What Do You Do When You Get Really Mad???  

So screaming is your outlet??? How long does it usually take to get you to calm down?? And yeah the games help me too.; Taking my mind off of it always helps the situation . Like stepping back and taking stock of it all after I calm down.

Depends on what made me mad,if I am already overwhelmed by somehting else. Like say my daughter had another seizure then something makes me mad it can take up to 20 minutes or yelling and then playing a game to calm down.

Okay but you kind of have a 2 step method then gear all the way out with the rage by yelling. Then bring your self down with distraction right?? I am just making sure I got it right. Are there any other methods that have worked well for you???

Yea I suppose I do have a 2 step way to my madness
So far no meds or anything else besides the yelling and pogo ahve worked. It's a matter of stepping out of the sitution that really makes the differance.

But have you been to that point where you can not step away?? Where screaming aint helping?? You just feel like going out and getting an M-16 and taking a stroll thru Wal-Mart???

Ok now you are making me laugh. Yea I was at that point I think last night around 3 am when my step daughter went off because I wouldn't let her drink in my home. She is 18 ain't no way that is going down. I paced back and forth on my front porch as not to wake my younger daughter,smoked a few dozen cigs and had myself a little panic attack. I pray alot when it gets that bad. I guess I would say my faith stops me alot from doing anything real crazy.

ahh okay so you have been there at that point. The really crazy part is you can calm down from it and the very next day they can say something or do something that brings the rage right back. It definitely happens with family the most. Does that happen to you?

Yep,I htink family is alot of the reason and also the cure to rage,if you know what I mean. SOme family drive you to the point of going off at them in a store,other times they are the ones that calm you down.

For me, family is the hardest to stop being mad at. I mean all the crap we deal with in everyday living, the last people we expect to fight with is family because the love that families have for each other. Have you ever just been frustrated at the fact you have to argue with a love one when they should be the people you do not have to argue with??

Yes,it has taken me years to learn the ones that care and the ones that don't. It is hard to fight with the ones that are supposed to have your back,but no one is perfect and we all have our issues.

Yeah and sometomes loved opnes of ours get hit with the cannon fodder of our anger and we do not even mean it. But hopefully , being our loved pnes they understand what we are going through and are aqble to tolerate us till we calm down

I have so been there before. I understand what it is like to get that angry. I start having chest pains and my left arm starts to go numb. So what do you do to calm yourself down?? How long does it take before you calm down??

I now tend to have my say at what ever is wrong then walk away or going some where quiet and have a good cry that way some of the temper go,if the person is still shouting i put an ipod in my ears and sit in the bathroom so i do not have to hear them that works great.

So ignoring people is your way to dealing with it?? What if that person is someone you can't avoid?? Like a wife or better yet, a son or daughter, and whatever they are doing is just enraging you to your very core?

I am on about my husband as i know me not answering back and walking away he hates so he will be alot angrier than me.lol.

So does the walk away thing really work with your husband or just anger him as well. Have you ever been in an argument with your spouse and it was so heated that when you tried to walk away or he did you wouldn't let each other?? Or you both were trying to get the last word in before one of you left???

I would rather walk away than make myself ill to give him the sattisfaction seeing me like that.I have actually got to a fist fight with him as well and life is too short to argue so i just walk away no matter what i hit a pillow if he gets me wound up.

Walking away is a good way to deal with that kind of situations.When we leave for a while,going to some quiet places,we can usually calm down.And it won't do harm to our health.
Have a nice day!
Sarah

Yeah but sometimes when I am fighting with the old lady, and one of us try and walk away, the other wont let them do it because of their anger. Or we try to get the last word on each other. I find it difficult to walk away at times. Do you have those times?

OKay I see what you are saying . But have you ever been so mad that logic is thrown out the window and stepping back is not an option at that moment ?? And you feel like you are going to just explode and go postal??? What do you do then???

Does that work for you every time?? Sometimes is it so bad and escalated you have to do something else? and what is it that you end up doing. I think if I started breathing like that I would hyperventilate as mad as I get.

Nope it never fails for me,When you blow the air do it slowly and imagine the heat of your head flow with your blow.It will cool of trust me,Its a technique that invented by chinise martial art to make them more efective and think with their brain,not with their rage.Sometimes it will make you fun if you just punch a guy or screaming.But dont give in to the rage that easily without your mind dicide what the best thing to do in this situation.

I used to take tae kwon do when I was younger,won a trophy and stuff,but once I stopped doing it alot of what my master taught me seemed to have slipped from my mind. I will keep this in my thoughts and see if it doesn't help.

I hope it will make you much more better in martial art,thara are two tipe of martial art.
1.The one who got more strength with their rage,sometimes its makes you seem like your body tough and had more strength.
2.The one who fight with analyse the situation and do what the best thing to do.
That technique in breathing semms like work eficiently for the second type.Its worth to try.

Yes it is something we call the chess theory as well. It is where you step back and look at the whole situation like a chess game. making moves and anticipating what will happen from it. Going thru each alternative till we find the solution that is the best way to approach.

Yeah music helps me clm down at times. As long as it is the right kind of music. If I listen to the wrong type O will be stomping around going nuts even madder than I was before I started. How long does it usually take for you to calm down

Yeah,that's right.
It depends on how angry I am.Usually it takes about 20 minutes for me to calm down.But when I am extremely angry,it takes longer.Once it took me even half a day to calm down.

Does music always do it for you? Or does it take other things sometimes when your mad? Wat is your alternative coping skills when the primary ones fail?

Music always works.I love music very much and only music can calm me down when I am mad.There is no alternative choice since music always makes me feel better.

So that is the only coping skill you use to calm doiwn . I think it is a good thing that it works so well. I usually have a solid three I like to use.

Yeah!
It is easy for me to be mad,but also easy for me to calm down.I like to live a simple life.Don't want to be occupied with too many things.
Have a nice day!

I wish it was that easy for me. I can't calm down so fast as I should.

Have a little faith.You will.

I really hope so. It gets hard to deal with things at times.

So you really have no method to dealing with it??? My old lady is like that she suppresses her anger and holds it in. That is probably why by the time she is thirty she will have high blood pressure and bleeding ulcers. I am not one to talk, I already havve my ulcer. Do you see coping skill here in this discussion so far that might help you?

Does this always work for you?? Or do you find that at times being silent does not work . You have got to say something?? Is there any other skills you have used that work for you??

And how long does it take for you to calm down?? Are you letting all your anger out completely when you do this?? Do you friends notice when you do those things, and ask you right away what is wrong or do they let you stew awhile???

That is good. But have you ever had a situation where that does not work?? What other methods do you use to calm down?? I like the breathing thing I do that alot. But sometimes it just does not work.

Well look at times when you have been mad. Look back and think about what you did to calm down. What exactly did you do??

yeah..I know..I will pay more attention to something else or something can make me happy ..such as play games or listening to the music~