How Do You EXPLAIN to People..

i have often faced this problem.now i have stopped trying to explain,as anyways they misjudge me.

I didn't understand half of what you said. I don't mind listening (reading) about it, if it will help you vent out your negative feelings. I'll comment back when I read it:) It feels awful - your feelings of frustration are getting across thru your entry.

When it comes to families sometimes I don't think there is a way to explain it.
In that way your family sounds like mine.
I could tell my mother something til I was blue in the face and she just doesn't get it.
So a lot of things I just don't even bring up.
Either they are gonna get it or they're not. It is just that simple. No amount of explaining is going to matter.
Just tell them no you are not going to or you can't an just leave it that. You are an adult and owe them no explanations.
I know it is family but that doesn't always mean that they are as accepting as we would like. You know that.
I love my family but I don't see them often and we don't really have anything in common. I wish we were close but that is never going to be.

Then the question will come back to you. How long are you going to take before you are able to face up to you problems to resolve them?

The best way to face one's fear is to go at it head on.
If you feel that going at it head on alone is going to be tough, share your thoughts with someone you can trust. And then go face your problem together.

I too have met with people who are always healing. And more than a decade later, they are still in the healing process. It can be really tiring to the people around you to know that you can move on, but you refuse.
No one can help you with your problem if you are not going to take the first step towards the recovery.

Talking to the doctor and taking meds is not enough. Do something about the problem that is bugging you. Don't wait till you are too old to regret not doing anything about facing your problems earlier.

i think i understand your problem.....coz it has happened with me many times when i dont want to face a situation which i earlier loved to be in....and its very hard to explain people just think that you are being too self centered and fake.....so i generally lie that i am busy or something so that i can avoid the situation...but this inner feeling just cannot be controlled ....the urge that i want to speak the truth, even after knowing that nobody really gives a damn!! about it.....all they want is me to make them laugh and talk alot ....while i am not in the mood to do so.....

Often times, people think that if you face the problem head on, you will "get over it." When someone has been traumatized, and each persons stree point is different, the reminder of that event for them isn't just a stroll down memory lane. Being placed in or around the same scenario or people/person is so much more than a reminder. It is a rebirth of the exact incident, minute by minute, being not only seen in ones mind, but also felt both emotionally and physically.
You can tell family and friends a million times that there are trigger points that you, as a healing soul, wish to stay clear of. Unless they take the time to try and understand where you are in your life, it isn't going to matter.
"If you fall off a horse you get back on!" A dollar for the times I have heard that. What they fail to understand is that you didn't just fall off the horse. The horse kicked the S*** out of you repeatedly and you are not willing nor ready to "get back on."
Trigger points come from all angles and the only way to at least have some sort of control over them is to know their vantage points and stay clear of them. the difficult thing to try and explain to loved ones is this. By their OWN insistance of you going somewhere or doing something that will put you in a bad place, THEY themselves are causing you to hurt. It will eventually alienate them from you and then, what was it all for.
The greatest show of love and support from them is often for them to do Nothing. Simply let you know they are there should you need them and that they love you. That will allow you the best chance to heal and in your time, when mind and body are both ready. My Father passed on a simple saying to me that I live by as much as my brain allows me too. "If you do not want to get hurt...then don't place yourself in harms way." Words that family could do well to follow for you.
God Bless and good wishes in all that you do. I pray one day that your family sees and understands so that they can be the proper support team that you need them to be. Always, Darrel

occasssionalyy being urself makes others feel that you are overacting, so its better to put your point across in your normal way, maybe people who know you will understaqnd you

Its not that you arent explaining it right Moon...its that they DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT...becuase if they do REALLY hear you, they'll have to face the truth of what happened..I go through this with my own family...

To be honest... those that say "get over it" wouldn't last 5 minutes in my mind or yours. They would scream to be let go or find a window. I think the fact that we are here every day is a wonderful show of strength. and true, for the admittance that we really Do have a problem would be causing someone to admit that something really did happen to us... Hugssssss to you all... Darrel

Well yeah,
I've always lived with my mom and she's more understanding than my dad for it.
He left home when I was 12 and the only thing he's able to tell me since that day is that everything I do is crap.Even,when I find a new job or anything supposed to be good for me he would always say what I do is crap and this always slow me down in my life you don't know how because I've always admired him some way because that's the way I have been educated!
Nevertheless,I just had enough few days ago.
He knows about my social anxiety and he knows I'm having a therapy even though it's getting a little bit better recently...
So there was this friend of him who called me to offer me this job to clean buildings you know and I accepted to send her the resume because I know I don't have to deal with people in this kind of job and I was very happy about it but then few days later he told me he don't want me to do this because this is the kind of job "ladies" would have to do!
So for me,this time it was just enough I mean you know how hard it can be to be in my situation and so I tried my best to be able to move my a-s-s and get this job and then after I collect all my strenght he just stops me again just like this,this really you know make me feel like damn until when is it going to be like that?
So,at this point in time,I decided to listen to myself and only myself.I would listen to my mom because without her I wouldn't have a bed and all the necessary comfort but he can just keep his words,I just realize he is a jerk even with all the efforts I did to make all this better.
But well,this is life and it seems Freud was right!