When You Can't Talk To Anyone Else...

I'm sorry to be hearing this Mykl. I've not been in a similar situation myself, so I'm not even going to try and provide you with advice for the sake of providing it. I do however hope that this terrible situation will bring the two of you even closer together and the here and now will be what matters moving forward. God bless mate and I wish every blessing for your Mum and family too.

I'm really sorry to hear that, it must be so hard for you. Make sure things are patched up good and proper. Everyone is here for you.
Unfortunately 2 people I loved were taken so suddenly, instantlly I never got the chance to patch things up or tell them how much I loved them. Make sure you tell her.

You've said you had "bad feelings" and they are being patched...maybe this is the purpose of that "patching", love. She's sure going to need you now. We all have a time to be done with this life, some go sooner than others. You've an opportunity to lend her YOUR strength, love, compassion and strong arms. Take it, do it, for your mom and for you! You can...I know it...cause....well...you're just way more than YOU think you are....I know that too.

And.....well...I loves ya! And am here if YOU need ME!....just sayin............

I am so sorry to hear this, Mykl! I don't have any answers at all.. I don't know how to make you feel any better or make anything better for anyone.. I only wanted to say that you and your mom are in my thoughts and prayers. and if you ever need to talk.. I'm here. I can't do much, but I can listen.

*big tight hugs*

try to remain strong for her,mykl.
cancer isn't necessarily the death sentence it once was.
my dad had osteo,liver and lung cancer (we suspect military related) and he lived 7 and a half years past when they gave him 3 weeks.

the hardest part with him was always the chemo.they give you iron pills..and..
he said to call them "yuck" was being very,very kind.

*hugz*

I am sorry to hear such sad news; I cannot imagine how hard that is for you.

My brother (who is 22) has a blood clot in his brain. It is basically inoperable; it would likely effect his memory and personality to try and remove it, so they have decided to wait until it is life and death. Which seems azz-backwards to me, but I am no neurosurgeon. When he was diagnosed, he was a newlywed with a baby on the way.

Once we (the family) got over the shock, there was an unspoken coming together. We are in more contact with each other than we have ever been in the past, and a phone call doesn't end without an "I love you". Not that we were un-supportive before, but we let the trivial things slide and offer whatever help we can to each other. If the phone rings and it comes up family, I always pick it up, which was not always the case.

As far as personally coping with it, that is harder. It is hard not to look back at stupid fights without feeling regret that the time was wasted. So I try to make sure that the time I have with my brother is "quality" time- we talk, we laugh, we wrestle (although I do miss smacking him upside the head!), in general get to know each other as adults. I want to have lots of stories to tell his son about how cool his dad was and how much he loved him.
Another part of it is just not letting his health be the focus of our time together. How depressing would it be to always be talking about it or thinking about it- not just for me, but for all of us. You can't forget that there is something bad happening, and you can't pretend it isn't there. But you can make it less important so you can enjoy the time spent together.

I guess that is my advice- enjoy each other and love each other.

I'm very sorry to hear this MYKL.

My dear, sainted mother languished for two years with that same dreaded diagnose before she went Home to be with our Lord, who is most needed at times like these. I'm not sorry about that, but I am about you and your Mom.

Let me just make this suggestion to you; my dear Mom wanted to talk some times while I was in denial of the reality, and I denied her that possibility --probably selfishly trying to protect myself-- DON'T DO LIKE ME!

I hope in your mother's case it turns out to be bogus and she can defeat it, but be vulnerable anyway. Let your Mom be your Mom and let her say whatever she wants to you.

Mike, you only have one mom. And hard feelings or not, mom is still mom.

And cancer has to rank as high as anything I know of for horrible conditions...no matter what age the victim is tagged with it.

Makes me wish I could sit across the table with you over coffee. I don't know if I would have many words, much less the right ones. But sometimes you just need a friendly shoulder to lean on.

HI Mike: I'm so sorry to hear of this; Dealing with a loved one that has Cancer is really difficult and it sounds like your family still has some unsolved issues;

I lost my Mother 12 years ago, it will be 12 years on the 26th of this month;

I lost a brother to Cancer 14 years ago this Sept. and many many other family
members during, and before, still dealing with my Father's ill health as he will turn 82 next month well on the 3rd of May, for a time there I didn't think he'd
make his 82nd birthday but I know you have many friends on here;

Try to talk to them, about it don't let your feelings get all bottled up inside
that's not good for you either;

Try to spend as much time with your Mom, quality time if you can, and who knows
maybe they will be able to get the Cancer out;

Keep us posted about the details here on mylot ok??

I'll keep you and your Mother in my thoughts and prayers ..

Even when we "think" we are prepared to lose a loved we really are not;

take care

I'm so sorry this has happened! I don't have any wise words (although I wish I did) to make things any easier, but please know that you and your mom will be in my thoughts & prayers. I'm always around if you ever wanna chat, rage, or just know somebody's there. Hugs.