I don’t know what to do!

@byfaithonly (10716)
United States
April 14, 2007 12:01am CST
Do you ever feel like the world is against you? Like everyone hates you or you are the last person on earth that anyone thinks about?That’s how I feel, not all the time but it seems that’s been my mood the last week. The real problem is until now I haven’t shared this with anyone. I have friends and family I could call and they would do anything in the world to cheer me up – but I won’t call. What is wrong with me? Why is it so difficult for me to admit to people that I need help, get lonely, or am having problems? I have been like this as long as I can remember. Any advise, suggestions, ideas? Does anyone else have this problem? HELP! I feel like one of the trees in this picture - the storm is building up around me and I have no control over it at all.
23 people like this
47 responses
@barlow662 (279)
• United States
14 Apr 07
It sounds like you may be suffering from depression. Not that I am a pshyciatrist or anything, but I do know what it's like to fight wit depression. When I was younger I had a head injury that caused a fluid build up in the front of my brain and has been linked to depression. I didn't really think it was that bad, but after I had my first child the real emotion started to com out. I was angry at the world and nobody could stand to be around me and I hated everyone for no reason. I thought that it was post partum and was put on medication for it. After my second child it got worse and anything could set me off...once again I was back on the mediation. For a really long time after my youngest son was born, I took the medication and then finally I was taken off of it. My youngest was now 3 and I was "officially" cleared by the doctor. After a few weeks passed it became worse. Finally, I talked to my family physicain and he referred me to a pshyciatrist. After years and years of fighting it, I am finally able to say that I don't have any signs of it and I no longer rely on medication to keep me happy. I would definatley recommend that you speak to a doctor regarding this because you can't cure it youself. I know what it's like to feel the way that you feel and it's not healthy to put so much blame and guilt on yourself.
@byfaithonly (10716)
• United States
14 Apr 07
I did suffer from depression several years back and was on medication for a time but got a clean bill of health. This is more of a stuborness within me - I don't like to admit I can't do it all all the time. But thank you, I will keep an eye on it.
4 people like this
• United States
14 Apr 07
Well, I hate to be the one to bring it up, but maybe it's menopause. I'm not sure of your age, but it does cause you to become very emotional. I guess age doesn't really even matter when it comes to menopause, the women in my family seem to hit it early in life..my Grandma was 39 and my Mom was 35. If this is some sort of pattern in my family, I'm in trouble, I'll be 31 next month.
5 people like this
@byfaithonly (10716)
• United States
14 Apr 07
LOL - no problem saying the m word - been going through it for nearly ten years now and you are right, that could have a lot to do with the "stormy weather".
4 people like this
@mssnow (9493)
• United States
14 Apr 07
I'm sorry to hear that faith. But at least you have people you could call. i think you should feel lucky for that much. I have no one who would help me. Everyone ne has their own problems so i just suffer alone. I have made it a point to be positive and make positive things out of negatives. Its the only thing i can do. Like if I am depressed, I just say at least i am breathing and the sun is shining. I can be positive about most anything. As long as not a whole Bunch of thing happens at once. If you want someone to talk too Ill talk to you. Feel better soon my friend.
6 people like this
@byfaithonly (10716)
• United States
14 Apr 07
Yes, I am lucky that I do have people in my life, it's just I always feel bad bothering them, which I know they wouldn't think that way but I do know they are busy with their lives and I don't like dumping my stuff on them. One problem is all my friends are married couples and I feel like the 5th wheel a lot of the time. I'm always welcome but I just feel out of place... I too am normally the 'positive' thinker. But like today, the sun came out for the first time in weeks and I've been sick in bed with a bad stomach virus - every 5 minutes to the bathroom stuff :(
5 people like this
@mssnow (9493)
• United States
14 Apr 07
I'm sorry Faith, I hope you feel better. You know I'm here for you :)
@Denmarkguy (1845)
• United States
14 Apr 07
Dear Faith, I'm sorry to hear your skies are a little cloudy at the moment. What you say here makes me wonder if your life has been shaped by often being "the strong one" and "the one who has her life together?" I say this, because I have often been seen as the proverbial "Rock of Gibraltar" in my family... the one who could always take care of things and pur wrongs right. And I realize that it can be a lonely "job" sometimes... because whereas you are there for THEM at all times, it foetn feels like nobody is there for YOU... because you are "assumed" to have it all together, all the time. Of course, I'm making a huge intuitive leap of faith here... I could be picking up completely wrongly on this. But I can relate to what you're saying, though. When everyone known they can count on me, it's difficult to stand up and say that they can NOT count on me, because I am going through a rough patch. And when I do, the response is often not compassion, but confusion... like I had laid a nasty deposit, in the middle of the living room. I don't know the surrounding circumstances of your rising "storm" so I am loath to dispense advice. However... think of one of those circus jugglers with seven plates they are trying to keep in the air... sometimes it's OK to give yourself permission to let one (or more) of the plates fall.
