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20 years later an x contacts me and gets upset email this discussion to a friend?

myLot reputation of 33/100. barrudaki (1262)   ranked 1,576 out of 23,225 in relationships1 month ago

Oddly enough my first boyfriend got in contact with me out of the blue. He got my contact info from a mutual friend. Not a problem and the first few emails were cool. Then he started asking me to call him and gave me his phone number I thought it was odd and didn't call. It came to the point were I told him I was engaged to a wonderful woman and he practically went off the deep end about how he kinda had a problem with it but not as much as other people we knew would. He then claimed he would always remember our make out sessions as if I was suppose to all the sudden change my mind about being a lesbian. I responded with "We all change and can't be perma 14 forever." Hell at 14 I wasn't even sure I wanted a boyfriend in fact after we broke up I didn't date anyone else for 3 years because I wasn't interested in dating I was more interested in school.

So far he has not attempted to contact me again. Has anyone else ever had a really old x get in touch with them and then get mad because you don't want to rekindle what they think is still there?

 
 
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tags:  mature content, ex getting mad, old relationships, first date, first relationship
 
1. myLot reputation of 100/100. JenInTN (3630)   ranked 72 out of 23,225 in relationships   1 month ago

I think that alot of times people tend to dwell on the past. They can even imagine what it would be like to be back together. I think that once reality hits them..it's sometimes hard for them to swallow. I wouldn't worry to much about it. He'll move on.


myLot reputation of 33/100. barrudaki (1262)   ranked 1,576 out of 23,225 in relationships  4 weeks ago

Hopefully he will go pester someone else from the past.

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2. myLot reputation of 98/100. muscles4me (8597)   ranked 3,237 out of 23,225 in relationships   1 month ago

I still ocassionally hear from an xbf of about 25 years ago. He was a liar, a cheat and abusive in all ways then. He is still a jackast. He can go months being nice as can be (by email) and then he will throw in an evil vile remark. I am thinking of not opening any more of his emils and just letting this go. I would rather be all by myself for the rest of my life (I am now 61) than risk finding anyone else remotely close to the kid of jackoft he is and was. SMILE! Sorry for the rant.


myLot reputation of 33/100. barrudaki (1262)   ranked 1,576 out of 23,225 in relationships  4 weeks ago

Sounds like you would be better off not responding to him. He has issues that go deeper than 25 years.

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3. myLot reputation of 95/100. twoey68 (9610)   ranked 3,427 out of 23,225 in relationships   4 weeks ago

It's possible that he contacted you to rekindle old feelings and when you told him you were a lesbian he took it as a blow to his manhood more or less. Some men are like that. Regardless of what path you've chosen, it still seems strange that he would think you would be interested in getting back together after 20 years. I think if it was me I'd talk to the mutal friends and ask them not to give out private contact info. I'd suggest if someone were to ask, they offer to pass along a message but nothing more.

~~AT PEACE WITHIN~~

**STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS**

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4. myLot reputation of 73/100. rameshkumaar57 (1525)   ranked 5,149 out of 23,225 in relationships   4 weeks ago

It is always better to meet your old ex. and tell him politely that you have changed, and you will not be find happiness with any man, and that is why you have made this change. I feel that you are afraid if you meet him again, your old feelings might re kindle in you. In order to drive away the old ghosts, meet him in person, and you will be strong when you come out of this ordeal.


myLot reputation of 33/100. barrudaki (1262)   ranked 1,576 out of 23,225 in relationships  4 weeks ago

This post contains content of a mature nature. You must be Signed in or Registered to have the option to view this content.

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5. myLot reputation of 81/100. skysuccess (2350)   ranked 1,898 out of 23,225 in relationships   4 weeks ago

barrudaki,

I suppose that was how and why the both of you weren't a hit in the first place and not surprising 20 years later, he is still unable to understand you.

In life we will just have certain odd balls and your ex is no exception. I just feel that you should not get yourself worked up and let him know that you are fine as you are and that he should move on from you.

I do not have any issues with all of my ex's and they are fine living out their lives elsewhere. Oh, and we are still in contact and would meet up at certain friends' gatherings or parties. happy

Hope yours will work out in due time and have a nice day.


myLot reputation of 33/100. barrudaki (1262)   ranked 1,576 out of 23,225 in relationships  4 weeks ago

I've stayed in contact with several of my ex's he is the only one who seems offended that I would move on with my life, like I am suppose to just pine away for him. He is the same now as he was 20 years ago, stuck on himself.

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6. myLot reputation of 91/100. smileonstar (2188)   ranked 884 out of 23,225 in relationships   4 weeks ago

Hello
you are right, people change in different way and he has no reason to get mad at you cuz he was the past and you are not with someone that you feel is right for you. Sometimes, he rethink again about you and him and try to get to know you know if you give a chance. well, this kind of guy... forget about him and let him goes...

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7. myLot reputation of 95/100. sid556 (10598)   ranked 1,175 out of 23,225 in relationships   4 weeks ago

This post contains content of a mature nature. You must be Signed in or Registered to have the option to view this content.

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8. myLot reputation of 94/100. rg0205 (1714)   ranked 3,671 out of 23,225 in relationships   4 weeks ago

I think he had an issue with you choosing a woman over him...well, maybe.

I did have a similar experience. An ex suddenly popped up out of the blue and said he loves me and that is after being out of touch for a while and the reason why we split up was because he cheated on me. So, that said, I don't get whether he was just messing with my mind but I didn't give it much attention. Sure enough, he got upset. I was just thinking: "What the hell?" in the end.

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9. myLot reputation of 99/100. puddytatt (859)   ranked 1,230 out of 23,225 in relationships   4 weeks ago

this bloke is being selfish, he still thinks that your holding a torch for him, i honestly think that he has issues, if he was so interested in you, why didn't he contact you before and not 20 years later? he seems to think that your gonna drop everything just for him, he obviously hasn't moved on and obviously thinks that your still into him, my opinion is, he should get over himself, life goes on and i think he should get himself another partner instead of hounding you, let's hope that he doesn't bother you again....


myLot reputation of 33/100. barrudaki (1262)   ranked 1,576 out of 23,225 in relationships  4 weeks ago

I doubt he will be hounding me again. I'm pretty sure whatever his intentions were they were headed off before he got out of the gate.

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10. myLot reputation of 89/100. angelajoy (973)   ranked 3,794 out of 23,225 in relationships   4 weeks ago

I recently had my x talk to me at Facebook and ask for my phone number. At first when I saw his friend request I didn't think much about it. I added him as a friend because after all, we had a history and it's fun having communication with people after losing touch with them for years. While I was browsing my Facebook account he sent me a message through chat. He was just saying hi, so I replied. But then he started talking about things that made me guess where the conversation was leading to, so I just told him that I had to log out. I quickly went offline on the chat, and true enough, in his last message he asked me for my contact number. I'm glad I signed out before I received that message because it would be really awkward if I hadn't.

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