What outlet do you use to express or release your anger?

United States
April 9, 2007 1:51am CST
We all get angry sometimes. Most of us prefer not to take that anger out on other people, particularly not on the people we love. So, what do you do to let that anger out? Or, do you keep it in? Do you let it build up, until you blow your top? I personally use writing as an outlet for most emotions. Whether I'm writing a story, a piece of poetry, or just writing in a journal. There are many who utilize martial arts, a punching bag, working out, any variety of sports, painting, etc. What's your preferred outlet?
6 people like this
39 responses
• Germany
9 Apr 07
When i am angry about something about someone...i usually stay quiet and let time cool me off by taking a walk or doing something i usually do to relax like reading or listening to my favorite music. I prefer not to say anything at all in anger ´coz then we all know that in anger more unfriendly words are said than necessary and mostly end up regretting what was said. But i do talk it out after cooling off -and i mean talking in simple terms, exactly how and what and why. I am never able to keep negative feelings to myself -must be unhealthy to do so. When i was younger, i also tend to write down on paper my anger and had actually come up with an article or two about it for the school paper. Sometimes, when i still don´t feel like talking personally to the person concerned i also write him/her a letter - it helps then to clear things out, most of the time. But really keeping anger to one´s self is not good ´coz you will then end up in foul mood the whole time and then you get to spoil the day of the people you meet because of your mood -it can be real contagious, so better beware...the world is too wonderful to focus on the bad things in life...
• United States
10 Apr 07
That was beautiful dassilavs. Thank you +
@mashimaro (1097)
• Philippines
9 Apr 07
Mine to release my anger I will talk to someone, I will tell him the way that I feel..the one who listens to me..and the one who give some advice. not a person to tolerate me.
2 people like this
• United States
10 Apr 07
It's great that you have people you can talk to about your feelings. :) +
@mashimaro (1097)
• Philippines
12 Apr 07
Yah, it is good if there is someone that you can rely on..someone you can talk to and listen. Before you'll do something that It might be worst.
1 person likes this
• Australia
9 Apr 07
I normally find some inanimate object to hit and or throw. Not at anyone, just something that will make a big noise - that usually calms me down. Not the healthiest way of dealing with anger, but at least no-one gets hurt! Or sometimes I just take a deep breath and smile. May sound stupid, but you just "act" like you're not angry. And after a while, the anger subsides.
2 people like this
• United States
10 Apr 07
That's true, no one gets hurt that way. And, if it helps calm you down, that's really what's important. +
@stella1989 (2277)
• India
9 Apr 07
I prefer talking my anger out on my maid.! she is just a great listener.I just spill everything out in front of her.Well its good when u have some one to talk to. And sometimes I eat a lot A LOT!! I am an emotional eater. and sometimes I just cry out loud to let the pain escape. Out of these I would say that crying out loud is the best option to get stress reliefed.Well that works for me the best. have a nice day.
• United States
10 Apr 07
Crying is definately a wonderfully efficient way to release any stress, sadness, anger, etc. +
1 person likes this
@ElicBxn (60164)
• United States
9 Apr 07
I take it out on myself! Not intentionally, but I've had 3 near bouts with an ulser because I don't let it out. Yes, I know, ulsers are caused by viruses, but it doesn't help to have your stomach churning acid out either and my doctor tells me I need to find an outlet for my anger. Mostly, tho, I'm pretty even tempered. I do sometimes slam doors if the situation is a short duration anger, its those long, drawn out things I start self distrucing on. I have been known to yell at someone, but I don't like doing that. Ohhh, now my stomach is starting to hurt....
2 people like this
• United States
10 Apr 07
When I was having stomach problems, my doctor told me that I was holding all my stress and anger in there. She advised that I write in a journal every single day. It really did help. I could have chosen to go to the gym too, but the reason she mentioned the journal specifically is because I could take it everywhere I went in my purse, and let everything out right away. Any constructive outlet though, really helps a lot. +
@RLH4871 (163)
• Singapore
9 Apr 07
I will eat and write. I tend to eat a lot of snacks when I'm angry. Also, I will write a blog but normally I'll delete it after a while. Maybe it is just a way for me to release my anger and not to tell others why I am angry. Sometimes you just can't hold your anger inside yourself and you just have to take it out on something. Stress ball does help for some people. You can squeeze it a lot, pop into your bag or pocket to squeeze as you walk, catch the bus, sit at your desk or in front of the TV. I was given a stress ball to release anger when I was still with my previous company.
• United States
9 Apr 07
Stress balls! I remember those. Yes, those can be a great way to release negative emotion. Unfortunately, I know what you mean with the snacking. I tend to snack more when I'm depressed than when I'm angry though. +
1 person likes this
@ElicBxn (60164)
• United States
9 Apr 07
I take it out on myself! Not intentionally, but I've had 3 near bouts with an ulser because I don't let it out. Yes, I know, ulsers are caused by viruses, but it doesn't help to have your stomach churning acid out either and my doctor tells me I need to find an outlet for my anger. Mostly, tho, I'm pretty even tempered. I do sometimes slam doors if the situation is a short duration anger, its those long, drawn out things I start self distrucing on. I have been known to yell at someone, but I don't like doing that. Ohhh, now my stomach is starting to hurt....