@byfaithonly (10716)
• United States
14 Apr 07
You nailed it right on the head - I am the Rock of Gebraltar, the one always the first to offer help, the one who always has a smile on her face. Dear I truely love your example of the jugglers and you are very right - I do need to let a couple of those plates fall :( now you and I know it's much easier to say that than to do it.
5 people like this
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
14 Apr 07
I think you feel this way because you need someone in your life,someone to share things with,probably someone who loves you and cares,someone to talk too.friends and family are nice but they cannot feelthat void in your life.you are a fairly young woman yet and i m sure you would love to find someone to love,that would love you back.Its fine to be alone sometimes but its lonely when you are all by yourself.I have a friend that feels the same as you,she gets lonely and she feels that no one cares too sometimes..she was happy when she had a relationship but that ended.i think it is perfectly normal for you to feel this way.Hoprfully one day you will meet that special someone and those feelings will leave
@byfaithonly (10716)
• United States
14 Apr 07
Yes, that does tempt me at times, wishing for a special person to share my life with. But then I think how on earth could I possibly fit another person into my life - I have so much to deal with already. I am sure I'm just looking for excuses - I would honestly like to have the right person to grow old together with...
5 people like this
@peavey (16856)
• United States
14 Apr 07
byfaithonly, I've read the other responses and I'm going to go at this a totally different way. You claim the name of Jesus, so let Him be a part of this. The word "stiffnecked" comes to me, but don't be offended. It's what God called me one time (and still reminds me that I am at times) We're all stiffnecked, unbending in our own strength, too proud, too self controlled. You say it's difficult for you to admit to people that you need help; is it difficult to admit to God that you do? He is your refuge and your strength. Those are not just words. He can be everything you need. I'm not repeating something I heard someone else say. I've been there; I know how hard it is to fight the stubborn battle of my own will. Send me a private message if you'd like. I'd love to pray with you. God really is the answer. Do you believe it?
• India
14 Apr 07
Hi I can go on writing a long response to this on "depression" but i want you come out of this quickly. So do only few things below -- 1. have a glass of water, 2. then change to some light clothes, white if possible, should not be tight, 3. sit down on ground, on grass its better, 4. close your eyes for a minute think about the happiest moment in your life wiht your friends, 5. while your eyes still closed concentrate on the spot where your eybrows meet, 6. keep telling your mind only to thing about the happy moments in your life, 7. Then think what you want to do in next one month and how? 8. Think of the similar situation happened to you in past and how your overcame that. 9. your eyes are still closed, now tell your mind to relax and not to think of any thing, just relax. It makes me feel better always. Hope will help you too
6 people like this
@Grandmaof2 (7603)
• Canada
14 Apr 07
Admitting you have a problem is always the first step and the good news is you realize it for yourself therefore there's no big problem. I think it sounds like you're in a rut and you just don't want to discuss it with anyone. I suggest you go talk to a counsellor someone you don't know. It's more tempting to be able to discuss things you may not otherwise do with someone you know. I used to do counselling when I was able to work and you'd be surprised at how many and who all go just to talk. It relieves stress. I hope this helps and I'm here for you, you're on my friends list, no excuse hon. Take Care. () hugs
@byfaithonly (10716)
• United States
14 Apr 07
Oh come on I don't need a councelor - I have all of myLot to talk to :) Seriously just dumping with this discussion has helped some and I was just reading one of the 'related discussions' at the bottom of the page a member was asking about natural remedies for depression and several people recommended Vit B - well, guess who hasn't taken her vitamins in a couple day! Me, and they really do make a difference. My stomach was bothering me yesterday so didn't take them, forgot the day before, and today I was so busy running to the bathroom I didn't take in much of anything... Am managing to keep something in me now though thankfully.
