October 19, 2006 5:01pm CST
Like Letterman's top ten? I was randomly browsing the net and found several sites with the top tens on them. I love them. They crack me up. One of my faves: The Top 10 Things You Should Not Say To A Security Guard When Caught Stealing Coins From A Mall Fountain 10) "Isn't there a robbery at the Orange Julius you should be investigating?" 9) "I'm searching for a hard to find 1998 nickel." 8) "DUH!! The Gap is having a sale!" 7) "Did you know that it now costs 35 cents to make a phone call?" 6) "Thanks a**hole (edited for mylot TOU)...I had just made a wish that I could clean the fountain out and not get caught! Way to ruin that wish!!" 5) "Have you seen that really cool gumball machine in the food court? It rolls down a spiral ramp!" 4) "I'm at the last level of Mortal Kombat IV and I need another quarter." 3) "I'm trying to match the exact amount of your worthless paycheck you Barney Fife wannabe!" 2) "See..I need a quarter to make a phone call to my Kleptomaniacs Anonymous sponsor and that's why I'm stealing the quarters in the fountain. I NEED HELP MAN!!!" 1) "Ummmm...I'm looking for beer money Got a top ten you like even better? Put it up. Some aren't too funny in my opinion...but that's MY opinion, lol.