On Saturday my son is moving...

Here in India we donot have childrenmoving out just like that. They move out if they go to a school or college which is away from home and they have to stay in teh hostel or when they pick up a job in a different city and they can't commute from home. Sometimes they takea a house of their own in the same city after they get married. Boys in any case do not move in with their girl friends to her parents place. It is something unheard of here. After marriage a girl comes and stays with her in-laws as that becomes her home. Boys very rarely move in with his in-laws.

Any these are differences in culture. The fact remains that when chidren move out how do you cope. Iknow it is very difficult. I have two daughters and both moved out on thh same day. I got a transfer to another city and had to put one daughter in the hostel for her MSc. The other daughter got admission for Law degree in another city.The family got scattered in three different cities on the same day. It was very painful. We dropped onedaughter inthe hostel tehnmoved to the city where the second daughter was put in the hostel and then drove to the third city where we were shifting. I and my wife kept driving in silence for about 3 hours without talking. It was as though a part of us had been snatched away.

We reached the new place and got busy settling down, but there was an emptiness in our lives. It took us six months to finally get adjusted to life alone.

That's something that's always baffled me about parents. It amazes me how few realize when they have kids that those kids are going to grow up, and that when they do the time is never long enough. Just me thinking and wondering. Then again, I don't have kids. What is it about kids and marriages etc. GOOD ONES ANYWAY, that causes time to fly? I know if my husband and I were to be together 100 years and he'd go before I would, it still woudln't be long enough. Hmm....

All the beest to your son.

Hey Loud, i'm living away from my parents i don't know how far it is. But it will take me 4 hours or more to get home by car, i don't have a car, it's public traffic. So you can imagine the distance. I have been here for 5 years, one year work, 4 years study in university. My mom cried the first day she sent me to school, and i cried too. I missed home for about one week, then it's ok for me. I can take care of myself, and i call parents. Strictly speaking, i've been out for about 8 years, another 3 years in high school, but it's much closer, only 30 minutes' bus.
Don't worry,great mum, your child knows your feeling, trust me

I really feel for you Loud. I didn't really think about how it must've been for my parents when I left home, but now I have a little one it's making me think about all these things a lot more. I remember being really excited when I left, and I'm sure it's usually the case that it's much more difficult for the parent than for the child.

I'm sure he'll be fine, and it's an exciting new life for him. Saying that though, I'm sure he'll miss you; who wouldn't eh ? He knows that you're nearby if he has any problems, and although you're worried about how to let him know you're happy for him without sounding like you want him to go, he knows you and I'm sure that he already knows that. But don't worry about getting upset, it's understandable if you do. (I'm getting upset just reading your post!)

(Actually, you could always show him your post if you don't think you'll get the words out, you've got it all written down here.. Then he'll definitely know exactly how you feel, but I guess that might not feel right).

Ooh, I just noticed that this post is a few days old, and it's almost Sunday now! So good luck, I'll be thinking of you. Let us know how it goes.

Please read my current post, my heart is with you TOTALLY!

bE HONOST AND TELL HIM HOW YOU FEEL, KEEP YOUR RELATIONSHIP OPEN, BE REAL, GIVE HIM ADVICE, ....WHO KNOWS HE MAY BE BACK...PERMENENT IS HIM GETTING MARRIED,,,,