It's good to have friends to visit, but it's also good to see them leave

April 8, 2007 8:50am CST
I know that sounds awful but my partner invited two friends to stay over the weekend and although it has been good to see them again, I am rather glad they have now left. I seem to have spent this weekend cooking and cleaning up while my partner and his friends have had a great time. I have just finished cleaning up the debris of lunch and now feel like kicking off my shoes and having a drink or three. So, how do you feel once your guests have left after a few days staying with you.
9 people like this
26 responses
• Ireland
8 Apr 07
I am always glad when friends leave after having stayed a few days with us. I find I have to be more attentive to them and I can't really relax. Family are different as I can just tell them if I am feeling tired and they will look after themselves. My daughter and my grandchildren have been staying with me since Friday and before they left to-day, she cleaned all the bedrooms and changed all the bedlinen and left it all packed and ready for to take to the Laundry on Tuesdya. I could never expect friends to to that and I don't think they would ever offer to do it. You should have a rest now and enjoy your few drink and I hope you will enjoy the remainder of your weekend.
3 people like this
9 Apr 07
Hiya hun, I hope you are having a wonderful time with your family. I even got a reasonable sleep last night, now I am almost ready to start on the garden :-)
1 person likes this
• United States
8 Apr 07
When guests leave after a few days, usually I'm feeling sorry for myself because we did so few of the things we meant to do, but yeah,it's also good to have peace and quiet again. I wonder if they feel the same way when I leave their houses. Probably. Have a relaxing evening!
3 people like this
@feralwoman (2199)
• Australia
8 Apr 07
Usually once a year we have my husband's parents come to stay for a few weeks. I'm making endless pots of tea for FIL, cooking meals, washing up, cleaning up and generally running around after them to make sure they feel they're having a good time over here in OZ, as it's a long way to come for a crappy time! Fortunately, they both love to walk and do things outside, so they do a few repair jobs and a bit of pottering in the garden. MIL likes to interfere with my chickens - so I just leave her to it, even though it annoys the hell out of me. I have mixed feelings when they leave. Sadness at the empty house, but relief that the house is now my own and I can wander around in my PJ's all day if I want! LOL
8 Apr 07
Funny isn't it, it's nice to have company but you are releived when they leave, then you miss the company :-) Right now I'm looking forward to a little time here, followed by a shower and an evening relaxing.
2 people like this
• United States
8 Apr 07
Well I think you are stronger than me! I can't stand having company longer than a few hours! I am also glad to see them go when they leave. I just feel uncomfortable when there are other people in my house. I have had overnight guests before and I hated it. I think the only people I would feel comfortable with in my house are my family and my best friend. I think it is a social anxiety thing.
3 people like this
8 Apr 07
Good point hun. While I didn't really mind having them here, I guess it was partly because they are my partner's friends more than mine, and I would have preferred a more peaceful weekend. Oh well, time I can relax now
2 people like this
• Canada
8 Apr 07
The only people that come to visit me are usually family and they are great. They constantly clean up after themselves so I haven't really had that problem. The problem I usually have though are little comments that my parents make about how I can't afford certain things. So by the time the week has passed I am usually pretty excited that they are leaving! I hope you get to kick back and relax! Take it easy hun, and don't over do it!
3 people like this
8 Apr 07
Definitely kicking back and relaxing now hun, a nice shower and an evening chilling out beckons. Have a good evening hun
2 people like this
• Philippines
8 Apr 07
I think that's the bad part when you have friends over. Cleaning after them especially after they leave, always looking for their well being even if it means you're going to be tired after. And I think these are the qualities of a wonderful and good host like you. Your guests are lucky that you are so accomodating. I must admit when I have friends over or a party, I'm relieved when it's finished. Some of my friend, especially women, are always ready to give a hand in cleaning the mess. But as a good host, I can let them do. Even if I really want them to help cleaning. (^^,LOL) But I'm happy even if I'm tired. Some says that the more the mess, the more fun your guests had.(^^,LOL)
8 Apr 07
I guess they did enjoy themselves, and it didn't take too long to get the place back to normal once they had gone. My partner did help clear up some of the mess in the kitchen too
2 people like this
• United States
8 Apr 07
I don't prefer to have guests. I prefer to go visit people.
