Check Out These Funny Nursery Rhymes! LOL  |
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|  Someone sent me these nursery rhymes and I absolutely lost it and laughed my head off because I hadn't heard of these before. I wanted to share these with you MyLotters and wanted to know if you have heard of any of these?
*Mary had a little pig,
She kept it fat and plastered;
And when the price of pork went up,
She shot the little ba**ard
*MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
Between two hunks of bread.
*JACK AND JILL Went up the hill
To have a little fun.
Stupid Jill forgot the pill
And now they have a son.
*SIMPLE SIMON met a Pie man going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the Pie man,
'What have you got there?'
Said the Pie man unto Simon,
'Pies, you Dumb A$$"
*HUMPTY DUMPTY sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the kings' horses,
And all the kings' men
Had scrambled eggs
For breakfast again.
*HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE the cat took a piddle,
All over the bedside clock.
The little dog laughed to see such fun.
Then died of electric shock.
*GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie,
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
And when the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too 'cause he was gay
*There was a little girl who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good, she was very, very good.
But when she was bad.........
She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo, and a sports car.
Hope You Enjoyed These Ones! I know I did.
Do you know anymore?
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1.  Wizzywig (4056)
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3 years ago
| |  We had a slight variation on the cat & fiddle...
Hey Diddle Diddle
the cat did a piddle
It piddled all over the floor
The little dog laughed to see such fun
So the cat did a little bit more
There are also others about Mary ... in which she also has a duck
and perhaps the oldest of all-
Mary had a little lamb
Full of fun and frolics
It tried to jump a 5-bar gate
and landed on its.... (errrrmmmm - feet?)
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| DanielleA (967)
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3 years ago
| | LOL That Hey Diddle Diddle one was just brilliant.
LMAO I absolutely love the Mary Had A Little Lamb one too. That was great. Thank you so very very much for your time, your answer and the laugh! Have a great day and Happy MyLotting! | | | |
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2.  marty3888 (1838)
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3 years ago
| | First of all, those were hilarous! Talk about laugh out loud.
Little Jack Horner, sat in the corner eating his christmas pie.
stuck in his thumb, pulled out a plumb and said holy sht am I high.
mary had a little lamb, teethas white as snow. everywhere that Mary went they both enjoyed aq blow. old king cole was a maerry old soul and a merry olde looul was he. he called for his pipe he called for his bowl, I guess we all know about old king cole. | | | | | | |
| DanielleA (967)
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3 years ago
| | lol I am so glad that you liked them and had a laugh.
I LOVED the ones you have posted there. LOL I laughed out so loud that I scared my cat LMAO! So that just made me laugh louder lol. Thank you so very very much for making me laugh and for your answer. Have a great day and Happy MyLotting! | | | |
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| DanielleA (967)
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3 years ago
| | hehe Thank you I am so glad you enjoyed them. I wish I could get more for I love to share almost about everything and anything to the MyLotters here. Thank you so very very much for your time and answer and have a great day. Happy MyLotting! | | | |
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| 4. suzzy3 (4148)
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3 years ago
| | They made me laugh how funny.I have heard the scrambled egg one humpty dumpty,but not the others.I loved the one about the little girl with the curl the best .Try to find some more.A grown up nursery rhyme book now that would sell well at christmas time. | | | | | | |
| DanielleA (967)
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3 years ago
| | LOL That is a great idea. If I could be bothered I would do some of my own funny nursery rhymes. I would be sure to share anything funny with MyLotters so next time something makes me laugh I will post it here. Thank you so much for your answer. | | | |
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| 5. arun2009 (3831)
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3 years ago
| |  Lol this is nice collection. Some body gave me this funny scientific translation by a great scholar.
'Two individuals proceeded towards the apex of a natural geologic protuberance, the purpose of their expedition being the procurement of a sample of fluid hydride of oxygen in a large vessel, the exact size of which was unspecified.’ One member of the team precipitously descended, sustaining severe damage to the upper cranial portion of his anatomical structure; subsequently, the second member of the team performed self-rotational translation, orientated in the same direction taken by the
Lol is this not funny? I say ‘scholars are always great persons’; they are always right.
Please share your views.
ARUN
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| DanielleA (967)
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3 years ago
| | LOL pretty good and thank you so very much for sharing that with me. So cool to share things with others. Thank you so much for your time and for answering. Happy MyLotting. | | | |
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| 6. doormouse (2368)
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3 years ago
| |  love them,i know 1 rude song and that's it,probably too rude to put on here
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| DanielleA (967)
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3 years ago
| | lol Great now I am way too curious lol. Anyways, thank you heaps for your time and for answering. Hope that you have a great day and have a Happy MyLotting. | | | |
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| 7. Hatley (48726)
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3 years ago
| |  hi ho daniellea oh my goodness I needed a laugh and I got
a whole bunch of them,he he he. I cannot think of one
that is so funny cause I am still laughing.I especially
liked Mary had a little lamb. good going. thanks.
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| DanielleA (967)
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3 years ago
| | lol Hello again Hatley,
I am so glad that you enjoyed these little nursery rhymes. Glad to help you with some laughter. Like totally glad! Seriously! I am so damn happy right now and you might know why soon because I will be posting it on MyLot soon LOL! Anyways, thank you for answering. Happy MyLotting. | | | |
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