4 people like this
@tammyr (5955)
• Etowah, Tennessee
14 Apr 07
I was wondering about vitamins. I think that could be a problem. You are sick and that makes it worse also. You were sick a week or so ago also and you may be a little low on some of your vitamins. I swear by V-8 it is loaded with vitamins and so tasty! If you like it that is a good way to get your vitamins.
@KrauseHome (35526)
• United States
14 Apr 07
Sounds like you are suffering from a Severe form of Depression, and it is time you seek help. You might consider calling your Doctor for something to help with this Depression, and seek a Counselor or Pastor, you could trust to help determine what is causing your feelings. If you are harboring past ills, and problems in your past, this could me you hurt and feel like this as well. I can relate with what you are going thru, as I have been there. Best of Wishes, and here's a big (((HUG!!!)) to let you know I care.
@byfaithonly (10716)
• United States
14 Apr 07
Well, not sure how you could come up with "Severe form of Depression" from that brief discussion = which I certainly do not believe I have but I will gladly take that big hug - I am a hugger myself and can never have too many of those...
4 people like this
• China
14 Apr 07
yeah, that is exactly what I am also feeling these days. I have some really good friends, but I just don't feel like telling them what I am suffered, coz I am afraid that it bothers them so much. Then I always tell myself that I myself should be strong even I am alone in my world, in the situation like the palm tree in the storm. I don't know how far I can go, but I am always trying my best to change myself to adapt to the outside world. Be happy~~~~we can make it!!
5 people like this
@byfaithonly (10716)
• United States
14 Apr 07
Yes, we can and will make it. I think sometimes I feel like I have to be strong even when I don't have to, I mean like today - why am I so concerned about everyone else, I'm sick why can't I just take a day off.
4 people like this
@jbrooks0127 (2326)
• United States
15 Apr 07
You are clearly in a state of depression. And yes you don't have control because it is not something you can just talk yourself out of. I have a friend that is the same way. At times I think even worse. He is married to a great woman but she is very independent so I think perhaps he feels left behind. This is only my take on it, not his. But he has been to get help to a number of doctors and they have tried different medication. Some were worst than his problem it seemed. But I think they may have found something because he seems better. His was so bad he lost his appetite and has lost a lot of weight. I have only truly been depressed once in my life that I can remember. One that made me feel as you do. So I truly don't know what your going through. However at least for me I think being alone would do it. We all need people to help us through life. I know not you situation but it could contribute greatly to your problem. And it sounds the more depressed you get the more you isolate yourself. If that is true you are doing just what you should not to help yourself. Talk to your family. Let someone you trust in on this and let them give you a different perspective. I talked to my friends wife briefly once. She is of the opinion she is loosing him and considering what he used to be like I agree. Please do something to help yourself. This is not something you can do on your own and it is something that is not your fault. And I feel as you do, that storm is on the horizon and you need to seek shelter now.
3 people like this
• United States
15 Apr 07
I am not clear on the rules here but I would offer you a friendly ear if it would help. I have email and would be glad to talk to you or listen. Everyone needs someone to listen to them and I do hope you will take advantage.
1 person likes this
@Thoroughrob (11750)
• United States
14 Apr 07
I know how you feel, I feel that way alot too. Maybe you should see a doctor and he could give you something to take the edge off. Start looking at the good things. Things will get better. Start asking for help and reach out for your friends before you get too far down. Don't let it go.
3 people like this
• United States
14 Apr 07
Hmmmmm. It appears as if you're having some kind of depression or brain chemical malfunction. My best advice is to take all the negative energy and channel it into something productive so that you can take your mind off of whatever it is that is making you feel this way. Perhaps you could transform all this negative and sad energy that you're feeling into a powerful motivation for something more productive, like earning money here on myLot. When life throws lemons at you, gather it all up and sell lemonade.
3 people like this
@icequeen (2842)
• Canada
14 Apr 07
I understand how you feel. I am the same way and have felt the same too. The thing is you really need to talk to someone..or even just get out...go for a walk or to a friends house. If you feel like this isn't passing you should seek professional help or consider counselling...it does help. I wish you luck and remember there is always tomorrow...and things will get better...