8 Apr 07
Thanks for your comment hun
1 person likes this
@wmg2006 (5381)
• United States
9 Apr 07
I am a lot like you, I love company, but I am always kinda glad when they leave. I am a very social person and have always had lots of people at my house. I enjoy being a hostess and visiting with friends and family. I also like my alone time and am usually gald when they do go. it is odd to want to entertain and want to relax at the same time. I am usually the one doing the serving and cleaning with some help some of the time. I don't expect my guest to help though, I really want them to have a good fun time while they are here. As I get older I entertain less and less. I don't visit other people very much for long periods of time becuase I like to be home with my stuff! LOL
9 Apr 07
Now they are gone I can relax, I always feel I have to be on the go when guests are here, and this afternoon I plan to do some work in the garden and chill out. Thanks for your comments hun
1 person likes this
• India
9 Apr 07
i feel as wonderful as you are doing right now. specially if the guests happen to be elderly people, to whom you have to show lot of respect. here in India, we have a culture of treating guests like gods, like we say that how you behave with your guests, reflects your own family values. so its all the more irritating, if the guest is occupying the loo for a pretty long time, and you can,t shout at him/her. if your guest wants tea at the very hour you want some rest, you just have to oblige. if your guest wants to stay up the night and chat, you can't say no and retire to your bedroom. so, its OK to have guests once in a while, but even i'm glad when i see the back of them. its not that i mean any insult or i'm a miser who doesn't like entertaining, its just that i can't take this intrusion into my private life for too many days at a stretch.
2 people like this
9 Apr 07
Thank you for your comments, they certainly do ring true.
@Willowlady (10658)
• United States
8 Apr 07
Wow, seems like I have different friends. And hubby. When we do have anyone over they offer to help clean up and it turns into someting quite fun. Hubby is good after they leave also to reclaim our space. We always have to get extra chairs and things. Why not join those friends and having talked to hubby beforehand he might be the one to lead them all into picking up after themselves. Not sure, however, I was taught not to mess up since I was a guest. Maybe they have not been taught so. Good luck in the future with this.
3 people like this
8 Apr 07
They're not too bad, just a bit laid back on occasion. they've been discussing music most of the time, so it seems like I've done little else but clear up after them. Now we have some "our time2 for the rest of the weekend I think my partner and I will be going out soon, into the sunshine. Have a good weekend hun
2 people like this
@stella1989 (2274)
• India
9 Apr 07
Well its good to have friends visit by!! But when they become just a couch lover it really irritates.Thank goodness my friends are diffrent.!! They just come by themsleves to my kitchen to help me thorugh out,and thats fun.The real fun is in working together and having fun. They just wash some dishes on their own while I cook. And when they stay for coulple of days they just do the cleaning of thier bed and their clothes while im busy doing the house cleaning and cooking . Its good when they help like this.And even when I visit some of my fiends I do the same..!! WE are equal.
9 Apr 07
It's all back to normal now, the house is tidy and fairly peaceful. I plan to spend some "me" time later too, but I think my partner now realises just what hard work it can be. thanks for your comments hun
1 person likes this
@chloe9013 (532)
9 Apr 07
It varies with who it is i guess. I have a few freinds who can get quite tiresome hosting for but the majority i love their company and relish the time i get to spend wit them as i am not overly social, so when i am i make the most of it and dont focus and the little anoyances. I see my fella a few days every month and gosh i wouldn't care if he destroyed the house! Plus i love looking after him when he comes up my way, last time he came i treated him to lunch out and made sure he didnt lift a finger as hes working VERY hard to support is college course and his job. Glad your able to relax now after all the cleaning up, next time you should put your feet up and make your husband clean up after everyone (not that they will if they can avoid it _
9 Apr 07
Hope you had a good weekend hun, now it's time for me to chill. Much as I love my partner he can be a very messy man on occasion :-)
1 person likes this
• Canada
9 Apr 07
Where we live now, we don't have anyone to stay because we just don't have the room. However in the past, we've had people stay with us for a few days and it's always been great to reclaim our space once they've left. It's as though the house seems to sigh and settle down in getting back to normal lol. I know that sounds weird, but I know what I mean :P I don't mind having people stay with us, but I do expect a little bit of courtesy from time to time.
