Some questions about child abuse.

Funny you should mention this book. It is one I try to bring to people's attention. Did you know it is a trilogy? Second one is about his troubled teen years and then the last one is about the man he became. Good reading. Ya, it really brings it home doesn't it?

I did know it was a trilogy. I know it is a inspiring story but I have trouble with the first book. It just rips my heart out to think of that little boy.

Jen- I've had several students read that book for reports, and each time I have to read through them I just cry. It's such a sad tale, and we have to remember that there are many like that who miss the system, don't get reported, and sadly die from those conditions. Though we hear quite a bit about some of the child abuse, there are other forms of abuse that go almost unknown and do far more damage. Just the other day we heard a dad tell his son in the store "Guess you'll never be a stocker will you". The kid was like 2 or so and knocked something off a shelf at the local store. Sure, to many it seems like an off comment, yet to that child it is emotional abuse and is setting up a pattern for later in life of low self-esteem and self-worth. Namaste-Anora

I so agree. I just don't listen to the news some days. Just not strong enough to hear about it. We are having rapes on our green belt here right now. A picture of the guy and everything and they still can't find him. I hate it. I love the greenbelt and am paranoid now.

Even my husband feels that the media at times produces fear that is unwarranted. For example, we had an escaped convict in the area a month ago and they made it sound as if he was breaking and entering every house under the sun. The reality was, he was just running and they caught him running, not breaking and entering. The media has a way of making us paranoid, and that we cannot allow. We must live our lives freely, even it we may be cautious if that makes sense. Namaste-Anora

Oh yes, I sure have. I understand that. I just wondered if you thought the media had opened the door and make it seem more prevalent than it really is.

Rose- So true. I think it's that because of media we're hearing more than we did years ago. During the 1800's women were told to put up and shut up, essentially. Portrait of a Lady comes to mind in terms of some of the abuse women went through. And even Dr. Spock later said his "don't spank rule" wasn't all that productive. Balance is key to raising children, though abuse of any form is never the answer. Namaste-Anora

I do agree that the media does tend to over do quite a few things. I take news sabbats from time to time when I just can't handle anymore, and they do my soul good. Namaste-Anora

Ya, it just becomes too much at times. One right after another sometimes.

I do agree that media has done a lot to bring it out of the closed doors, and we're empowering people today to speak up. However, I disagree that mothers are less caring then they once were, and that dads are around less. We're finding a switch in dads today. A great many have taken to working less hours to spend time with family, and even those who work from home as to be there for their children. Since we left the hunter ages, dads are much more able in our current society to enjoy more time with their family and less time in the office. And as a mother I really do think that we are not less caring. Even though mothers now are able to leave the home and work if they so choose, that doesn't mean young girls or even young boys are not getting the upbringing they need. Most working mothers I know would take offense at that statement, because they do a wonderful job of balancing both lives, and their daughters learn to become independent critical thinkers. And most mothers today (save the abusers) are giving their children the tender side of things. And I think many fathers are now beginning to share that with their sons. I know my own husband spends equal time with both our son and daughter, and he focuses quite a bit on the emotional intelligence of our children, and works on developing their empathy muscles. (The "tender side" of things). I think the way to end abuse is to recognize it, educate about it, and educate those parents who may be abusers on how to cope with life. Just recently our news station did a special on how the economy was showing a rise in child abuse cases, from very average white collar middle income families. The loss of a job, etc was leading to tense times, and these parents did not have the coping skills necessary to deal with the stress, and children as well. The parents interviewed on the show were now in classes helping them to learn how to cope with children during times of stress. I think this could benefit parents up front so they could learn how to avoid abuse. Namaste-Anora

WOW! I so agree. What ever happened to the Waltons kind of life? The tender side seems to be gone. Some of the things young girls do in school now days is very alarming.

I do think mothers aren't as caring as they once were and since dad's aren't around as much as they were once, Mothers are becoming real B I T C H es. That is what was written in your original response, I don't think I read it wrong. It just seems you've now given slightly more contemplation to the situation, yet still believe we are somehow less caring as mothers, and that fathers spend less time at home. In times past fathers were not even around very often. They were off hunting (in early days), off at the office in later generations, and only in the past 5 years or so have we've seen a market change in more dads trying to work from their home in order to spend more time raising their children, or working less hours. Mothers do work, some out of necessity and others out of desire, but they do balance and those sons and daughters are still being raised to be tender. I think what was written prior is a gross over-simplification of the issue. I agreed that media has a lot to do with the coverage, and I agree that education is the solution. To say broken homes is the only cause is to say that every single parent out there is an abuser, and that is a misleading statement. I do hope, as others have said already that this issue is soon healed in our nation. Namaste-Anora

It is a sad state of affairs. I agree with you. I think the media makes it all more of a nightmare than it was originally.

Charity- What's sad today is that so much abuse goes unnoticed because it is not physical. Not that I condone any abuse, but emotional abuse is much more subversive, much more damaging, and takes much longer to recover from. I'm sorry the woman you know went through all of that. I do feel our laws are not as they should be were abuse is concerned. Namaste-Anora