Is my Friend using me!

United States
April 8, 2007 9:25pm CST
I have this friend, who always calls me when she wants a favor, never to chit chat anymore, and once asked my daughter to babysit so she could go out with another friend and did not invite me to go. It was just out to a bar nothing so its not like they had Special Plans. Should I say something to her or tell her how I feel??
10 responses
• United States
9 Apr 07
she may not realize she's doing it. sometimes people get so caught up in thier own lives that they forget to consider those around them. you shpuls definitely let her know how you feel, in the mist tactful manner you can, with no blame or accusation. that would just put her on the defensive and make the situation worse.
• United States
9 Apr 07
ok, meant should and most, it's late and i'm a crap typist :P.
• United States
9 Apr 07
It sounds like she is to me. I have a 'friend' that's like that. I really don't talk to her anymore because I do not appreciate being used and lied too. I dropped her. We only chat on a 'friendly' not really serious basis. The sad thing is, people that use their 'friends' really don't realize they're doing it. I don't know how they can't see they're using people, but I think they just get so used to doing it, it just becomes part of their daily life so they never realize it's occuring. I'd call her out on it. Tell her you are not going to let her use you and walk all over you anymore. Tell her that you're not going to allow your daughter to babysit for her anymore, that you're not going to do her any favors. You have to let her know you're not going to let her do what she wants, it just doesn't work that way.
• Philippines
9 Apr 07
You should tell her of what do you feel.Cause its not bad to help your friend but you might look at it if it may cause good or bad.We do want to have a friend.But we do need to knoe our limitation being as a friend.If you think shes using you,or you dont feel good of what she is doing.Then you might need to tell her that.
@oxygen4u (53)
• India
9 Apr 07
yes u should tell her how u feel if she is yur tru frnd she wont mind
@oxygen4u (53)
• India
9 Apr 07
yes indeed u should go and tell her how u feel if she is yur true frnd she wont mind.
@djdeep81 (1061)
9 Apr 07
It definitely sounds like she is using you. I think you need to speak to her about this otherwise she is going to take advantage of you. Stand up for yourself.
• Philippines
9 Apr 07
Its like my friend also, she even asks me to babysit her baby and she'll go out and never asks me if i would like to go out with her. Just talk to her, voice out what you feel. And make her understand that if you really two are friends, she have to be a friend in deed. and not just she left you out whenever she like.
• United States
9 Apr 07
Why don't you ask her to return some of the favors? Next time she asks you for something say yes but tell her only if she'll help you with ____. Friends are there to help eachother out and the door should swing both ways. However, I do believe it is better to be taken advantage of than to take advantage of someone. I guess it just depends on how you look at it and how much you value her friendship.
@4cuteboys (4102)
• United States
9 Apr 07
Yes I would tell her! She sounds like she is using you, and being pretty selfish. Even if she isn't intentionally using you, she might not realize she is doing it, so it would be best for you to tell her how your feeling. She might get offended about you bringing it up at first, but just be nice about it and hopefully she will realize her behaviour has been unacceptable and shape up and be a better friend to you!
• United States
9 Apr 07
she might be very busy with her life so she might not chat to you but it is possible that she thinks you as her true friend and can ask you to do all these