9 Apr 07
Having now reclaimed my space and sorted the house I can relax and chill out. As you say, hun, the house is settling back to normal :-) Have a great day
1 person likes this
@kitkat1 (1227)
• Canada
8 Apr 07
Dont worry dear you are not awful alot of people get that way including me. I am a very private person and not that i dont have friends and they do visit but short bursts is fine for me. I find it very tiring when they are staying in your home for any length of time you dont feel like you can do the usual whatever that is for you. You feel obligated to intertain so when do u get to relax hours after they are gone and you get your house back into order. So i am like you i like to see them come but there are times i like to see them leave just as much.
9 Apr 07
The house is now back in order, I got a bit of sleep last night and now I am ready to get the garden looking good. Friends visiting is nice but I can never relax when people are here. thanks for your comments
@rhinoboy (2129)
13 Sep 07
Thankfully, our houses have always been too small to accomodate overnight guests. The only people who've stayed overnight were our nieces who were around 1 and 7 at the time. I think the closest I can relate to your experience is after we had the baby and everyone we knew descended for a visit. I've never made so many cups of tea and coffeein my life! Because my wife was recovering for a couple of weeks, all I seemed to do was change nappies and host our guests. My wife barely lifted a finger - not that I'd expect her to then. But we both craved to have just a day or two alone together with our new baby, and were very glad once we'd packed off our final visitors each day!
1 person likes this
13 Sep 07
LOL it's at times like that when you often wish they would all just leave you alone isn't it.
• Malaysia
13 Sep 07
I am going to say that I am relieved! Lol. It's true because whenever there is a visitor I am the one who has to prepare the food and do all the cleaning. My husband likes to help but I think it is not appropriate to show to a visitor that my husband has to do all the house chores. Actually I am still afraid of criticism from other people about the roles of husband and wife. Here in my country many old people are still having a belief that men should never do women's job, i.e. house chores. For example my parents in law came to my house together with my two sister inlaws. One sister has two kids, the other sister has three kids. That makes eight adults and five kids. I had to do all the cooking myself. The two sisters are not helping, just imagine that. I didn't even have one minute to sit down. They were there for three days from Friday evening until Sunday afternoon. On the last day, I felt so exhausted I lay down without bothering to do anything. Lol. I didn't care if they wanted anything to eat. I had prepared the food for breakfast and lunch and I let them serve themselves. And I didn't care to clean up. It's up to them if they want to clean up or not. Which I think is quite alright and I should have done that from the first day they came. Lol. Visitors are nice, but sometimes they give me headaches especially when they are staying overnight. Lol.
1 person likes this
13 Sep 07
Thanks for your comments hun
• United States
8 Apr 07
Relief, here'e your hat whats your hurry!LOL I understand how you feel but I am also kind of weird because my friends, or family, always offer to help and I refuse. I have my own way of doing things and to tell them where everything is or goes takes more effort than doing it myself which is also quicker.
2 people like this
8 Apr 07
To be honest hun it is easier for me to do it all myself, and nice as these guys were, it's good to be able to relax now. Thanks for your comments
1 person likes this
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
10 Oct 07
i even feel glad when a friend visits and left after a few hours. LOL that's during times when im so into resting and being alone and all of a sudden someone would pop in and disturb me only to ask for an impossible favor or just chat or hang-out. ^__^;; i mean, i deserve some private time too for myself right?? and i would feel that way too if my partner and his friends are having a good time while i sweat over household chores. not to mention i hate looking like a maid and acting like a maid and being made like a maid! ^__^;; your nice that you were so patient and didnt show them any signs of being annoyed. if i were you, i could have made annoying noises and probably said a word or two to my partner. LOL
1 person likes this
10 Oct 07
LOL - I had *words* with him after they had gone and the place was back to tidy and peaceful.
@laurika (4532)
• United States
5 Oct 07
Welll Yeah I understand.I want be all the time hospitable, when somebody come and than would be tired for 2 days.Yeah it is good when they leave.
1 person likes this
5 Oct 07
Thanks for your comments hun
@andyliuzn (1029)
• Guangzhou, China
16 Sep 07
Hi Recyclegoth, Yep, I have the same feeling with you. So whenever my friends visit me, I would try to have them stay in some hotel and treat them in some restaurant as well.:0 WBR,Andy
1 person likes this
18 Sep 07
I will be having some friends staying with us at the end of the month and already I am dreading it. :-)