What to wear to a wedding...
By patgalca
@patgalca (18481)
Orangeville, Ontario
October 2, 2007 12:14pm CST
This is different from the previous discussion about a "back-up dress". I posted a discussion about my nephew's wedding (the invitation sent via email, etc. etc.). Now I am trying to decide what to wear to this wedding. My biggest dilemma is that I cannot afford to go out and buy a new outfit. I am going to have to buy my 11 year old daughter a dress. My 14 year old is going to wear her graduation dress.
I know you are not supposed to upstage the bride. I have been told this wedding is going to be "a little different". I have seen the bride's wedding dress - antique ivory lace. Apparently the groom is wearing top hat and tails. Whatever.
What I want to know is whether I can wear the outfit I wore at my wedding. This was my second marriage and I wore a knee-length champagne coloured strapless dress with a matching tuxedo jacket. There is some satin trim in both the dress and the jacket. I have worn that dress on exactly two occasions. I finally fit back into it. The purpose of getting an outfit like that is so that I could wear it again. Most of the people at this wedding were not at my wedding (my brother and his wife were, as were my parents and sisters, and the groom's sister - that's it).
What do you think? I emailed my sisters for advice but they don't check their email often and have not heard a reply. This wedding is in less than 3 weeks. I really cannot afford to go out and buy a new dress.
2 people like this
7 responses
@foxyfire33 (10005)
• United States
2 Oct 07
The most recent "etiquette" I've heard is that as long as it doesn't look like a wedding dress and/or isn't fancier than the bride's dress than anything is acceptable wedding attire -even white or black dresses are allowed now.
Since you've sn both dresses you'd be a better judge of whether or not your dress is "better" than the bride's but from the way you described them I think yours sounds quite lovely for a wedding.
And if anyone does make any comments about you wearing your wedding dress...Just tell them that the dress brought you so much luck and happiness to your marriage that you thought you should share it with the new couple. :)
2 people like this
@patgalca (18481)
• Orangeville, Ontario
2 Oct 07
"And if anyone does make any comments about you wearing your wedding dress...Just tell them that the dress brought you so much luck and happiness to your marriage that you thought you should share it with the new couple."
Excellent response! Thank you. Now if I can only remember it when someone does say something. LOL! Thanks very much for your input.
And by the way, I made a small error - it is not a strapless dress, it is a sleeveless dress.
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
2 Oct 07
I wore a turquoise patterned sun dress to my son's wedding. I looked at the so called mother of the bride dresses and they were so flat and boring. Mind you, I should have worn a different color. Black and white fits me perfectly, but it seems that your dress would be fine. It is dressy, although a little boring for my taste. I like to be seen. I am sore of like that lady in that CSI episode that wanted to upstage her daughter-in-law.
Anyway I am the type of person who does not want to wear the same dress I wore at my wedding again. When I got my dress made, since it was beige, there was a suggestion that I could wear it again, but I thought, "you would not let me wear a white dress which of course I would only wear once and now you expect me to wear this beige dress again, well no thank you!" It is still hanging in my closet under that plastic and there it will remain.
1 person likes this
@rx4life (1930)
• United States
3 Oct 07
I say wear it!!! You can change it up a bit if you are concerned. You could change out the jacket for a colorful wrap and matching shoes...or change the jewelry and keep the jacket...you will look gorgeous and have a ball...we all worry too much about what we will wear...I do the same and end up having a great time no matter what I wear!!! But this sounds wonderful and hey...you can get back into it!!! That's reason to celebrate on it's own!!! I usually have the opposite problem...lots of clothes but not being able to fit into them!!! lOL..
I vote YES...wear it and wow them all!!!
@maddysmommy (16230)
• United States
3 Oct 07
How about dropping the jacket and using a scarf or shawl or something to place over your shoulder, OR just wear the strapless dress as it is, if you're ok with that. It sounds like your dress may be WAY better than the bridesmaids LOL
Feel comfortable if whatever YOU want to wear and bugger what anyone else says LOL Have a great time too!

@maddysmommy (16230)
• United States
3 Oct 07
Oooh teal and chocolate brown... that sounds really nice together! I have seen cushions with those two colours and they are beautiful!
@BarBaraPrz (51811)
• St. Catharines, Ontario
2 Oct 07
Is the jacket the same color? If so, maybe a different jacket? And there's always Value Village...
@ElicBxn (64169)
• United States
2 Oct 07
It doesn't sound like you are going to upstage antique lace. But you might want to consider perhaps a shawl or jacket of a different color rather than the jacket and shoes that are closer to the shawl/jacket rather than the dress. This might tone down your own dress even a bit more.
A shawl can be as easy as picking up some pretty fabric at the fabric shop (60" if you can get it, or sew 2 45" peices together, perhaps 24-30" wide) & some fringe to sew on it.








