Cyber love Good or Bad?

United States
April 6, 2007 5:15pm CST
My sister called me to tell me that she was going to go meet someone, she had been talking to online. And she wanted me to go with her for support, but I told no. And she shouldn't go either. But she kept telling me that he is so sweet and nice and nothing bad will happen. We got into a big fight. I kept telling her that it can be someone who will do harm to her, and if she loved her son she would not go. To make a long story short I told I'm not going and if she went, she would be putting her self and her son in danger. At last she said she would not go, to make sure she was going to keep her word. I went to go pick her up and we had a girls night out. My question is was I being to protective of her or Should I agreed to go with her?
3 people like this
17 responses
@palonghorn (5479)
• United States
6 Apr 07
I think you should have gone with her, and the meeting should have taken place in a public setting. Although there are a lot of 'horror' stories out there, my own story is a great success. I too met someone online 2 yrs ago, but we met in a chat room of our professions. We live across country from one another, and he came to meet me, we stayed together for a week, and 2 months after our first meeting online, I moved to his state. He is a wonderful, caring, thoughtful man, and we knew from the start we were meant to be together. However, my story is the exception not the rule it seems.
1 person likes this
• United States
6 Apr 07
I'm happy for u. I'm the older sister and I guess I was to over protective of her.
• United States
7 Apr 07
I met my husband online. If I was your sister I would be very upset with you. You already stated she wanted you to go with her for support. It's a shame she couldn't count on you to support her rather than hinder her. I hope you realize that she will probably try to meet him or someone else later, and she's not likely to tell you about it since you'll try to stop her. And if she goes to meet someone without having anyone there for support and to help her if she needs help, the results could be disastrous. By asking you to go with her, she was TRYING to make it safer for herself.
• United States
7 Apr 07
ok I see your point, but she is only 16 with a son. And she has only been talking to him for a week, and he is 19.
• United States
7 Apr 07
You failed to mention that in your original post. That does tend to change things somewhat.
• United States
7 Apr 07
It must be hard for you but if I were you I would be doing the same thing as she had a baby and you know bad names of mother may effect the baby. But if she is so bold then how could you protect her. She may fix the next date and won't inform you
@lightningMD (5931)
• United States
7 Apr 07
i met my husband online..thank goodness my friend didnt think like you..she went with me on the first few meetings..i think you should have supported your sister and joined her...she might have just missed out on the love of her life..
• United States
7 Apr 07
she is only 16
@4cuteboys (4099)
• United States
7 Apr 07
I dont know. I kind of think you made the right decision and it kept your sister safe, so that is what's most important. Now I would worry about her going to see him now and not telling you. Maybe next time she brings it up offer to go with and meet him in a mall or something thats super busy. I'd still be worried, if he was really a nut, he could act ok on the in public meeting, but be crazy once he has her alone.
• China
25 Jul 07
you should go with your sister
@usama46 (861)
• Pakistan
7 Apr 07
no it is not good some time this is very bad for the girls .
• Canada
7 Apr 07
Honestly, I do think you should have gone with her. There are a few "Safety" rules to follow when meeting someone from the internet. First and foremost, you should always always tell someone where you're going. More than one person in fact, and give them a time estimate of when you'll be back. Meet them in a public setting, and if you can, take someone with you. You can never be too careful and if the person you're meeting is genuine, they won't mind and will understand. Cyber love CAN work. I met my partner online and we've been together three years. I upped and moved from the UK to Canada to be with him. I would never have done that had I thought it wouldn't work out. Especially as I had my children move out at a later date. It takes a little bit of time, trust and a lot of faith.
@joy358 (491)
• Philippines
7 Apr 07
I have never been in favor of cyber relationships because I haven't heard anything good come out of it. I have heard lots of horror stories about it, though, so I really don't recommend it. But still some people claim to have found true love online and made a success of it so I guess its not all bad or maybe they're just the exceptions to the rule. If you ask me though, its better to be safe than sorry in this day and age. There are lots of psychos out there who look for there next victim through the internet. So I guess you were somewhat right in warning your sister against meeting the guy. After all your sister really doesn't know much about the guy except what he has told her on the internet which might or might not be true. If she's really serious about getting into a relationship then it's better if it's with someone she personally knows and trusts.
• United States
7 Apr 07
Cyber love: cyber nuts!
• Hong Kong
7 Apr 07
No offense, but I do think you should go with her. She respects you and she asked you if you would go with her as a support. If I don't respect that person, I wouldn't even ask. And indeed, you could have gone with her before you make the judgment on the guy, it's unfair for him. You haven't met him and you use a general standard to block him out. I believe friends and family can be over-protective sometimes, but at the same time, I think we have to understand our beloved ones' best interest. If she is happy, I am sure you will be happy for her, right? I hope you would meet the guy before judging, that would give more solid grounds if you think the guy would do no good for her. Good luck to your sister.
• United States
7 Apr 07
I think it all depends on how long your sister was talking to the guy. If it was days or weeks, thats not long enough. but if it were months or years, that would have been entirely different. I met my wife online, we actualy talked as freinds for years before we met. A good word of advice I would give is to talk on the phone with the person, find out where they work, and get as much personal info before she meets him. When you have a good bit of information on the person meet in a public place with freinds. Its good that you look out for your sister like that, there's alot of creeps online.
• Mexico
7 Apr 07
because but that anything is almost amusement I don't believe that the cyber love exists like I say I believe that alone it is a strange serious amusement who finds the love cybernetico
• India
7 Apr 07
cyber love is good for those who like ot and bad for those who were against it
• United States
6 Apr 07
I think you're right. Things can happen, especially when meeting someone that you've only talked to online. People are crazy and it seems more and more crazy people are hanging out on the internet now a days. I think however, meeting someone in person, in a public place isn't so bad.She has the right to get to know this person, he may very well be a really nice person. I think her meeting him in public and carrying on conversations in public, and with others around isn't so bad. You could have gone with her to make sure she didn't agree to get anywhere with him that would have put herself in danger. I know I sound like I'm being contradictory, but not everyone is a bad person, so she has the right if she wishes to meet him, but only in public. She should always use her better judgement, especially if she feels anything about him may be off.
• Philippines
6 Apr 07
Give them a chance, but let the guy visit her in your house. If his intention with your sister is good, he will go to your house and visit her. If he has not good intention with your sister, he will not go to your house. Tell your sister that this time she should not commit a mistake again. Thank your!
@KissThis (3003)
• United States
7 Apr 07
About six and a half years ago I started chatting with a guy in a chat room. He asked me out on a date. After hearing about so many things that could go wrong I refused. About two weeks after he started asking me out a group of people from chat decided to have a chat party. He asked me if I would be willing to meet him at the chat party. It was being held in a public place with several other people so I agreed.I asked my sister in law to join me so that I wouldn't have to go alone.We are now engaged to be married. I guess what I am saying is I think you should have went with her to meet the guy.As long as you meet in a public place, bring a friend, and carry a cell phone everything should be ok.