Who is always the first to say "I am Sorry"?.

UGH! I thought my long distance relationship was bad. He is in Florida and I am in Idaho (northern and southern). I have no real positive advice for you. LD relationships are the pits. I don't say I am sorry anymore. There is usually something else going on beside being sorry. Lonely, missing him,needing to talk and saying the stupid stuff, and wanting to be close. Usually one of those. Sad, pathetic and realistic. Talking about those will get you further than 'I am sorry'.

if im the one being a "butt", as my boy friend calls me, then ill say sorry. i dont have a hard time admitting when im in the wrong and if i hurt his feelings ill say sorry, because he is truly the last person id want to hurt.

The worst part about long distance relationships is that someone has to be the one to call off the fight. Someone has to give in and say they are sorry and make up to the other one. The best relationships are the ones where sorry doesn't need to be said, it is just understood.

I was in a long distance relationship for several months where we avoided quarreling over the phone for just that reason. We'd fight and I'd tell him to go away until we both had a chance to cool off. Which is what I would have done if we'd have lived in the same city but in a long distance relationship the end of that cool off period has to kind of be announced. I remember one night when I was staying with him and we'd gone out with friends. We got in a huge fight (I mean screaming to the point that there weren't really even words involved, just screaming) and didn't talk for about four hours. Then without saying anything, he handed me a beer, lit my cigarette and laid his head in my lap. And that was "sorry."

I'm not in a relationship now but that kind of connection is definitely at the top of my list of things to look for in the next one.

It is natural in a relationship that both parties may commit mistake.

On my experience, saying sorry depends on who had the mistake or who starts the arguments. If its me who starts the argument then its me the first say sorry if its him then I'll wait for him to say sorry LOL

gosh!!!
we are almost dealing with the same situation!
my guy and i having long distance relationship...although we both come from the same country, but i'm studying here in Malaysia and he is back there... he is 6 years older than me, and yeah he is soooo busy with work, and i'm busy with school.. so, we don't find great time to talk...almost done with emails, but i'm the one who handle most of the talks in fact...our relation is cool but we only get angry due to silly stuff like: (i'm the one who is emailing u, why u never reply? or are u really busy or just ignoring me, or bla blah blah blah)
it is just that, i sometimes feel sad or alone and missing him when i see my other friends here hanging together with their boys...but, we do apologize and we are actually great couple if i keep calm and stop bothering him with such stuff...


smiley,

I don’t believe in saying sorry to the person I love most. Its kind of difficult to explain but what I feel is that ‘sorry’ means that we have done something bad unintentionally which has hurt the other person or caused some grave loss. Now this is OK with a stranger coz with outsiders, none of us are always careful yet we do not want to come across as rude and ill-mannered. But with my lover/husband the relation should be such that the very thought of causing him any harm should never come to my mind and same with him. Also if it was unintentional, then he would know it was unintentional without me having to apologize for it. And if its fights, well we have the liberty to call each other anything we like…no need of apology for that either.

It's so hard to be distinct from your boyfriend or girl friend ...
ans about saying sorry i thing who makes mistakes should be sorry..
thats what create respect and equality between both of you

It is good to hear that you both acknowledge each other's feelings and needs. I think it is important for us to say we are sorry, we are only human and we are not perfect, so there are bound to be ups and downs in any relationship.

I never used to be very good at saying sorry, but my husband is a lovely man who is humble enough to admit when he is in the wrong, or has made a mistake. This has helped me to be better at saying sorry. Now we both tend to say sorry even when one of us may not be in the wrong. It helps to keep our relationship strong.

I am sorry for you that you are separated by distance, it must be very difficult at times. Keep up the hard work, the love is worth it.

I am committed for more than 5 years now and our relationship is still the same- full of love, committment, respect, trust. Still we respect each other's views, commitments (to work etc- we both are working). Similar to yours, even we end up fighting on petty issues like not giving time to each other or calling up etc. but at the end we can't live without each other and that's why either of us say 'sorry'.

It really doesn't matter that whos says it first right? even you would agree on this. It's really great that even if yours is a long distance relationship, your two seem to be very much in love. from what you say, he apologises for not finding time for you, but then it's not his mistake also...and even you agree on this.

the simple reason for you to quarrel even when you know that it's not a fault of either of you is only that you both LOVE EACH OTHER- TRULY...

Have a great relationship.....Best of luck!!

I really think it is about evenly split between my husband and me. When we were first married I think I apologized first (but that was more on my part than his-I found myself saying "I'm sorry" for things that really didn't need forgiving). He is a wonderful man, who knows that neither of us are perfect. When we were going through premarital counseling the pastor emphasized how important communication is in a marriage. And we both learned a lot that has made our marriage stronger. I guess we are both growing in that way.