attachment parenting  |
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 Is Attachment Parenting sometimes just spoiling?
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1.  TeresaK (8091) | 2 years ago |  No, attachment parenting is NOT about spoiling.
Attachment Parenting is a philosophy based in the practice of nurturing parenting methods that create strong emotional bonds, also known as secure attachment, between the infant and parent(s) This style of parenting encourages responsiveness to the infant or child's emotional needs, and develops trust that their emotional needs will be met. As a result, this strong attachment helps the child develop secure, empathic, peaceful and enduring relationships.
In conjunction with the work of Dr. William and Martha Sears, and informed by current research, API promotes The Eight Ideals of Attachment Parenting. Recognizing that every family is unique, these ideals are guidelines to help parents understand their baby's needs to develop a secure attachment.
Preparation for Childbirth
Emotional Responsiveness
Breastfeed your Baby
Baby Wearing
Nighttime Parenting and Safe Sleeping Guidelines
Avoid frequent and prolonged separations from your baby
Positive Discipline
Maintain balance in your family life
http://www.attachmentparenting.org/ideals.shtml
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| TeresaK (8091) | 2 years ago | Please check my profile for a series of discussions I am posting on the eight ideals of attachment parenting. Hopefully they will enlighten you on what AP truly is meant to be. | |
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2.  mememama (2164) | 2 years ago |  NO! How could tending to my sons needs and using my intuition be spoiling my child? I always heard that when he was a newborn, that he would turn into a little brat. He's now a toddler and is very secure and now I get comments on how well behaved and sweet he is.
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 Sacrificialclam (4487) | 2 years ago |  My niece is well behaved and my sister gets comments. Not all kids who are AP raised grow up to be well behaved.
My step sister's kids are horrible little demons who deserve to be locked in a closet for fear they might light fires or demolish buildings by hands. I won't allow them into my house.
One of them decided he was going to ride my horse I was saddlebreaking. I saddlebreak horses for a living and*I* was having problems with this mare. He begs his mother to let him ride, she won't. So he gets upset and he goes and gets on the mare. He promptly gets bucked off and bitten.
I laughed. Hard.
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 6in12years (266) | 2 years ago | Are you saying your step sister practices AP and that this has caused her children to be horrid? The problem with your argument is that AP doesn't mean allowing misbehavior to go unchecked OR the child to endanger himself. | |
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3.  mama4kids (345) | 2 years ago |  i dont personally think you can spoil a baby. you can spoil an older child, but not a baby. ap parenting is all about the baby and younger child more than an older child.
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| juliansmom (119) | 2 years ago | I completely agree. It's not spoiling a baby to attend to his/her needs and make sure they are happy and content. There is a definite difference between a baby crying for what he/she needs and a baby crying because he wants something he can't have. My son is 9 months and just recently has started getting upset when he doesn't get what he wants. It's kind of funny sometimes lol, but you can tell the difference. Everyone always comments on how happy he is. He practically never cries, and never has. If he cries or is upset it's usually because he needs something! | |
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| 6in12years (266) | 2 years ago | AP isn't just for babies and toddlers. It's meeting your child's needs, and it changes as they get older. For my 7 week old, it IS about holding him as much as he wants and I'm able, feeding him when he's hungry, sleeping with him (b/c he sleeps better with me). For my 11yo it's more about knowing her friends, listening to her talk about her day, carting her to soccer b/c it's important to her. For my 8yo it's about knowing that she needs some physical activity even though she's not an athlete, about nurturing her art b/c it's her thing, and getting clearance for her to read at her reading level rather than grade level. For my 6yo it's about understanding that he is shy and needs extra time to work his way into a group, that he hates being the center of attention but can tolerate it if we give him space, that he has to have some way to burn off energy. For my 5yo it's about understanding that he needs an outlet for a very quick, creative brain and helping him find an appropriate one. For my 2yo at the moment, it's about understanding that she feels a little displaced by her brother, even though she adores him, and needs some extra attention right now. | |
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| mememama (2164) | 2 years ago | This post contains content of a mature nature. You must be Signed in or Registered to have the option to view this content. | |
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| lillake (1289) | 2 years ago |  What a sad life you must lead. No thanks.
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| Sacrificialclam (4487) | 2 years ago | Me, I had the support of my parents also but I slept in my own room. When I woke up from a bad dream, I'd go get my mother and she'd tuck me back in bed where I'd fall asleep. I never slept with them because they didn't allow it. I turned out fine. | |
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| 6in12years (266) | 2 years ago | This post contains content of a mature nature. You must be Signed in or Registered to have the option to view this content. | |
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| eden32 (2863) | 2 years ago |  This post contains content of a mature nature. You must be Signed in or Registered to have the option to view this content.
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| 5. 6in12years (266) | 2 years ago | Nope. Attachment parenting is about understanding and meeting the child's needs. Children need clear boundaries. Spoiling is giving a child what will harm him/her in the future to avoid making him/her feel badly in the present. | |
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| sangeetaD (20) | 1 year ago | yes, i agree with you. AP is about understanding, being sensitive to the child's needs, which means if he is upset and needs pampering -he ought to get it. This does not spoil him, but nurtures his needs. Its indulging him, and increasing his feeling of security | |
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| 6. eden32 (2863) | 2 years ago | Some parents may mistakenly believe what they are doing is AP when in fact it's spoiling. Giving into a child's (older child) every whim, is not AP. Letting your children run amok so as not to stifle them is not AP. Just like a light slap on the bottom is not the same as whipping your child- (neither of which I would condone but clearly one is worse than the other), nor does AP mean the child sets the rules. | |
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