3 people like this
@tammyr (5955)
• Etowah, Tennessee
14 Apr 07
Faith, my dear friend. I do hope you get to feeling better. Please do keep up with your vitamins. Also as we are just starting to warm up some may be from lack of sunshine. It is important to get some sunlight. As you have suffered from depression before you know that we can get help from our Doctor. If you keep having these feelings do see yours. And who says we have to do it all? GET SOME HELP!! We all have to share our burdens. If it is too much get someone to help. Most people will help when asked, so ask someone you trust to help with some things.
3 people like this
• Philippines
14 Apr 07
any problems always have a solution. if you have a problem, why wont you talk to your family or friends. you should feel lucky that you have many options to talk to. imagine those people who are living their lives alone? dont let the day come that you will regret not being open to the people close to you. and you said it yourself that they will help you cheer up? don't let that chance go. think of life not as full of problems. don't you have plans in your life? perhaps, you should not be too affected with emotions. emotions are cheap. it changes every second. think that, there are many important things you should do other than feeling down and low. have fun! life is short. you don't know what will happen tomorrow. so, don't let yourself regret not doing the things you want for your own happiness before there's no chance at all. we can never tell. life's goodness depends on how you act on it.
3 people like this
@mama4kids (690)
• United States
14 Apr 07
i am sorry that you feel this way. i think you may need professional help, not just friends and family. although, friends and family sure can help you out during the process. sounds like you are depressed. this is something that happens to many of us. if it lasts longer than a few days, and by the sounds of it, it has, you need to seek professional help. maybe some medication can help you out of this funk and put you back on track. no one should feel helpless. life is too short to be sad. i wish you the best of luck and please keep us posted!!
• Malaysia
14 Apr 07
erm.. i understand your situation.. i had such day too.. we call it the bad day.. :) .. u had a bad day.. u feel everything is not right.. u feel it's fated for u to be in such a luck.. right? i conclude this because you said that everyone is against you.. see... this is life.. and it's part of it.. shouldn't you learn to accept it? do share your problems at times.. if you find the right friend.. u'll feel much more comfortable
3 people like this
@Kristien (78)
• China
14 Apr 07
I don't know what is happening around you, but I know the friends and family can help us when we are in difficulties. Don't regard youself as a superman, why not tell them that you need help, is there any better ways? I think maybe you are a undepended persoon, or you don't want to show others your weakness, but in my opions, everyone will need others when he is in difficulties, you should remember you are not the last person, talk with your friends or family about your problem, maybe you will find the shortest way to go out, hope you to be fine soon:)
3 people like this
@easy888 (10405)
• Australia
14 Apr 07
Sorry to hear that and i hoep you can get over it, no matter what happen , your friends and family will still love you and concern about you, so you do not need to worry too much as you can share with them. Remember no matter what happen, you will not be alone,there must be someone support you even the whole world is against you, I hope you will be fine soon.
@gberlin (3836)
16 Apr 07
Jesus said, 'Come unto me all ye who labor and are heavy ladened and I will give you rest'. Jesus uses others to help. You must allow other people to help you because Jesus has given them the talent of helping others. It is the job that God has given to some people. The ministry of giving. Remember that Jesus also said that in order to get to heaven we must be like children. One reason is because they know when they have a problem and ask for help. They do not try to be self-sufficient like we adults do. We must accept Jesus' help. He has given the talent of helping to people and you must accept their help so that they can fulfill their mission on earth.
@byfaithonly (10716)
• United States
16 Apr 07
First, thank you so very much for the flowers - I think those cheered me more than anything has in days, well except for my grandchildren (2 anyway)stopping over unexpected today and filling grandma full of hugs, kisses, and I love yous :) I honest must admit I never thought of 'giving' as being a talent but I can see it now you mention it. I believe it is infact one of my talents - I am happiest when I am giving, helping, or caring for others. I also never thought of God wanting us all as children for the reason you stated but makes since also - I always thought it was because children haven't had the time for the world to corrupt them. Thank you so very much for giving me some serious matters to concider, I do believe they will help me.
1 person likes this