Boys with long hair, so what?

I don't or I should say judge kids by their appearance. Their actions usually speak louder than words etc. There is nothing wrong with having you're own style or teaching your children to have theirs as long as it's in good taste. I lost my oldest son 8 years ago because of a heart attack at the age of 35. I was relating the story to a woman I've known forever and she told me she heard he died of a drug related incident, it made me go into a tizzy. I'm still in shock. My son suffered a heart attack because he found his Father dead 3 days earlier. His dad and I were divorced and he went to visit him. His dad had been dead for at least 4 days before anyone had found him. My son probably went into shock or died of a broken heart.
The lady that thought my son died from drugs hadn't seen my son in quite awhile. She probably remembered him when he had his hair long.

I used to work in an operating theatre. My hair was long at the time, but so was another guy's who'd been there for a couple of years. Not a problem in either case, as everyone wore surgical caps anyhow.

When they interviewed him for the job, one of the questions they asked him was 'Would you be willing to cut your hair short for the job?' Without missing a beat, he answered 'Sure, as long as it's a requirement for everyone here, men and women.'

Funnily enough, it wasn't.

I would let my son grow his hair long in a minute. I had him in longer hair over the winter. I cut it for the summer. If he chooses, then I will let him look however he wants to. I don't much care about his appearance if he is a good kid. I know your son is a good kid so there should be no issue. It's an old fashioned mentality that some people (the older ones) would never get over. I would have given them a piece of my mind especially if they know your son. That is just ridiculous. I like the fact that you let your son express himself the way that he wants. I think the second that we don't let our older kids express themselves the way they want to or need to then the problems start. I think your doing a great job mom...don't let anyone else tell you differently or make you feel differently because of their snide comments.

Hi Natrak, That is so prejudgemental of someone just because they have long hair. In my youth I used to dress outrageous and wore a punk style with my hair different colours but I never spat at anyone or hurt anyone but a lot of people in our area thought I was a wild child because of it. I agree that you are doing the right thing by letting your son express himself in the way he wants with the styles he wants it is what youths do. So what about the executive in the business suit who takes cocaine if they saw him would they think he was a junkie, no. Preconceived ideas of many but not all and it is not just the elderly others do it to. You are right to take the attitude let them think what they want to think as they will do anyway even if you had of put them straight. Ellie:D

i would always encourage my children to think for themselves and not be swayed by other peoples narrow-minded prejudices. When will people learn that a person is so much more than their external appearance? My brother was one of the most kind, gentle, caring people it has ever been my privilege to know, yet - because he was tall with a beard, tattoos, piercings and rode motorbikes, neighbours who had known him since he was a young boy 'labelled' him in a negative way. He always said he felt sorry for people who were so narrow-minded.

If I had kids I would let them explore their expressive side. (within limits) I would have a serious issue if they said they were going to fork their tongue or some other extreme that is not reversable if they regrets later. Tatoos fall into this category, but i would urge them to think long and hard about it first. They would have to use their own earned money. But gowing hair, is such a no-brainer! He sounds like a great kid and you and your hubby can be thanked for that. FORGET the ignorant gabby, gossiping biddies. They wouldn't recognise a quality person if they tripped and wallowed over them.

I do think it is human nature to have impressions first based on appearance. Afterall, it is one of our first and primary senses when seeing someone.

You likely did the right thing, but I tend to step in it every once in awhile, and to be honest (not saying I would be right to do it mind you) I'd be tempted, to tell the biddies: "Pardon me ladies, is that my boy you are bad-mouthing there? You couldn't be more wrong! How dare you place judgement upon an innocent and GOOD kid, based upon his appearance alone! You've lived here for 6 years and have you EVER seen or heard him be anything but kind, courteous and respectful of you and other tenants in the building? No? I thought so. Consider cleaning up your own backyard before bad-mouthing your neighbours....and by the way, isn't that a mickey sticking outta your purse there? It's 8 o'clock in the mornin' deary!"

hahahaha

My son was born with long hair and I let it grow until he was 2. He had the most beautiful long curls and looked so adorable but I got so sick and tired of all the older people coming up to tell me what a beautiful little girl I had that I got all of his hair cut off.

I wish I had never done it. The curls won't grow back now no matter how long I let it grow. And he looked so much better with it long that if he ever wanted to let it grow again I would let him in a heartbeat.

Ever since my daughter got alopecia she wants to do all kinds of weird things to the hair she has left like get the back cut really short and leave a long piece in the front and dye it blue. I'm letting her do it.

The only thing I won't let my children do before they become adults is get a tattoo. Everything else can be fixed.

As for the misconception about someone...yeah I've been known to misjudge on occasion based on how someone looked. But since I don't like very many people to begin with it usually doesn't matter if I have a misconception about someone because I rarely take the time to find out whether or not I was wrong or right.

Well, it's a complicated situation, indeed. Personally, I'll say, if it's accepted in the house and your son's friends also don't have a problem with it, there's no need to care what other people say about him. After all, universal popularity is never possible. Some naysayers will always be there. If you hadn't overheard what the ladies were saying about your son, you'd still have been happy with his hairstyle, isn't it? My parents allow me freedom in my style as long as it does not clash with the home ethics and my friends also appreciate it. People in this world are always ready to find fault with everybody else, especially the neighbours'. Jealousy also plays a role. Don't let this parasite talk affect your mind. If you are happy, and your son is happy, nothing else matters. Cheers.

I'd have no problem with my son growing his hair out long, but if he does it we're going to wait till winter cause it's to hot for me to let him do it right now. He's only 5 so I'd be the one taking care of it and hearing him complain he's to hot all the time lol. My husband had long hair up until late Jan of this year. He cut it for work because he got a promotion and the area he worked he was going to be dealing with the owners of the company, and there's a required dress code. He's never had a problem with having his hair long. No one's ever said anything to him outside of compliments. A few girls told him he looked like Orlando Bloom, so I see nothing wrong with that at all LOL.

You would think that people would have gotten over the long hair thing years go. I bet you neighbors have 'poodle perms' and wear flowered dresses. My husband grows his hair long - and when it gets to be 14 inches in length, we cut it to his shoulders and donate to 'Locks of Love" for cancer patients. He is now growing his third batch of hair! We ignore the people who think my husband is a 'hippie'. And boy - when those that ask or tell him that he should cut his hair are told why he is growing it long-they shut up fast. Ask your neighbors what they have done to help their community. Tell your neighbors to get a life and ignore their stupidity.

If we give to the poor, we are called philanthropists; if we ask why they are poor, we are called communists - welcome to America.