. We send notes and gifts to each other because we are part of one wonderful world. What we see in each other is Kindness, Goodness, Forgiveness and Faithfulness. "To Love Another Person Is To See The Face Of God." Carolee Kaufold "may be reprinted with proper credit"
2 people like this
17 responses
@open4you (54)
• Romania
1 Apr 07
love that book, Victor Hugo is a great author, and the movie with Gerard Depardieu as Jean Valjean
1 person likes this
• India
1 Apr 07
That was a lot of prose about friends. But how many people in this materialistic world can hope to be a good friend, where people too busy to spare even a thought to a friend. But if you really get a good friend, that is indeed golden luck
@katyzzz (2902)
• Australia
1 Apr 07
It sounds great but i don't think it is true, fact and fiction rarely come together.
1 person likes this
• United States
1 Apr 07
it is true I lived it
@youdontsay (3503)
• United States
1 Apr 07
You ARE blessed. But, then, you are a good friend and that pretty much insures you'll have people in your life who are good friends. I don't make friends easily. I'm pretty independent and introverted. But once I have developed a close friendship it usually is a lifetime friendship. For me friendship is built on trust. And in order to trust you have to take risks with a person to build that trust. I love the quote. It sums up the great command to love. When you see God in other people you have to love them if you love God. That doesn't necessarily mean you will be friends, though. We are asked to love everyone, even our enemies, because God is in all. Certainly not an easy commandment.
• China
1 Apr 07
your words touched me deeply.sometimes I think I should do something for my friends, my family and all people I love.but sometimes I hope my friends do something for me.maybe friendsip is not take and offer. Friend is someone you can lean on no matter in good times or bad times.the sentence "TO Love another person is to see the face of God",I like it very much.it makes my heart warm. I know I lost some friends ,I don't know the reason.maybe the cause is me.just don't keep touch with each other,for long,you and your friends will feel you have nothing to talk with each other.there is something between your friend and you.Gradually, you lost each other,what a pity!I think I should take this sentence in my mind.just trust love,tust the people you love and the peole love you.don't wait your lose them, and then you remind yourself you should cherish ,that's too late.
1 person likes this
@hestee (250)
• Nigeria
1 Apr 07
From your post( the most inspiring i have come across) your personality screams out for good to all mankind. Remember my PM to you i wasn't kidding. Whatever you pen oozes kindness and compassion and understanding and empathy to those who are fortunate to read them.You have brought love and life to mylot. Do keep up the good work.
1 person likes this
@liranlgo (5743)
• Israel
1 Apr 07
beautiful and so right!!!!! i do feel the same way that you do carolee and i do have those best loved friends that i traet similiar to what you wrote and they treat me the same way. you wrote a sensitive beautiful post:) thank you
@charms88 (7546)
• Philippines
1 Apr 07
Yes carolee. I think I've been forever giving my unending support and love to all my friends. They can holler me anytime they like. I will rightly hop in to their side if they needed me. I'm also blessed to have few close friends who never failed to help me too. It is a two way of giving and taking. We don't need to constantly called each other because we know we can easily reach each other anytime. We can read each other's minds very well. Thanks for sharing. :)
• India
1 Apr 07
EXcellent!!! i really loved and enjoyed reading this.
1 person likes this
• Singapore
1 Apr 07
Oh, Les Miserables!!! I love this musical. I bought the CDs and I still listen to it quite often. And... "to love another person is to see the face of God". The tune for this phrase is so beautiful. ;-) This reminds me of something a Christian friend told me recently. She said that if you hate someone, you have essentially become a murderer. At first thought, this might seem rather extreme in thinking. But if you think it over, it seems that it is somewhat true. So when I feel hate welling up inside me, I try to remind myself to smother the hate and let go. After all, to love another person is to see the face of God! :P
1 person likes this
@joyce959 (1563)
• Philippines
1 Apr 07
It is very seldom that we could find true and 'perfect' friends. But once we found them, we are blessed and lucky to have them around us. That's why we say that friends are treasures too. You are very lucky to have those friends whom you see the face in God with them. I am very thankful that I have you in my list of friends here in myLot. Thanks very much for writing this post. You are an inspiration.
@Modestah (11195)
• United States
1 Apr 07
I love that Movie! what a great world we would live in if more were like Jean Valjean. His honesty, integrity, veracity - charity, loyalty. I cry thinking of the love he had for the child and the loyalty to her mother. Remarkable.
1 person likes this
• Hong Kong
1 Apr 07
CaroleeKaufold, I must say I love your posts coz they're very inspiring and I think I am very lucky to join here and read this. I too have two very very good friends and I do thank God for them. I think having one or two best friends is really cool, but you have three and you must be really lucky :). I know a lot of people who don't get to have friends like that. When times get difficult in life, I always think about how lucky I am to have 2 friends by my side. Thanks for your post, it motivates me to be a better friend and person :).
@VotreAmie (3037)
• United States
1 Apr 07
I really loved your post and thank you for sharing your thoughts. Everybody would like to have that kind of friends but I'm worried that they are hard to find especially nowadays where we live in a world full of materialistic people who don't care about others.
• Philippines
1 Apr 07
Honestly I did not read the post through the end. It is so mushy. Reading this kind of post makes me feel sad because I don't have the kind of friends that I dreamed to have. I must have a problem nurturing a truly friendly, caring and loving relationship.
1 person likes this
@Grandmaof2 (7604)
• Canada
1 Apr 07
Wow after reading this I felt I was very lucky to have you on my friends list. I guess that is the biggest problems today people just don't know how to be real friends. This thread was very refreshing and ended with a good warm feeling. Thank You and Take care !!!
1 person likes this
@fay511 (43)
• United States
31 Mar 07
You certainly sound like a very caring and loving friend to have and they and you are all lucky to have each other. I too have friends that I am very close to and we lean on each other in good and bad times. I'm sorry to say that due to circumstances beyond my control I have lost track of a couple of my best friends, whom I dearly miss. I must say I agree with you on your choice of a movie to get the line from too. That was such a fantastic movie with such a moral to it that I cried every time I saw it. Never saw the play of it, though. Wishing you the best.
1 person likes this
@tombiz (2039)
• Philippines
31 Mar 07
Wow! This is one of the most amazing post I ever read here in myLot. You are so inspiring! I totally agree with your sintiment. Though it is hard sometimes to love other people, doing so expresses the divinity residing in each and everyone of us. You really made me think. I could feel by my heart all the words you put here.