Mom, I think I'm bleeding...milk?  

Most of us men has been caught at least once in our life doing the one-handed trombone slide!

I remember back when I was just being fitted for my new body at the age of eleven, all kinds of new and exciting things were beginning to happen.
I still can remember the first time I played with my "Pelvis Elvis" and accidentally fired off my first load.

It was in the bathroom of my mother's home one afternoon after school, since that's the best time to do any kind of extra-curricular activity. I saw a "Victoria Secrets" catalog sitting on top of the toilet tank, so I decided to "read" it. When I say read, I mean study the pictures of the women's bodies with a lustful passion. Then I instinctively began the classic "man"-ipulation until I started bleeding...

...milk?

I panicked and ran to tell my mother that I had broken myself somehow expecting that she would know how to fix it. With my pants slightly down below my waist and my "XXX" hanging out at full staff, I am now standing in front of my mother scared to death and all I can see is the look of contained laugher on her face. As she began to snicker more, I began to become a little more relaxed because I figured if she thought this was accident I had was funny, maybe I'm okay.

Once she was able to get herself together, she quietly and calmly told me, "Pull up your pants and go talk to your father, you're not broken".