Forgiving?

It's hard because even if you can forgive someone and understand what caused them to betray you, you know that they have that capability to let you down. It's always in the back of your mind then that they might do it again. It's a really difficult hurdle to get over in a friendship.

I was in a similar discussion not too long ago and I couldn't get across that even though I haven't forgotten doesn't mean I have not forgiven.

I even made up this story to prove my point: You have a friend or relative who had stolen something from you. You can forgive them, but you don't want to forget, and have this same person house sit for you while on vacation..


How forgiving I am if a friend does me wrong? It depends on what they did and I would hope that sooner or later I could completely forgive them regardless of what they did..

Depending on what has been done to me, it may take a long long time to forgive.
But I will never ever forget.
Forgetting allows the same thing to happen over and over again.

I am not easily offended to start with but when someone messes with my family... they are on my list! Once on that list, they are there forever.

You can forgive, but deep down you chalk it up and yes you are right, you are wary and depending on the nature of the wrong you will either let it go and shrug it off, or hold it until it happens again, one faux pas will just dent the foundations of a friendship, another one will shake the foundations down, once the brick wall has been smashed it takes years to rebuild if at all, sometimes the relationship is beyond repair and it's time for sanity sake to move on.

I can forgive,tho how long it takes depends on as they say " the crime " but i dont forget,sometimes that a case of i wont.
I have lots of walls up,i never let those people get to close,just incase they do wrong again. Some people might see that as i havnt really forgiven them? not sure.
Basically straight to the point & cant be doing with people & their c***.

If the person does it with intent to malice, I will remember the person's integrity for life. I may not remember the incident but I just know that the person is no trustworthy. Does it means I have forgiven or forgotten? It didn't bother me anymore.

if it happens,I will cross the bridge when i get there

One can forgive but cannot forget...that is my belief. Any event that makes friendships or unmake a friendship always have some consequences to bear. If such even is really hurting, it will time to heal. and it is only when you have healed that one can forgive, and these incidents are just being archive in our minds.

Forgiving is a very hard thing. It is entirely understandable and in our human nature to want to hold on to grudges and not forgive. However there are four things to understand about forgiveness.
1) It is not optional. Jesus commands us to forgive in the most emphatic manner. He told us that if we do not forgive our fellow man ( or woman ) then God cannot forgive us either.
2) It is bad for us physically to not forgive over any significant length of time. The bitter root that is implanted in us tends to make us sick over the weeks, months and years.
3) By being unforgiving towards those who offend or hurt us in whatever way that may be, we forget to realise that we also offend other people as well and we too want to be forgiven.
4) We tend to reap what we sow. If we forgive others, then we tend to find that others are also more forgiving towards us and vica versa.