Is it your fault if your husband has an affair?

i dont think so if husband have bad character than no one can help him all indivisuals are different from each other then why only wifes should be blamed .

Don't blame yourself coz its not your fault alone, he should be part of the blame too. Your husband is just trying to make you an scape goat for his misdeeds. Marriage should be a partnership in everything. You should talk about your differences, meet at the middle or compromise. You can not satisfy a man who looks for everything of your fault and negative traits and don't see and appreciate your every effort and positive traits.

Hi UmiNoor,

That must be a reason for everything. And I believe he had a reason for that too. But, ask this question to yourself, can you satisfy all his needs? Physically and mentally (zahir & batin).

The best way to solve it is for both of you sit together and discuss any problem that you might have. Ask him where you might didn't satisfy his needs and please be open. You might think you have fulfill all your duties but he might think otherwise.

Good luck.

I never feel that just one person is blamed, especially in this kind of situation. I feel that you are not completely to blame at all, especially if you have been such a great wife and mother! When two people marry, they marry til death do us part, and we all know that these days, it doesn't happen too often that those two will keep to their vows, stay loyal to one another, and stay together til the end. A lot of men and women tend to get sick of their partner, whether it be they want a challenge or new excitement, and they give in to their temptations. Which is just horrible. Marriage is life! When you marry, you need to realize that you married the person for who they are, and if u are going to get sick of it, then just dont marry that person, and save them the heartbreak later on. I have heard of this in many other people, because the other spouse was sick of the other and wanted more excitement, more passion. If you want to try something, why not try doing things differently, such as plan a date, or watch a movie together, or spice it up in the bedroom? Just different ideas if u r open to them. Good luck dear!

i think it`s your husband and your fault if someone of yours has an affair.because husband and wife is like clothes, together and united, not separated. when husband is happy, so wife is happy too. when wife is sad, husband sad too. i think you must improve your and your husband communication, make a good communication, i think it`s one key to solve your problems and understand each other of course

Assalam-o-Alaikum Sis......Don't worry yaar....everyone hurts his/her loved ones but it doesn't mean that whatever he/she is saying is TRUE and straight frm his/her heart........U said u love ur husband and he loves u too, then whats the problem........when someone is angry, he/she can say anything which in fact he/she doesn't mean in real.........believe me.....at the moment it looks like its the end of relationship but its not.........if u have truly loved someone then these things does not lasts for long...........be happy....try to share ur pain with ur husband...he will surely understand...........INSHA-ALLAH.
Praying 4 u
Tk Care
Allah Hafiz

This threatning behaviour is simply a method of controlling you through fear, he is lacking in respect and decency.

uminoor no it is not your fault,and if your husband is being abusive to you, that is not right, asian or not you are a human being and do not have to be yelled at and insulted. you do need family counseling,he needs it most. If it were me the next time he gets abusive and threatens to have an affair, tell him that if he does that you will not be there when he comes back. If you are a good listener and a good wife,what the heck more c an the man want? make him be completely clear on his wants, you both need to sit down and not scream and shout at each other and just talk this out.

I do not konw what problems exist between.But I want to say a woman needs love,men need to understand and support.Is based on the feelings of two people with mutual understanding mutual love