2 people like this
@sherrir101 (3671)
• United States
9 Apr 07
I am a house cleaner when I get angry. You have never seen a house so clean or a yard so raked. If write, I get madder. So...just get me the Lysol and I've got a REALLY clean house and my emotions and physical energy is spent then.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Apr 07
Wow, I wish I was like you, seriously. My house could do with a good cleaning, and if cleaning was my initial instinct when I was angry, boy would this place sparkle! lol +
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Apr 07
When I was young I tried the writing, as I grew I got madder and threw things and I got madder, so I decided since I am not a sports person or such, I had to use some physical energy and housecleaning it was. I can lose myself in it and the anger subsides eventually. Plus I get a clean house. (I have Adult ADD and I needed an outlet and my doc says I found one. ) LOL
@igloo85 (150)
• China
10 Apr 07
I seldom roared at the person who made me angry, I'm always angry by myself and refuse to talk with the person until the anger gone away. And i prefer sport to release my anger.
1 person likes this
• United States
25 Apr 08
Sports! I hadn't thought about sports when I started this topic. Sports are a GREAT way to find a release.
@carpenter5 (6786)
• United States
10 Apr 07
I do one of two things most of the time: I get in the car by myself, put in "Paradise Theater" cd from Styx, turn it all the way up and drive down country roads that are filled with pastures and horses and rose bushes. I sing at the top of my lungs, sometimes with the windows rolled down! Or, if I can't get out to do that. I take an SOS pad, and scrub the bottom of one of my pans, until all of that burnt on crud has come off and the bottom is shiny silver again.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Apr 07
Both excellent and healthy outlets! +
@whywiki (6070)
• Canada
9 Apr 07
I walk. Things get to much I walk. I can walk for hours if I am mad enough. It gives me time to think and calm down. I find if I am angry and people push me I explode and say things I shouldn't. I just blow! So before I let that happen I just walk away and go for a long walk until I have regained my senses.
• United States
10 Apr 07
I forgot about walking, in my orignial post. You're right, that is a great way to let it all out. +
@jcchaton (58)
• China
9 Apr 07
I eat! Eat chocolates. For my mind, chocolate is the best medicine to anger or dismay. I also eat many other food which can convey a sense of hapiness.I'm not a fat girl to your disapointment=) I really works on me. But now writing something may gradually become my new outlet.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Apr 07
LOL, I'm not disappointed that you're not fat, don't worry. Writing, I've found, is excellent when you really get into it. +
• New Zealand
9 Apr 07
I normally scream and yell at my loved ones, actually, when I'm mad. Not normally my current boyfriend though, as he gets even more angry than me. Both of us hit things to get rid of anger, which probably isn't the healthiest thing, but it works. Nothing else has ever really worked for me. The only other thing I can do when I'm really really upset is to cry myself to sleep.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Apr 07
Have you considered getting a punching bag, or something else that's designed to take a hit well? My ex-husband used to hit things all the time (he may still, I don't really know), but he kept injuring himself, or causing damage to the things he was hitting, and that didn't work well in the end. +
@crackhead (1826)
• India
9 Apr 07
Yeah i do get angry and i express my discomfort with people whom i am close to. Thats what they don't like as well as i am trying to avoid that. I never let my anger build up. I Will get let it out and will get normal in no time, unless that's a big issue which is of some concern. I shout at those who are close to me and then i will confess to them, during this course i will forget the reason why i am angry and get things settled down.
• United States
10 Apr 07
Thank you for sharing. +
@cheezer (92)
• Singapore
9 Apr 07
I used to throw things many years back but I came to realise that it's a very expensive way of venting my anger and frustration. So now, I would either shop (which is still quite expensive), sleep or eat junk food. Of all the different ways, retail therapy is still the best for me. I'll somehow feel very much better after shopping.
• United States
10 Apr 07
A lot of people actually feel better after shopping. Which I find very interesting. I wonder why that is. +
• Philippines
9 Apr 07
Whenever I feel hate, anger, grief, sadness, and pain I always try to mend it with eating foods I love and just like you I also write the things I can't voice out to others and sometimes things that puzzle me. I usually write them in my online journal in one community. Actually I entitled it "my laboratory of Pain" merely because most of my writing composition there are dark thoughts or something to do with my anger with the world. Writing is such a good outlet cause after you have write your anger you can review it and make some analization and give logic to your self. It even let us have a glimpsed of the thoughts that even us are not aware of it. I may not be a good writer but I at least I gave my whole heart in it.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Apr 07
So true. Writing is a great way to express a wide variety of emotions. +
@franxexces (1096)
• Philippines
9 Apr 07
I throw things but I realized that it's bad. So what I do? EAT!!! SWEETS.. it will really help!
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Apr 07
Thank you for sharing what you do when you're upset. +
• Philippines
9 Apr 07
I personally admit, that I have anger management problems. I get mad easily, although I try to control it. I get irritated even on small things. I'm working on it everyday, trying to control my anger. Sometimes it hurts me, because I take it out on my friends or on the people I love, when I can't control it. I'm a work in progress on anger. My preferred outlet right now is to punch a wall, or just swear. But not directly on people. I might buy a punching bag. God help me.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Apr 07
I think a punching bag would be a great tool for you. Try to use it every day, even if you aren't angry. It really does help. +
@dlkuku (1936)
• United States
9 Apr 07
It depends on how angry I am. If I am really angry, I cry, that is just the way I release it. Sometimes I vent to a friend, or on my blog. Sometimes I write in a notebook, sometimes I will put music on and blast it. Sometimes I take a ride in the car just to be by myself. It really depends on how angry I am and what I am angry about.
1 person likes this
• United States
10 Apr 07
Those are all very good ways to release ones anger. +
@kun2349 (23475)
• Singapore
25 Apr 08
In the past, i will just unleashed everything out on the spot and it often resulted in ugly scenes happening.. After which, i start to keep it in my heart and let it build up, but it's not a solution too.. After i picked up running, it has become my source of outlet.. And it feels so good to let out everything with just 1 run.. During the run, my mind will just auto clear watever anger i have in me, and it really works wonder for me.. hehe